Is it right to show love in only one way?

Question

Shouldn't we show love in the way our partner wants it or likes it?

If they like flowers give them flowers.
If they like cards give them cards.
If they like poems give them poems.
If they like sex give them sex.

Isn't it kind of wrong to force your partner to ONLY accept your love the way you want to express it?

A card is nice, but I don't feel love from a card. I'm just not that sort of person.
A poem is nice, but I don't feel love from a poem. I'm just not that sort of person.

Flowers or Sex its all the same thing its a medium of expression like money is medium of exchange.

It seems that if you really care for someone then you need to express your love the way they like it and not what is easiest for you. If they love you they should do the same.

Now if you hold back waiting for them to do it first or better or more then you are just selfish, after all love is giving isn't it.

So what do you think?
Right/Wrong?
Am I close or way off base?

The reason for the question is because people get lazy over time. We start out going to great expense showing how we feel and then it become what is easiest to do because we are too tired with life.
I'm just trying to point out sometimes we are not who we once were.

Answer 1

I wouldn't say either right or wrong, just a different idea. How we show affection is no doubt driven by how we were taught that it was shown.

So while neither right or wrong I think you have an interesting idea that deserves further pondering. Thanks for sharing it!

Answer 2

I think that if someone is in a relationship where their expectations aren't being met, they chose the wrong partner.

For example, I wouldn't have ever married someone who was into writing me poems or having romantic dinners. I don't like that stuff. When I dated people and I saw those things, I moved on.

If you marry someone and then all of a sudden they start behaving out of charactor, then I would be worried either way.

I guess what I'm saying is that I agree with you. But at the same time....why would someone be with a person that doesn't "get" them and meet expectations. That's what dating is for.

I think that getting into a situation like this would be unusual, unless they weren't thinking before they got married.

Answer 3

I definitely agree with you, although we arte contradicting theories.

You say give and show me love the way I want and need you to..meanwhile they are the type of person to show through different ways than urself-they find that expressing themselves through written words is better, through cards, poems, gestures & gifts but thats when honesty and communication come into play. It is important to ask Baby how can I better show you that I miss you, that i love being around you.....etc

Answer 4

Showing your love to your partner the way they want you to is a good idea but I think one should show one's partner love in many different ways. The little things mean more than most people know!

Answer 5

Both I guess. It makes it easier if you both like the same things to express love in, but like anything it is give an take
It is after all an expression of my love a form I choose it to be as much as I give it to another it should really be a bit of a mix

Answer 6

your right you should give love the way youwant ot but if you know something is gona make the other person happy thne its nice yo know but its nice to mix it up b/c cards, flowers and other things can olny make up so much you need to give really genuine love the way you feel is right

Answer 7

I agree with you. Show your love the way your partner wants you to.

Answer 8

Tough question, but if you think about it you are giving/receiving love from a person you fell in love with. In that case you fell in love with the way they love you right? Why question it now?

Answer 9

the only concern that retains any human beings from being unconditionally loving in the direction of all beings is us. a lengthy time in the past i assumed that love became something which you reserved for some particular set of human beings who you had judged worth of it. After a whilst I have been given to thinking approximately what Jesus had mentioned approximately turning the different cheek and loving our neighbor I placed the two at the same time and found out that he had made no exceptions in those statements. It grew to grow to be obtrusive to me that he meant that we exclude no one from the affection that we are meant to be giving. i began out thinking approximately my theory of love and without warning found out that I had no longer been loving all of us in any respect. I had purely been judging anybody and each concern. Judging somebody worth of love isn't love, it somewhat is purely judgment. i somewhat began to cry whilst i found out this. I observed purely how a variety of of my existence I had wasted being judgmental, thinking of myself as a Christian, whilst i became somewhat doing purely the different of what Jesus had asked us to do. i assumed with reference to the verse decide no longer lest ye be judged, and that i understood it for the 1st time. i found out that I somewhat have distinctive catching as much as do. maximum of possibilities have been wasted. I now attempt to be conscious the affection that I somewhat have for the worldwide in a usual way like Jesus asks us to do. If I start to sense afraid and think of that I see somebody that I shouldn't love because of the fact of something I somewhat have theory or heard i attempt to seize my mistake as quickly as accessible. I tell myself that I somewhat have forgot the actuality and have fallen for the same old trick that had fee me maximum of possibilities to be loving interior the previous. The horror of this information is often all it somewhat is critical to deliver me lower back to my senses and make me drop the judgmental nonsense i became thinking. I nevertheless have plenty to evaluation approximately love, yet a minimum of I’m making progression. Love and advantages Your brother Don

Answer 10

i'm tired from reading all those words.

don't worry about it and do what feels natural. a woman will appreciate any show/display of love.