I do not like the way that my husband speaks to our son, he seems to be hard on him to do certain things and he tends to make mountains out of moe hills. i understand that we grew up in the generation that children were seen and not heard but it is different now and i believe that our son should be able to voice his likes and dislikes and should not eat something that he does not like (except veggies that is a must for his health) but even that is within reason. I feel that the way he talks to him makes him retreat from him and not really want to be around him. He is always on guard when he is around and i remember being like that as a child and it suck. I have never been nor will i ever be a young boy do you need to be so hard and strick over boys. I am blessed that he has a father that cares, truly cares and takes care of our son but i just dont want their relationship to suffer in the meantime.
2007-10-24 04:28:29 · 8 answers · asked by ktnarga 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My 2 brothers and I grew up with a father who beat the holy majolie out of us every time he got a chance, most of the time for no reason at all. The average was at least once or twice a day. We did everything possible to avoid his rage, him blaming us for his 'terrible' life. If i knew then what i know now, the old man would have been behind bars, and hopefully still be there...
All 3 of us grew up to be exceptionally decent people, good parents and partners. The meer thought of being anything like our father is horrifying.
Your son is learning something. As long as he doesn't have to go through any misery, he will be fine and may grow up to be the father you wish your husband was....
2007-10-24 05:58:21 · answer #1 · answered by De-Activated Bad Profile 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
somewhat i do no longer think of it somewhat is that this variety of extensive situation. think of of each and every of the Dad's who are not getting the prospect to bond so strongly with our toddlers. it somewhat is often approximately mommy. as lengthy as you renowned your husband's thoughts and show to him which you at the instant are not attempting to take his place on your son's existence i think of it somewhat is going to be positive. Love isn't something that has a cut back your new child has better than adequate like to flow around. via giving your new child the two mom and father lower back you're giving your new child what he merits. interior the nicest way accessible clarify on your husband that it somewhat is somewhat no longer approximately how he feels, it somewhat is approximately what's terrific on your son. what's terrific for all teenagers is to have 2 loving mom and father. rigidity how fortunate Eli is to have a father that loves him plenty and how grateful you're that he picked up the slack for you yet now it is time to be a 2 make certain kin. If he's jealous that Eli could choose you presently it is likewise widely used. toddlers and toddlers flow by using ranges. Mommy is famous each and every so often and each so often Daddy is king of the worldwide. At this age maximum toddlers choose the make certain of the different intercourse.
2016-12-30 04:12:41 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've had the same problem. Have you ever told your husband what you say here?
If so - perhaps he just doesn't realize how great his relationship with his son could be if he lets up a little. He's raising his child like he was raised and honestly doesn't know how to be anything else.
You could ask him to go to family counseling. You could pick ONE thing that bugs you the most (which is what I did) and ask hubby to do things your way for two weeks. I picked talking about your day at the dinner table. It took awhile, but by focusing on one action at a time without putting hubby down, he started to realize just how much fun he could have with his kids.
2007-10-24 04:38:14 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
He is being a FATHER! All I can say is kudos to your man for stepping up! I know when I was a kid, I hated to do things, but I had to do them any way. Its called responsibilities! As for eating things he doesn't like, thats good too. He may only think he doesn't like them, then find out he does. I know my kids started out by saying they don't like something and I just tell them they have to try it... Not once have they not like it! Do you want a picky eater that doesn't listen or respect anyone? I think not. Be the parent and make sure your child knows he has the role of being the child. Good for your husband for keeping to the parenting roll!
2007-10-24 05:01:40 · answer #4 · answered by Beatngu 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband is hard on our kids too, yes he is doing what he was modeled growing up but that isn't an excuse to belittle them or treat them like crap. My husband was hard on the kids and none of them really want anything to do with him because he is an ***. They have formed their own opinion of him by how they are treated. I think fathers have high expectations and some don't know how to get that across in a loving way. Just my 2 cents on that.
2007-10-24 06:59:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through the same thing with my husband and son. I waited until my husband and I were alone and let him know how I felt. I told him I felt he was being very hard on our son and that of course he needs guidance and boundaries and rules and discipline but did it have to be so severe. We decided that it was best to let some of the smaller things go, such as not clearing his whole plate at dinner. Kids go through growth spurts where they have hearty appetites, and sometimes they have loss of appetite. My husband stopped being so Militant with him and they have a better relationship for it.
2007-10-24 04:42:58 · answer #6 · answered by stephy d 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
His dad is just doing what he was raised to do. Although it may appear that their relationship is a bit unstable at times it will all work out over the long run. Once this young fella grows into a fine young man he and his dad will laugh at the very things that you are worried about today.
2007-10-24 04:35:28 · answer #7 · answered by crazylegs 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just because you two have different parenting styles doesn't mean yours is more right than his. Personally, I think parents are too gentle and easy on their kids. Kids grow up to walk all over their parents. I don't put up with rudeness, talking back, not listening, etc. from my son. I give him choices too so he can be heard. There is a balance between too much punishment and too much coddling. You two need to sit down and come up with an agreement on how to raise your son.
2007-10-24 04:37:40 · answer #8 · answered by CC 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋