I have an ex-boyfriend, named J, who I have not had a relationship with in almost 3 years. We have been best friends since we broke up. We talk on a regular basis and see each other all the time. But he has a friend named M that I've been attracted to ever since we met and he's been attracted to me. Lately we've been spending some time together. We've kissed and hugged but we haven't had sex...yet. We want to but we're afraid of what might happen. If we have sex there is a possibility that we will continue and it might get deeper than just sex, considering the fact that we've been wanting to do this for 4 yrs now. Our problem is we don't want to ruin the friendship with J. They have been friends for over 10 yrs and this kind of situation has never occurred so M is scared of J's reaction. Am I wrong for wanting to mess around with M, even though its been 3 yrs since J and I have been together?
2007-10-24 04:08:28 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I would say you were not wrong because you no longer have any loyalty to you ex but since you are still friends then you really do and also the best friend is WAY wrong, you should never mess w/ a friends ex, I dont care how long its been. If you guys really value J then u and M need to cool it and just remain friends. If you cant be friends w/o getting hot and heavy, dont be around him alone for a while.
2007-10-24 04:20:04 · answer #1 · answered by Summer Days 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your ex-boyfriend did something to really hurt you, and you want to get revenge; then yes, go for it! But if you and your ex-boyfriend had a good relationship, and he went out of his way to be there for you, and help you, then don't do it. Usually, when a girl or a guy comes between two friends; either the two friends will choose eachother's friendship over the guy or girl, or the friendship ends. Whether or not you choose to be with this guy, be wise about your decision. Don't get hurt because you didn't take time to talk to both of the guys about how they felt. Do the right thing or better yet do what's best for you. Good Luck!
2007-10-24 04:28:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good for you to end that relationship but why did it take you so long to do so. First off give yourself some time go out and have fun. Your ex boyfriend friend has seen what you have gone through and feels that he can treat you better than your ex. I do not see anything wrong in dating him provided your completely over your ex..
2016-05-25 11:32:55 · answer #3 · answered by angelena 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your relationship with J was just a fling, not a serious relationship, I think there will be less of a problem, especially since it was awhile ago. But, if you just want to hook up with M, and aren't interested in him for the long run, why risk both your friendships with J? It sounds like you are no longer "wanting" to mess around; you ARE messing around, so decide which way you want things to go. PS, if you've been wanting this for 4 years, and you stopped dating J only 3 years ago, I'm going to guess you had feelings for M while you were dating J. Keep this to yourself - you don't need to open up any old wounds for J.
2007-10-24 04:28:40 · answer #4 · answered by oj 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it aint fully wrong because u cant help how u feel but oh my god i felt this exact way same thing but a shorter period of time and i figured that i needed to stop because it will always be acward for u he may act like he dont care but it willl ake him jealous and pissed dont sneak if yall s0o close den ask him *HOW WOULD U REACT TO SOMETHING LIKE THAT*maybe when he is is vournable and not suspisious.....but i advize to leave it alone it will work out better or just have a limit to what yall do...............G0od LuCk
2007-10-24 04:18:20 · answer #5 · answered by aqua 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u n ur ex-boyfriends, r friends now, then u could either tell him, that ur interested in his best friend, or just go ahead and go out but keep it at a distance if you don't want ur ex to find out yet...
2007-10-24 04:28:05 · answer #6 · answered by grace 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1
2017-03-03 17:47:20 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the guy you are seeing is overstepping his boundaries. it's an unwritten law not to mess with a friend's ex girlfriend.
do whatever suits you, however, i think M and J will part ways.
2007-10-24 04:12:22 · answer #8 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i don't think you are that wrong for wanting something wtih his bf...i actually know a lto of cases like urs..where my friend fell for the ex's bf...and hooked up..it took awhile for them to confront the ex and tell them...but...when u fall in love you fallin love! ther's nothing more to that..
2007-10-24 04:13:04 · answer #9 · answered by Twinkie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should not date his best friend because they been friends for 10 years and you dont wont them to stop being friends over you thats not right how would you like it if J dated your bestfriend and yall been friends for ten years.... THATS DIRTY let him go
2007-10-24 04:20:27 · answer #10 · answered by quanah pooh 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋