Why did you get married?

Question

Why did you get married?
Was it what you expected it to be?
Any Advice???

Answer 1

I got married because living with him wasn't enough for either of us. We have had our ups and downs like everyone but every time something bad or hard comes along, it just makes us stronger. My advice is to make sure you try to see the humor in any situation.....if you can laugh it makes the hard times easier to take.

Answer 2

My first husband passed away when I was just short of 24, I got married quite young. I married him because I really loved him, but there was pressure on his side to marry. I don't recommend to anyone to marry until they have furthered their education after high school, lived on their own and have worked for a while, maybe even travel. Then I remarried a couple of years later and it's because I really love my husband and I don't like to be alone. I don't think marriage is totally what most people expect it to be, it takes work and there is a lot of ups and downs. My now husband and I almost separated this past summer, but we are happier than we have ever been, we've been married for 11 years. All I can say is, don't sweat over the little things, don't be a nag and most of all, forgive and forget. The worst thing that couples do in marriages is throw past issues in each others face all the time. When the other has wronged you and apologizes for it, leave it at that. That's the hardest one to work on and believe me, my husband wronged me big time, but I have wronged him and it's important to listen to each other and have good communication, if you can't communicate, then how are two people supposed to make it work? Live and learn and what doesn't break you makes you stronger. Go into marriage with a positive attitude and enjoy and love each other and make lots of special memories together!

Answer 3

I got married because I wanted to start a family. I was 34 and she 29 when we got married 4 years ago. I figured that we were both mature enough that there would be no surprises. I was wrong. We did not live together until we married. We dated for 3 years. Living with your lover can be tough at times, but it can also be rewarding. 4 years of marriage with a 2 year old and one on the way has been a thrill.
My advice? have patient and accept that there will be disagreements.

Answer 4

I did not want to get married and avoided it until age 52. I lost the love of my life when he married someone else because I didn't want to. We were apart 9 years, and just got married after being back together for 3 years. We have known each other for 20 yrs. I wanted finally acknowledge to the world, myself, and God or Buddha, that this is my soulmate, the one I would do anything for, who adores me in return. I think a lot of people get married because "it's the thing to do" or their friends are, or pressure for other reasons.

I got married for higher, purer reasons. This person is my Lego, we snap together perfectly, and I wanted to build a life that lasts with him and have him with me all the time.

It is MORE than I expected it would be, better. The marriage has its own soul, and is an entity created by the two of us that no one else can approximate. We each have the ultimate cheerleader.

Don't get married in a hurry. If you do it right, it's the best feeling in the world. Being married is like the best slumber party you ever went to (if you're a girl) -- and it goes on and on, the secrets, the giggling, best friend moments -- plus, you want to, and get to, have sex. Sex got hotter after marriage.

(It sure is complex having a whole other family of parents, siblings and aunts/uncles/nieces/nephews, though! THAT is the hard part....)

Advice: let the little things go, try to out-do each other in loving acts, and be respectful of their thoughts, their hobbies, their space and their humanity. if he slurps the cereal milk or leaves dirty socks in a pile in your pretty bedroom, just smile. He'll be the knight in shining armor changing your flat tire in the rain tomorrow.

And if you're a guy, smile when she leaves her girly stuff on your sink. You'll be feeling like Big Strong Superman when you're changing her tire in the rain tomorrow.

Answer 5

I ask myself that every day. It was not at all what I expected. My parents had a wonderful marriage. They were truly supportive of each other, and they both put the other person first. They both gave 110% every day. The family came before work or hobbies or sports. That's what I thought my marriage would be, and it wasn't.

Advice? Yes, don't expect the person you marry to change into the person you want to marry. If he isn't who you want him to be today, he won't be after you get married.

Be sure the things that are important to you are also important to him. If holidays with the family are a big deal to you and he'd rather stay home, you're going to have unhappy holidays. If you go to church and he doesn't, there's going to be trouble.

Answer 6

The first time I got married I was young. I thought I was in love, and I thought that I knew what love was. Divorced 3 years later. Now I am remarried, and I realize that life is not perfect. You never get the man in the romance novel. He doesn't exist. Love isn't a feeling, it is a decision. The feeling goes away, love grows, I love my husband, I don't want to experience anything without him. When you marry someone you give and recieve. My husband goes to ballet's with me, and musical shows. I go to football games and races. It is a give and take. When you decide to marry make sure you are willing to stick it out no matter what (except abuse). You will know in your heart that you are ready.

Answer 7

The first time, I wanted out my parent's house. They were overbearing. The second time, I married my best friend. We hit some rocks in the road and it can be rough, but we are working to make it work. we have a daughter, we both adore.
If there's something you don't like about him/her and you really can't stand it, don't marry. You won't change them. They will change only if they want to. My husband has made some positive changes over the years, and it's not b/c of anything I've done or said to him...I didn't ask him to change. I do applaude his progress...

Answer 8

I got married for money the first time, and it wasn't anything like I expected. After 7 years I left, and a year later met the love of my life. This time I got married for love and it's the best! I love my husband so much and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, committed to only each other.

Answer 9

I married my husband almost four years ago (anniversary October 25) and I married him because we were in love. We had been through many tough times together and managed to stay together . It was really no different then us dating because we have stayed the same all these years only have a son now to enjoy. We love each other and will forever, as far as advice don't buy the milk if you can have the cow for free.

Answer 10

I married my wife because I came to find that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. I also found that she would be the best mother to my children (which she is an EXCELLENT mother).
It was more than I expected in some ways.
My advice would be to ALWAYS keep communication open and listen to each other. Give each other space and keep dating each other.