when the sex becomes monotonous in marriage what is the best solution?

Question

Befor marriage the boys and girls love each other very much. After many years of marriage the sex becomes monotonous and there is no much interest left in it for the man as well as the woman. In western countries they swap the partners and try to bring some spice in relationship. Is this prevalent in India? We heard it happens in rich and elite society. Is it correct? They say in some clubs the car keys are mixed and picked up by the ladies and then they have sex with concerned partner? Is it true? What are bachelorett parties? I think the girls in western society are far more free and open about sex and relationship than in India? Which is better?

Answer 1

Wife swapping really isn't as popular as you think it is. There is a percentage of married couples that do this, but it is not a large group of people compared to the married couples that do not do this. It also isn't very safe, as you never know if the person you are sleeping with has a disease or if they are possible of harming you or your spouse (i.e., a stalker). If you are genuinely considering this, please do not do this unless you have met the couple & gone through a lengthy interview process with them. You need to know the couple & make sure that they are secure emotionally & marraige-wise.


Before you start agreeing or suggesting swapping spouses I'd try finding other ways to spice up the marraige. Sometimes all that you need is to do something new like using toys, roleplaying, or having sex in a new location (like the kitchen instead of just the bedroom). If you are not comfortable in your relationship 100%, spouse swapping can actually ruin your marraige.

Answer 2

First of all swapping thing will only get you into more problems: possible diseases, extra-marital relationships, and more frustration after the initial high is gone. Remember each married couple has a key which opens the gates of heaven.....But the same key also opens the gates of hell.

I will recommend the following if sex becomes monotonous in marriage:

a) Take care of your body. Engage in regular fitness and active lifestyle. Make an effort to look physically attractive. Take a multivitamin/multimineral supplement.

b) Improve your sexual communication with your partner. Most couples from India are not very good at this: telling your partner your needs, your expectations.

c) Find out what drives both you and your partner sexually: is it sight, smell, mind fantasies. Are you submissive or dominating sexually. Is your partner submissive or dominating sexually.

d) Explore oral sex

e) Try ****** wear

f) Practice various poses of Kama sutra to the extent you are comfortable

g) Try being intimate on a getaway weekend. Leave town on a weekend and stay in a hotel.

Remember: the key to leading a lively life is to do something new each day and doing what we normally do in a different way.

Answer 3

If it has gotten to the point where you dont want to have sex with the person you are supposed to love, cherish and honor, and instead try to find a way to have sex with someone else as a means of improving your marriage, it is a lost cause and time to end the marriage.

Answer 4

Sex toys...always have new sex toys available. Also, try new positions. Don't knock it before you've tried it at least once, then, make an educated decision. Been married 24 years and I still keep her coming back for more. Every time I have a new little suprise/deviation in store for her.

Answer 5

You've asked a whole heap of questions, but I will just answer your main one. If sex is getting boring in marriage, just try something new/different. Simple. Different position, different venue, different time of day, different clothes, satin bedsheets, scented candles, massage oil, etc. Whatever you haven't tried, and are game for, try it. Get your partners thoughts, of course. And, most of all, if you and your spouse love each other, it makes things that much more meaningful, rather than boring.

Answer 6

Um, I am afraid i feel that it's up to the women to keep sex worthwhile. My wife has 3 orifices and she is very good with 2 of them, we do have more interesting ways of pleasuring ourselves as we both like a little excitement, I suppose...

Answer 7

their is difference between what you hear and what you see. i am pretty sure that things like that might happen in India as well, but the only difference would, that it may not surface in open society. individual in western society have much more control over their body and having intercourse out of relationship does not happen all the time - and its called cheating, unfaithfulness, dishonest, not committed to the relationship. If you look around you may be able to find examples.

Answer 8

Let me tell you dear, these type of things will happen all over the world, but in india we maintain secrecy much as we think illegal sex is not good. Routine life will always be bored, as an example you try to take variety of food when you are bored with daily routine food, either you cook at home are you go for a hotel, but we don't take food which has been thrown on the road or spoiled food, because it harms our health. It implies to the sex also, it spoils our image as well as our health. Sex is a not meant only physical collusion of two bodies, but also it includes mental tuning. Why it is happening to all is due to lack of communication between both partners and also we feel shy in expressing the need of sex to our partners. I strongly suggest you to take out time by both of you and speak to each other for sometime daily. Normally this distance creates casualty between partners. Sex is an emotional feeling and these feeling will be understood more by the person with whom you have long relationship and not by an unknown person. And also other reasons are as the years pass, your responsibilities increases not as a wife but also as a mother. In the initial stages as a mother you will more concentrate on children than husband, this is the juncture where the distance starts growing and afterwards as the children grow, father feel more responsible in satisfying the needs of the children and wife, he will be busy in earning to fulfill your wants. These are the areas where the distance becomes more between wife and husband and due to their responsibilities and hectic schedules they don't feel to express their views with each other and in turn due to more closeness they think that other partner should take initiative in knowing their problems. I hope this all might happened to you all these years, now think strongly and express your feelings to your partner and know his feelings also. I think once you are open to your partner, your monotony life will change to something different. And when it comes to foreign culture, most of them doesn't feel responsible for their children. I strongly feel that you would have understand the difference between our culture and foreign culture. Never try to imitate others, pave your own way and show that path to others. Most important try to maintain pleasureful atmosphere daily, not as a routine one which all wives maintain which itself disturbs your moods. We don't concentrate on small things which will solve our big problems. I strongly feel you will try to implement these things and make your life happy in the future.

Answer 9

Hi Dear,
I guess u r married n heard abt these swapping things frm someone else. Well it does happen in western countries n its catchin up wid Indians too very fastly. It happen more so in higher society n is very less in middle class families. People do this excite their life. DO u want to know anything else??

Answer 10

America is even corrupting the good women of india. Were doomed, no wonder the rest of the world hates us. It's cause our women are causing corruption to all the other women on the planet :)