my dad cheated on my mom. she found out and now hes moved out. its not the first time hes done this. should she take him back if he promises to be faithful?
2007-10-23 17:03:34 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
sweetie this is between your mom and dad and you should not be worrying yourself about their issues. but since this is not his first time than he probably will continue to cheat and mom should just realize that and move on. but dad will grow up and realize that he is two old to be acting his shoe size and will probably want to come back to mom. but mom at that point should insist that he seeks counseling. but let mom know that she will be OK. she needs to find things that she likes to do to occupy her time, so that she wont be sitting around thinking about dad and his cheating. mom needs to know also that she has done nothing to deserve his cheating. dad cheating is a character flaw within him and it has absolutely nothing to do with her. GodBless
2007-10-23 17:18:53 · answer #1 · answered by Crystal G 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think it is a little unfair to say that this is Mom and Dad's issue because it certainly effects you too.
Cheaters can break their habit but it is highly unlikely they will do it on their own. Professional counseling is probably the only way to really get over this habit convincingly and even then your father would have to be completely willing to get help.
I'm not sure how old you are but if you are having a hard time coping with it I would tell your mother or perhaps a school counselor. Just talking about it can help quite a bit.
2007-10-23 17:43:06 · answer #2 · answered by awfominaya 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said this is not the first time, so lets say, for the sake of the argument, that its the second time.
So he promised to be faithful at the wedding, and after the first affair. He is promising now, should he be trusted.
8th grade probability says to pick the highest likelihood you divide the number of outcomes by the number of tests.
Likelihood he is trustable:
(0 times faithful)/(two promises) = 0%
Likelihood is is NOT trustable:
(2 times unfaithful)/(2 promises) =100%
An 8th grade math geek would suggest you not trust him.
2007-10-24 04:47:39 · answer #3 · answered by Curly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once a cheater always a cheater! Your Dad doesn't have any idea what a marriage is and probably thinks love and sex are the same thing. The only way she should even consider taking him back is if he can demonstrate that he can be faithful before he comes back, they also need counseling. He also needs to have an AIDS test before he can come back. If they can't be faithful to each other it doesn't mean that you can't love them both. You can hate the sin and still love the sinner.
2007-10-23 17:11:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
That is between your mom and your dad.
Let them work things out on their own and don't let them involve you. There is likely more happening than what you have been told.
2007-10-23 17:22:48 · answer #5 · answered by Frenchy-68 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No,a leopard who never change the spot but for ur dad,i dun encourage them to disvorce or seprated coz u r an adult now,u have ur own path n after u have ur own faily,ur mum will slowly step to the lonely path...Talk to ur mum n explain to her that u already grown up n no point to talk abt seprated..Even she let ur dad go ahead,i can tell u,for a man liked ur dad,one of this days he will han come to his sense that who is the best for himself..But waiting for ur dad to change,he will never..but wait till he realised that who is the best might come easlier than change........
2007-10-23 17:39:59 · answer #6 · answered by rosa1132rosa 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Absolutely not especially if he did it before and what about all the other time your mom doesn't know about. I know it hurts you to see them apart but remember this isn't about you,you need to be there for your mom she will need someone close that loves her. Right now she isn't feeling very loved so show her just how much you love her.
2007-10-23 17:19:17 · answer #7 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's up to your mom. If she is prepared to go through this over and over again, and it's worth it to her - then she should take him back. She already knows his promises are not worth much; she has to decide for herself if she is ok with him just as he is.
2007-10-23 17:17:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, for nothing stop s him from thinking that he can pull it off this time and not get caught. There is no promise he can make that can be trusted
2007-10-23 17:13:02 · answer #9 · answered by Experto Credo 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
thats up to her. if it was me i wouldnt right away.. i would make him try to make it on his own and also make him earn hes wifes trust back.. that can take months to years if ever.. but he would have to be a open book to her.. if she wants to know where he is and what hes doing at anytime of the day or not and wants to check up on him then he has to let her do that.. it will take that to earn her trust back and him proving hes not doing anything. talk is cheap but his actions will speak loudly.. good luck
2007-10-23 17:15:52 · answer #10 · answered by Kat 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋