What is offence, why do people get offended?

Question

People seem to be able to get more and more offended as time goes on, and these same people seem also to be less and less willing to accept apology or reason.

So what is the function of Offence as an emotion? Why do we have it, and why is there more around now than any time in the last few hundred years?

Is there any way around it other than changing our ways?

Please explain your answers.

Thanks.

Answer 1

I think people get offended when they feel that an expected respect has not been given to either themselves or their ideas and concerns, such feeling arising from either words or actions or abstinence by the presumed offender. Feeling offended is different from being angry which happens when the feeling is compounded by the belief that the offense has been committed deliberately or with an ulterior objective. Being offended is different from feeling hurt which implies a higher level of expectation due to the relationship between the offender and the offended.

Are we getting more and more offended these days than in those days? I believe that the culture in the olden days did not approve of openly expressing the offense felt... these days the offended person feels free to openly accuse the offender. Moreover, we are generally becoming less and less tolerant in all aspects of life as a result of perennially feeling under pressure of shortfalls, especially of time, leading to impatience.

An apology or reasoning does not satisfy the offended person because basically the offensive aspect has never been considered as deliberate even by the offended... this unfortunately leads to a feeling in the mind of the offended that the disrespect being spontaneous implies that it is more inherent and real....... and placed against this subconscious understanding, the apology feels like peripheral or made up. I could be wrong in this analysis, but it does look very plausible. In any case, words like 'sorry' and 'thanks' have become mere formalities these days.

All said and done, there does seem to be a case as well for us to be more sensitive and tolerant towards others and their views and feelings.... the act of offense does get committed more often these days because of such insensitivity.

When I find that someone has got offended by me in any manner, I try to apologize without giving any justification of my words or actions and simply accept that I committed a blunder.... I openly blame myself for the offense caused. I do it because I feel the offended has displayed a weakness by being offended and I must lower my own pride to get the wave-length right.... in my own experience, more often than not, when I squarely take the blame on myself and communicate it, the offended person seems to get fairly pacified. May be you can also try this.

Answer 2

People hold some beliefs. They live by them. When someone comes along and acts or talks in a way that ridicules or even slightly goes far from giving those beleifs their due respect, they feel offended. The common way of expressiing that they are offended is, showing anger. A common reason for anger is that your (mostly unexpressed)expectations not being fulfilled.

Some even see poking a joke as an offence.

I'm not quite sure that more people are getting offended recently than before. But making people to not hold on to their beliefs even while studies suggest otherwise could help reduce this.

Answer 3

Offence is two things.

1) The interpretation of an action as personally directed, to inconvenience, anger or otherwise work against the offendee.

2) The interpretation of an action as negligent and an inconvenience or provocation against others.

Therefore to take offence is to respond to either interpretation with direct confrontation or indirect punitive measures (eg. tell someone off, cause the person to be inconvenienced or provoked in retaliation).

Answer 4

No more offended than ever. The ole time: to meet in duels!
As an emotion it's more like a feeling of being above others. Some want an apology ! We also have our own attitudes which don't please all! I don't think it requires an apology to be who we are. We can never please all the time. We need more tolerance though that so we can get along together!

Answer 5

People are bothered by others' actions and words because they don't mesh with the offended person's view of what should be. In the past, societal messages often told those people to shut up and accept it. Now, they have support socially and legally to complain about their grievances. Therefore, the complaints have increased.

Answer 6

When people say they're "offended", they mean someone hurt their feelings, nothing more, but lately, the word "offended" has become a buzz word that automatically stirs up support from any group that has a chip on its shoulder. Offending someone has become a taboo that automatically brands the offender as one who overstepped his/her authority by commenting on another member of society, regardless of whether he spoke the truth or simply voiced his opinion. Unfortunately, that tends to stifle free speech. It doesn't change the attitude of the offender and it doesn't force his/her acceptance of others, it just prevents him from voicing his/her opinion openly. I guess it tends to give a sense of legitimacy to the offended and makes the offended feel more accepted in society if they can't be criticized openly.

I'd be thrilled if I never heard the words "offended", "politically incorrect", "XXXXXphobic", "discrimination", etc., again. The overuse of these words has desensitized me to their meaning, and I have trouble sympathizing with anyone using them, regardless of the circumstances.

Answer 7

the reasn so many people get offended is that they are egocentric in nature
they have emotionally isolated themselves and created their own litle universe
nothing wrong with that until they inevitably make contact with other people who have done the same thing and then one person will try to force their viewpoint onto another causing friction