She is very self centered, and always feeling bad for herself, more than is necesary. Instead of trying to improve her life, she simply whines. She has had countless people try to help her and support her, and get her therapy for depression, but she fights every step of the way. Spending time with her brings me down, its like her constant gloom is contagious. She can also be two-faced, constantly asking people for things but then unfairly criticizing them behind their back. My boyfriend is a friends with her, and he thinks I am being mean, and giving up on her and being a bad person. I spent over a year doing everything I could to support her and help her improve, but it did no good, and she was never there for me like I was for her. Am I being unreasonable in wanting to end this friendship?
2007-10-23 13:58:44 · 5 answers · asked by Annabelle 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
It is a toxic friendship and you are right to redefine your boundaries with this girl.
She appears to get joy out of being negative and feeling sorry for herself & this is only perpetuated when people try to help her.
You don't have to cut ties with her - just decide that you aren't going to pander to her whims any more. If she wants to be negative then you have better things to do with your time, tell her that! Start having fun without her instead of staying home with her - and tell your boyfriend you're not being mean, you just don't want to be miserable!
Hopefully she will soon snap out of it or get some real help for her problem. Good luck.
2007-10-23 14:09:08 · answer #1 · answered by Jen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Spending time with her brings me down, its like her constant gloom is contagious. She can also be two-faced, constantly asking people for things but then unfairly criticizing them behind their back.
That could be me ^^ about my poor next door neighbor. SIGH
Poor thing dont get it that she only hurts herself when she goes around bringing others down with her, but i refuse to play in that pool!
Im not that type of gal, and I love Peepz!
So, keep on SMILIN and if she brings you down, its poison to the soul....back away from poison, hun! It hurts your heart, but you have to do what is healthy for you , or you will be ILL, literally!
2007-10-23 14:11:26 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No--you are not responsible to her or anyone else--you worry about yourself. This girl has issues that are strictly manipulative and attention seeking----a form of immaturity--and no one is helping her improve--that is obvious--she knows exactly how to get attention--and she is getting it--it is a waste of everyones time and effort--so save your time and effort for yourself---and tell that guy to mind his own business--you handle that girl issue as you see fit. SHE is unreasonable--not you---so move on--find other cool friends and enjoy each other in a normal way.
2007-10-23 14:06:32 · answer #3 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't waste your time on those who waste their time not excepting help [i think that make sense.lol] If you tried everything and she doesn't see what a great person you are trying soo hard to get her help... then she is really a waste of your time.
2007-10-23 14:09:26 · answer #4 · answered by smplytffny 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she is this negative and doesn't want to help herself, end the relationship. You can't help those that don''t want to help themselves.
2007-10-23 14:02:40 · answer #5 · answered by Stuck in the middle of nowhere 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋