How many men look at porn? Hubby says ALL men do, I say it's degrading and disrespectful to women.?

Question

My Hubby subscribes to playboy, talks dirty to women in chat rooms, and buys nasty pics on ebay. He says all men do it and I'm just insecure and should get over it. I've given him nude pics of me, he still wants to look at other women. Do All Men?

Answer 1

Not all men do. guys need to grow up about this- life is not all about sex, nor is it about pleasing themselves, or ourselves I should say- have I looked at porn in the past- yeah- was it right? no, not at all, I've cheated my wife of something that should belong only to her. I understand that I may be coming from a totally different mindset then you or your husband, but when you were at the altar, he promised to "cherish you always, til death do you part", what part of looking at porn is cherishing your wife? how is that honoring? it's understandable that he's "horny" every guys gets like that- it's in our nature as men. but it takes a real man to have self-control to not look at it and remaining faithful, because oh yeah! that's another thing that he probably promised to in your vows. Porn does affect you, no matter what you try and tell yourself, it makes you think differently, it makes you act differently, and more importantly it affects those around you as well. I don't want to get you into an argument, but if you are insecure about it, then you need to ask him to get some help. Porn is an addiction, and it's going to take outside help to get away from it. If you go to a church, try talking to pastor, or going to a Christian marriage counselor, I know that it can be an embarrassing topic to talk about, but it needs to be brought up if you want anything to get better. I'll be praying for you and I hope that things go alright if you choose to confront him. Please understand that I am not trying to ome off as judgemental, I simply have a strict viewpoint on this because I do not believe that I can have any other.

Answer 2

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Answer 3

No, all men do NOT talk dirty to women in chat rooms or buy porn pics on eBay. Tell your husband he's full of it.

Most men LOOK at porn, I think. Men are pretty visual, and like to look. That doesn't bother me a bit, and doesn't make me feel insecure. But the time spent talking to other women in chat rooms and money spent buying porn from eBay is time and money taking away from his relationship with you, and THAT'S where I draw the line.

Many women feel uncomfortable with porn, because they feel they are being compared. Usually, they aren't being compared at all -- their men just like to look. I think that, in your case, I'd feel insecure too. Nude pics of you are nothing new to him -- he can see that anytime :-) He's looking for "different."

Check his spending on the pictures and the chat rooms. If his spending on pornography is starting to become a problem, then he may actually be an addict and may need help. Howeve, porn addictions are extremely hard to break, because it affects the pleasure centers of the brain and the brain really gets hooked on it.

Good luck.

Answer 4

No not all men do. I personally have no problem with Playboy I find it more tasteful than some porn. I would have a problem with him talking dirty to women in chat rooms. I think that is unexcusable.

It's normal for a lot of men to look at porn but not everyday. It sounds like your husband may be somewhat obsessed. That can open the door to problems and is an addiction for some. I think chatting with other women talking dirty online is wrong.

My husband and I sometimes watch porn (like maybe 3 times a year). Usually it's something I pick out (I do like Jenna Jameson, LOL). But he never watches it alone, doesn't go in chat rooms and doesn't buy pictures off the internet. My husband and I work together and are together almost every second of the day and night. There isn't a huge interest in porn in our house. But we still 'date' eachother after 18 years of marriage. We go to clubs, go dancing, etc. Our lives are very busy. Perhaps your husband needs a new hobby?

Not all porn is degrading but it sounds like your husband is disrespectful of your feelings and needs.

Answer 5

There is a big difference in buying playboy and talking dirty to women in chat rooms. The guy is emotionally cheating on you and that is what you don' t like. I think a lot of guys loOK at porn and women too but the talking dirty to someone is not OK. Ask him if it is ok for you to talk dirty to men. Or go somewhere else and chat with him, so he doesn't know it is you, and then when you come home say some of the stuff he said to you. I wouldn't give a guy like that a nude of me. Who knows who he is showing it to.

Answer 6

love isn't black mail of any kind. If a woman is secure with you she wont get mad unless you watch porn every day and neglect her. If your as intimate as ever then I think its time for a heart to heart and tell her calmly it's not personal I have known some men who cant perform unless he's watched a porn flick and I know some who just watch it cause the like to see a nude women and not once made me feel as If I was competing with the flick. If the porn is on PC then I might think different. How would I know it's porn or someone your having sex with???

Answer 7

Ooh lord you've opened up a large debate now.

1. I know half of my close friends look at some kind of porn and that's both male and female.

2. Porn isn't age specific, that is, it attracts all age ranges and thats partly because of human curiosity.

3. If it's degrading to women, what about the men?

Personally I don't think it's degrading at all. I think it comes down to this. Men/Women who disrespect one another do so because they are uneducated or have never been respected themselves, not through watching a porn flic where people are acting... which is all it basically is!

I also hate the fact that people come out with this bs about it being degrading..... well if you consider it degrading you should also consider it being human nature because helloooooooooo thats what it is.

Answer 8

A lot. Most men, myself included, find the images of beautiful women to be arousing (would you want it any other way?). Equally if not more exciting are these women engaged in the act of lovemaking. To say any man (or women) is sexually deviant for this alone is wrong. If practiced in the privacy of ones home and in a discreet fashion, I see nothing wrong with it. Further to call it ''degrading and disrespectful to women'' can't be further from the truth. It is in respect and with awe that we view their form. Now as far as your husband talking dirty to women in chat rooms, this is ''over the line''. Considering you have an objection to it, he should stop immediately. Also unless you are wealthy, his indulgence in these activities shouldn't cost your family money and for him to continue this expense is wasteful to say the least (there is enough free ''porn'' on the net to last a person 10 lifetimes).

Answer 9

Yes in some way or another a man looks at porn. They are visual creatures. He is just telling you that though in order to get away with it. He should not be talking dirty to women in chat rooms that should be a big NO NO!!! That is asking for trouble. It is one thing looking at a woman he will never get in a magazine then talking to a woman in a chat room on what he wants to do with her body. Very disrespectful!!! He must be insecure in order to have to talk nasty to others in order to feel good sexually. You need to put some rules down before it goes even further.

Answer 10

I would guess that most men look at porn at one time or another, but some never do, and only some do it regularly.

A subscription to a (relatively) tasteful magazien like Playboy is one thing, but buying pictures on Ebay is questionable, and talking dirty to women is chat rooms is flat-out cheating.

Your giving him pictures of you was a great compromise, and he should be willing to reciprocate by giving up at least one of his bad habits in return - I'd suggest the Ebay pictures, since the chat room is cheating and therefore non-negotiable.