Please help...I feel like such a loner at school...???

Question

heres a little bit of info.From pre-school through 8th grade i went to the same school.i had alot of friends. then i went to a new highschool. i had 2 close friends. then one of the girls made friends and left our group. then this year (NOW IM A JUNIOR) my other friend joined a diff. bigger group also.
Today i went to the bigger group with my other friend i could kinda tell the people were wondering why i was there. but i could tell my friend really didn't want me there. i thought she would never ditch me she was asking the other girls WANNA GO TO THE MOVIES TOMORROW in front of me and didn't ask me. she acts like im not there. i dont know what to do at lunch i cant drive until november otherwise i'd go home for lunch. i talk to people a lil but im really shy and they are never longterm friends anymore.im so depressed. i have nowhere to go at lunch. i am really selfconscious in class and worry all the time what people are thinking of me. is there somethign wrong with me?

I am on the basketball team. i know people on the team i hung out with them twice and never again. they go out for lunch so i cant sit w/ them. also my friends from my old school all go to different schools and i barely see/talk to them...its been 3 years. AND the reason im friends w/ the people who ditched me is because i have no other friends.



and i don't eat lunch at school b/c i go to the library at lunch and we are not allowed to eat in there.

Answer 1

that's a painful situation to be in - I know, I've been there *hugs*. the last two years of secundary school were the worst for me too. I'd had to double a year and my best friend went ahead to the next, and then in my last year she went off to college. I got through those two years only because I discovered something to occupy my mind: reading and writing stories and going on the internet.

Find a hobby you like and that you can do alone, or go to the computer room if you have one at school.

If you want someone to chat with, mail me - nothing better than someone who knows what you're going through. There's a time difference but if chatting doesn't work, there's always email. Take care!

Answer 2

Making friends and keping them is really difficult (even adults find it hard). There's no hard and fast rule, I'm afraid. Maybe the answer is not to try to make friends. Keep doing what you like doing, e.g. basketball, reading, etc. and in time a friend might just fall into your lap. Why should you have to avoid the dinner hall because of some immature bullies? Just take a book or magazine to read as you are eating so that you won't feel self-conscious and you won't be looking round to see who's looking at you.
Hope some of this helps.

Answer 3

when i was younger, i always found it hard to understand why my parents usually only ever had friends that they became friends with in high school, not elementary. me and this other girl met in K4 and became best friends immediately, practically inseparable. then, as the years went on and we met new people, we slowly drifted apart. soon i felt like you in the big group; my friends always talked about what they did together over the weekend, and they had never asked me to go. last year, when i entered middle school, i got to meet kids from three other elementary schools in the area who all attended our school. i found other people to hang out with, who included me, and i just left my old group of friends. they didn't seem to care, and i don't care that they didn't care. we still talk and we don't fight or anything, i have a locker next to one girl and a couple of classes, and a gym class with my best friend from K4. the subject was never brought up about why we weren't as best as friends anymore.
my point is: you should find people that you get along with and share the same interests with. if you don't feel included in the group, find different friends. last year i was miserable, but this year I'm actually happy.
oh, and there's nothing wrong with you.