Parents 10th grade grades dropping fast what to do?

Question

My daughter is a great kid relatively mature, good natured, always helps when asked, and up until now 10th grade has always been a 3.25gpa+ student. This year she had 3000 texts last months, 800 min. cell time, weekends with her friends, homecoming, and now she has a 2.9gpa after promising repeatedly that she would bring her gpa back up. Now she is grounded until interems come out. What if she doesn't get a 3.25gps (my standard)? She isn't studying more than 30 min. a day even now and I feel like it should be 2hrs a day if she's struggling. It seems high school has turned into a social event instead of a stepping stone to college. We talk about future, how high school is high school and most of these kids she will never see again, she understands seems focused and then quiclkly get's another C. How long should she stay grounded, do I take away the cell phone too?, stop all extra curricular activities until she can prove she can stay focused? She wants a car too and I'm like GPA plese

Thanks alot...we talked again last night about length of time studying, possibility of tutoring where does she feel she it at, future rewards/consequences. She see the light at the end of the tunnel. She is seeing that school is getting harder and she has to focus much more to pull home the grades she did in 8th and 9th grade. Thanks and good luck to all the parents.

Answer 1

well a 2.9 isnt that bad. is she usually an A student. Don't be to hard on her that alone could make her rebel and stress out. sometimes parents want to much from there kids. It is important that she keep her grades up though. High school could easily turn into a more social thing than a learning experience. Atleast she is going.....i only went to high school for the social part of it to be honest nad now while in community college i struggle with study skills and even note taking. Maybe take her phone away for the 2 hours you want her studying or maybe a one hour and 1/2. Let he hang out with her friends but make an aggrement with her that she will be home by a decent time and spend that hour and a half studying no phone at all. she leaves hte phone with youfor that time and that should help. she wont have much else to do but studywithout contact to her friends

Answer 2

Ah, the teen years. (been there, done that) First off, I'd have a talk with her (and then the guidance counselor or a teacher who knows the school version of your daughter) to see if anything is going on. Boyfriend, not always a postive one, cyber bullying, you'd be surprised. How's she acting at home? Notice anything really odd--clothing (too much/too little), eating, sleeping, etc. Sometimes the really "good" kids (I have one and was one) can really surprise you with unexpected behaviors and issues!

Once that has been addressed (and it's quite possible nothing bad is going on, but checking is always worth it), then you can deal with the "I'd rather be a social butterfly" syndrome. From experience, I've found grounding doesn't do a thing these day. Texts, cells, facebook/myspace--you name it. Being grounded just means you can't physically be with the gang! Time to spell out a plan and have a contract between you and your child, include the school if at all possible. Ask for frequent progress reports, then if she choses to not do homework, privileges go. One item after each report, grounding stays in place. We finally had to take away books (which I am loath to do), as our daughter is happy to just read in an empty room!

This can take a loooooooooong time, depending on how well you both remain determined. Eventually, she'll get it. Sometimes we have to be more of a commando parent than usual, but no one ever said doing what is needed is fun!

Answer 3

Let's see...Who is running the family here? As responsible parental units you and your spouse should be making the rules at home! Sadly, too many teens see school as only a social place. This isn't entirely bad, as communicating with others is necessary to build one's character. If you are troubled about your childs study habits then it is time to put your foot (feet) down. I'm not saying that it is time to shut her off from the outside world, just tell her of your concern and take an interest in her schoolwork routines. It wouldn't hurt to limit her cell phone and pc time to strictly after homework is completed. Explain that this is not a punishment, but a way of helping her focus. Also, help her study for tests and such now and then. Show her that you care about her future.

Answer 4

Been there done that....take away the cell phone, the house phone, no dates, no friends, take everything. I had to do this with my son, when I found out he was skipping school. I did it for six weeks. He was mad at me for about a week then it got better, so did his grades. Plus when he was through studying, he would venture out of his room and join the rest of the family. One more thing...dinner around the table every night for the family...this is so important. My oldest two are gone from home now, but my 13 year old daughter and I share a meal every night. It is a great way to reconnect. No car, she has to bring up her grades and be responsible. Put your foot down now before it gets worse or something happens. Once she starts improving, let her go out maybe one night a week. Good Luck