How common is it now-a-days?

Question

I'm just wondering how often this happens in today's world...

How many couples let their significant other have some 'me time' after work or on the weekends?

What is your family situation? Such as no kids, 3 kids...
How long have ya'll been married?
Do you wish you would have it different... meaning that if your spouse goes out by themselves, do you wish they would stay home and do things with yourself & kids OR if they don't go out, do you wish they would get out every once in a while?

How do you think it affects the relationship?

Answer 1

You need time apart so that when you are together you have something to talk about! If you are always together it can all go stale, and you don't have room to grow as an individual.

Took me a long time to work that out, after trying to get my husband to give up all his activities to be with me.....I now know that only I am responsible for my own state of contentment and I cannot expect one other person to meet all my needs for friendship and company.

We have 2 kids and when my husband comes home from work he eats dinner with us and spends the early part of the evening with me, then watches sport when I go to bed. We have separate interests outside the home, but also joint interests.

Answer 2

Some (me) time is good but it can be taken advantage of as well. Happy hour after work on a Friday has led to more affairs then anything else other then the co-worker affair. Anyone who goes out say once a week isn't good because eventually you will meet someone you really like and before you know it you are having an affair. It's best to go out together but if you have a husband like most do he will fine a way to get out on his own. I think most wives would prefer if their husbands took more interest in their kids but husbands use the old excuse I'm tired i worked hard all day. Husbands wouldn't know a hard days work if it jump up and bit them in the a s s . We women have been working hard all our lives with the taking care of the kids to clearing to cooking to taking care of the husbands and all that is done after working an 8 hr job.

Answer 3

My husband and I are both loners to a degree and have been together for seven years... known each other since the second grade. It can get very unpleasant if we don't each have our own down time. My husband has a very stressful job. We have no kids, so when he gets home from work, I cook dinner and leave him alone. He has an hour or so to himself, as do I, and we spend the rest of the evening together in a much better mood. We have work activities or family obligations on the weekends sometimes, but we each manage to slip in some quiet time. It helps to be able to change gears, so when we are together we appreciate each other more. It is hard to miss someone if they are always underfoot! ;) My husband goes out a couple of times a month with friends and I am in the process of trying to get out a bit more myself. My husband won't admit it to me, but I am sure he would like more time at home without me there. Everyone needs time and space to breathe!

Answer 4

I generally go out one night a week just me and my friends. And he generally does the same. We do have other couples that we are friends with that have children that we go to as a family, but we all sort of do our own thing. They guys go out to the garage or go 4 wheeling and the women sit by a fire and talk or in the house and talk depending on how cold it is and the kids just run around and play amongst themselves.

Been married 9 years with 2 kids. I believe alone time is essential. I think everyone needs a day here and there for themselves.

Answer 5

My husband and i have two kids one 18 months and the other 3 months. My husband works a lot to makeup for me staying at home with the kids ( mutual decision). I know he wants to relax after he gets off of work so I try to make it easy on him by not asking much from him. He usually has one of the kids in an effort to help me out. We spend time as a family until the kids go to bed or atleast the older one. Our daughter still isn't on a good sleep schedule. If he wants to go to the neighbors for a few I let him, but he rather me come with. I let him play a video game if he wants. He has a pretty relaxed job so its like he gets to hang out with the guys at work when they are on a smoke break or just goof off for a minute. So he usually likes to spend time together since we don't get that much. We both enjoy each others company and if one of us wants a minute to themselves the other is happy to let them have it. So I believe it keeps our relationship very good, because we both know that we do a lot for each other and know that we need help or a break once in a while. We do wish that we could get out more with out the kids though for a date night or something. We are working on that.

Answer 6

Married, together for 8 years, on our second child. I am not the type to keep my husband in doors just because I expect him to always be with me and our child. He is responsible and takes care of us well. If he wants to be out a few hours with his buddies I have no problem with it. The only thing I expect is to know his whereabouts and what time I should expect him to come home. I am more relax at home with our child knowing that my husband is okay and alive. I expect a call or a text from him if he is to be out longer just so I won't worry so much. He has his time and I have mine. Although he does go out more then I do but it only averages probably once every other weekend. We spend a lot of family time together and it all evens out well.

Answer 7

We both have me time -- not every weekend or every day, but we both get it. I don't interfere with his time and he doesn't with mine. We also have a "run away weekend" once a year. We can each go away with friends or alone for a weekend of our choice. He goes racing with the boys, and I go to a nice resort/ spa for a weekend.

I think it's critical to a relationship to be able to be an independent person as well as one half of a couple. You can't be the best spouse/ parent unless you are the best you first.

We have been married for 8 years, and have 4 kids.

Answer 8

Not married yet, but we have discussed this aspect of our relationship and actually do follow it.....

My fiance and I live together and have no kids. We have agreed that we have a "Date night" once a week. We use that night to leave cell phones at home and just concentrate on us-whether we go to dinner or just go for a walk around the park. We have discussed that when we do have kids, of course a cell phone will be taken with at that point, but only answered for the kids and no one else. That was something my parents did when I was a kid and that not only helped their relationship continue to grow-but it also allowed me to see that my parents did love eachother and I want my kids to see that as well.

As for "alone time" or Girl's/Guy's night, we have agreed to make that a once a month thing. He goes out with all his buddies one night, and I meet up with my girls that night-but at the end of the night-we always go home to eachother. Providing that time apart allows you to still keep your other relationships in good condition. Friends and family relations are important to have as well. And of course there is the occasional evening he will call me after work and tell me that he is stopping at the bar with a couple co-workers for a much deserved happy hour...or I call him. But usually then-we will invite the other out to join in the happy hour festivities.

I am completely satisfied with how my fiance and I view quality time together and alone or with friends. We both cherish not only our relationship, but other relationships as well and realize that it takes work and time to make them all work.

Answer 9

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Answer 10

I love it that my hubby golfs on the weekends, he also sets up time for us. I like to shop on sat while he golfs, we have our away time from each other and its great. I have a 3yr old son and he goes with me shopping. Through the week I hit the gym and hubby keeps our son. We have it worked out pretty well and it works for us. We are both happy. He has guy friends and once or twice a month they go shoot pool on friday nights I have girls night out once or twice a month and we do movie and a dessert. Its great we have time away but we make sure we still have time together.