I have been married for a long time when the big announcement came that he was done. Of course I wish things would have been different but he was abusive and I need to move on with my life. Not necessarily with a new man but at least past him. It hurts so much and I started out of course wanting to see him and talk to him as much as I can. He does disrespect me and plays games and still wants to control me and my life so I know I have to get over this. How can I be sure that my heart has moved on and I am REALLY ready to go on with a new great life?
2007-10-23 05:58:35 · 9 answers · asked by just me 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Time to stop listening to your heart and begin to listen to your mind. He is abusive and obviously was not worthy of you as he now stated he is done. Part of the control, he had the last say. Get into a support group that will help you focus and see how much better you will be if you move on. It is never easy to end a relationship, don't do it alone, get love from friends and family. Best of luck to you!
2007-10-23 06:06:13 · answer #1 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You allow yourself to move on. First, forgive him (to yourself of course) for all the bad things he did during the marriage, then forgive yourself for allowing them to happen. Take all the bad feelings and put them down. I was married for 23 years, my ex and I had some good times and some bad times. I was crushed when he picked a "friend" over me. I was angry, hurt, confused and still in love. I thought that I was a strong woman, so why would I let it happen. The answer was because I was a strong woman. Take a deep breath...go to eharmony and get yourself someone who you will be compatible with. You are not alone, my dear, you are free!!
Good Luck!
2007-10-23 18:50:09 · answer #2 · answered by Patti 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First you have to cut yourself off from him for good. No phone calls, no letters, no visits and no emails. He was bad for you and it is time to move on.
Begin by getting back into a social life, even if that means having lunch with girlfriends, shopping expeditions or just going to a movie. You have to realize that you are better off now than you were with him.
As for knowing your heart is ready, when you realize that being alone is better than being with someone abusive then your heart is ready for a new love.
Good Luck
2007-10-23 13:17:34 · answer #3 · answered by mn lady 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your just stuck in routine he has been all you have known for a while. Time is the only thing that will help you move on and maybe getting a hobby like joining a gym, curves or involved more with family,stay around people who love you so you can build your self back up
2007-10-23 13:12:47 · answer #4 · answered by juv 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes the heart learns slowly what the mind is quick to know......(misquoted poem) You have to hang in there and realize that you are as important of a person as any that you are more important in your life than anyone especially someone that disrespects you. It is hard and it hurts but the sooner you stop letting him pull your strings the sooner you can have a better life than one that is controlled by someone who only has his best interest at heart, not yours. Love yourself and good luck....S
2007-10-23 13:17:38 · answer #5 · answered by scsspace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, for your own good - don't wait til the heart is ready - you move on now - and the heart will follow. You don't need to be controlled or abused - please do the right thing and let him go!
2007-10-23 13:04:29 · answer #6 · answered by wild_orchid_tx36 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best way to get over a man is to get under a new one!!!
2007-10-23 13:01:53 · answer #7 · answered by FRECKLES 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just have to tell yourself eveymorning and eveynight that your over him, and the day you dont think about him is the day youll truly be over him
2007-10-23 13:01:58 · answer #8 · answered by brina 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you will know when you no longer think of him...but if you need help getting to that point, involve yourself in new activities, make new friends, start going out more, etc...
2007-10-23 13:07:57 · answer #9 · answered by eliza l 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋