What are the signs of emotional abuse?

Question

How do I recognise it?

I've been going out with this guy, for nearly 2 years, but it's a part time relationship because of long distance...so, at the moment, I see he still tries to be on his "best behaviour" with me. We're not living together, yet, but he wants to in future.

So I need to know...what are the signs? What are they, exactly, because I am confused? I don't know if it's him or me.

This emotional/mind playing game thing that he does...it is subtle...for now. But how do I recognise the signs now? Before it's too late.

Answer 1

You don't know what your talking about. How do you know. Whatever! Those are subtle comments of emotional abuse. saying things that keep you from expressing your feelings on any issue. Belittling comments made at you in public are another way. You mentioned "best behavior" He could act as though y'all are the perfect couple treat you fine only in public. Could emotional become physical?

Answer 2

Emotional abusers care only about themselves and what they want. They exert a lot of control in subtle and not so subtle ways. One thing I notice is that most of what they say is about themselves--I this and I that and if they talk about someone else--it is often criticism or "they should do that MY way" Or "I could have told so and so that his idea would never work" and that kind of thing.
They build themselves up and tear down others.
They will change the subject back to themselves or what they are interested in, even if you bring up a subject important to you, they'll guide the conversation around to what they want to talk about. Be careful of anyone who does not seem to respect you and your thoughts as something worthy. As in, "I don't know why you would think that, that's just crazy!" Someone can think your idea is crazy and still respect you and discuss it with you.
Name calling is also something I've noticed. Labels or so and so is an idiot, that group is just a bunch of commies, that church is full of hypocrites, etc.
Watch out for anyone who treats/talks about parents and siblings very badly. Sure some have bad people in the family-but is it constant and un-deserved?
Live well and do good!

Answer 3

You are already displaying one of the signs. One thing that abused women do, is start distrusting their instincts. They start wondering if they are crazy. Unless you have some mental disorder, you aren't crazy! Trust yourself!
If you are asking this question, I can already guess that things have happened and you are pretty sure there is abuse. The other thing women do, is we make excuses, we deny things because we want so badly for this man to be "the man," or we want so desperately for the relationship to work out. Don't make that mistake.
Anyone that lies, hides things, omits things, plays mind games, makes you feel bad about yourself, says things to hurt you purposefully, makes himself feel better by making you feel worse etc.., is abusive.

Answer 4

When I think of emotional abuse I think of being mislead into certain types of thought. You may think one think yet he finds a way to prey on your train of thought by telling you what you want to here to try to cover up what he may be doing just to keep from telling you what he is really up to. I think this could be some kind of mild sign of emotional abuse because you feel kind of mislead not knowing what he really feels. I think it would be much healthier for you to approach your mate with this issue that you have so you could at least have peace of mind knowing that you did ask. Even if he says things you might not want to hear you can free your mind from mindless assumptions that you have about him. We women tend to think intuitively we are the only creatures on this planet that do that. Most of the time our intuition is right and we tend to follow it. Just talk to him about your feelings you will feel a whole lot better. :)

Answer 5

signs of emotional are different for people everyone has different ways to cope to what is sounds like here is that you are stressed and really confused but if you let it beat you you will fell worse. if you have a talk with him and confront him about the mind games it will probably ring a bell in his head

Answer 6

Be greater particular with the "no longer letting your spouse fulfill any wish and not letting her be chuffed" clause. that is a large number of issues. what's your wish: Being a nurse, instructor, engineer OR being a stripper that does "tricks" on the area? what's "chuffed" to you: occurring missionary journeys to offer shoes to poor toddlers in third international countries OR identifying to purchase up each and every Jimmy Choo ever created along with his paycheck? BE particular!

Answer 7

First of all, you do not move in with someone that you really don't know that well.

Is he trying to control you? Does he put you down? Does he try to make you feel you are so lucky to have him and you probably would never find anyone else or anyone better?

Take your time. It is so much easier not to start something than it is to avoid it altogether.