how do I get her to understand she can do so much better than him. She only sees him like once a week and he always makes her cry. I can't stand to see her hurt anymore HELP!!!!
2007-10-22 12:34:16 · 15 answers · asked by kbtinker78 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Seeing your sister suffer like this is a very excruciating thing.
Although you may want to help her, it is she, who will have to make all the decisions regarding the current relationship, she's entangled in.
I'm sure, she is a very fragile person right now.
Even though this man is a jerk, he is still her husband & she is going to have to take a stand against ignorance.
Your job is to be patient with her & not force your ideas on her.
2007-10-22 12:54:02 · answer #1 · answered by Sustagurl2 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's an awful situation :( I'm guessing she must love (or thinks she loves him) to stay in that situation. I would just try to sit her down and try talking to her as her sister -- it's a touchy subject and sometimes people react the wrong way because they feel like they're being lectured/attacked/etc.
I'm sure on some level she knows it's a bad situation, so as her sister, just talk it out-- let her know that you're worried about her and that you want her to be happy and have wonderful things, all of that. Let her know that she could be with someone who wants to spend time with her, doesn't maker her cry, wants her to be happy (not to mention all of this in a normal relationship, let alone a marriage!) some of those things missing should be a given in a marriage.
Most of all let her know that you love her and that she can turn to you if she needs you. If anything it might help her open up or feel like she can go to you for help when she's ready.
Good luck!
2007-10-22 12:40:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are not married! It doesn't matter what some stupid pieces of paper might say, but that is not a relationship and that is not marriage.
Tell her that if she's going to continue to let him play her for a fool with no love and respect, then she will continue to have a miserable wasted life crying.
She could also decide to act like a lady with her self respect, pride, dignity and value. Then immediately file for divorce and begin to enjoy life so she will eventually meet a real man, then she will be making an excellent decision.
2007-10-22 12:46:40 · answer #3 · answered by Very Honest 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love does not bend with the remover to remove. When a woman loves a man, she sees something in him that lures her like a moth to the flame. All you can do is be there to listen. You can't change her mind about him. If her mind is made up, she only has eyes for him. It doesn't matter to her that she can do better. He is what she wants. If he is abusive physically, then by all means continue to do everything you can do to persuade her to get out.
2007-10-22 12:39:09 · answer #4 · answered by JUJUBABE 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a friend in the same situation... They are married. They have two kids. She lives with her mom and step dad with the kids... he lives who knows where.. doing who knows what...
well, i have learned that nothing will make her change her mind. she has to want it for herself - not because others advised her what to do... at least she doesn't have to see the jerk everyday.... she has peace 6 days a week. LOL
2007-10-22 13:16:31 · answer #5 · answered by Miss Kelly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to wake up and smell the coffee. Life is to short to waste it being miserable. How can they be married and not living together?
She needs to figure out what she wants. If she enjoys the drama and being miserable then she is going to continue torturing herself with this relationship.
If she feels it is worth fighting for then she needs to tell him how she feels and find out if it is even worth it to keep the relationship going.
I hate to hear someone is married to a jerk, but love is blind.
I hope she is able to work something out. All you can do is support her choices and love her.
2007-10-22 12:38:29 · answer #6 · answered by mamabee 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Seriously,dun think anyone can help unless she sees the light herself.In relationship,it's difficult to pass judgements unless the parties reveal more.Even if you know more,there may still be some things that you may not know.
2007-10-22 12:42:01 · answer #7 · answered by Lonelycity 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit her down, get out a pen and blank sheet of paper. Draw a line that divides the paper vertically in 1/2. Pros of keeping/staying with him on one side, cons of keeping/staying with him........Hopefully, in the daylight, she will see it in black and white what the right decision is.
2007-10-22 12:46:12 · answer #8 · answered by Kelly773 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should leave it up to her. Sadly, it's her decision and telling her what a jerk he is might end up causing a rift between you two if she decides to stay with him.
you can tell her that but I wouldn't push it by telling her it all the time. etc.
In the end though, it's her choice.
2007-10-22 12:38:31 · answer #9 · answered by juliettavirgo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get her to know that she can find someone better. Arrange her to meet somebody to treat her in a good way so she can tell the difference so she can open her eyes.
2007-10-22 12:48:11 · answer #10 · answered by mar g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋