My friend who seems as "normal" as can be, told me once that she attacked her husband after they had a huge arguement. Attacked as in punching him. She is 5'2 and weighs 125lb, her husband is 6'2 and is a pretty big guy. He has bever layed a finger on her. Well...last night she told me again that she got angry at him after an arguement and started to punch him, not in the face but on his back or wherever. She kind of laughed about it and said it has happened a few times. She says he gets her so mad that she can't control it, but then it blows over. What do you think?? In the back of my mind I couldn't help but think she needs anger management. She was never abused or hit and had a great upbringing. But I feel bad for her husband. If he was the one punching her, i'm sure it would not sit well with her or anyone for that matter. I dont think he hurts physically, but mentally and emotionally, it must start to get to him if its happened more then once. What do you think?
2007-10-22 12:18:49 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hats off to him that he hasn't hit her back...sounds to me that he is a true gentleman. I agree with you that she is in the wrong.
p.s. I used to love the young Sean Connery in the old James Bond movies, until I saw him on The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, and I lost all respect for him when he said ''if a woman is fighting you, I believe a man has the right to slap her". I disagree...the man only has to grab the arms of the woman and hold her away from him...and that could be easily done by this man who is a big guy and a whole foot taller than she is.
2007-10-22 13:27:13 · answer #1 · answered by birdtennis 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is definitely spousal abuse. It doesn't matter which gender acts out on the other--abuse is abuse. She should certainly start going to counseling for her anger management issues and they may need to go to couple's counseling. Nobody ever has the right to lay a hand on another person!
She is very immature and I am surprised she is married. If she is not mature enough to discuss serious topics (i.e. whatever was making her angry in the first place) with words, then she never should have entered this relationship to begin with!
2007-10-22 19:27:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yea this is spousal abuse and your right if the shoe were on the other foot it woulda done hit the fan, she needs something wondefr how she would feel if he hauled off and hit her back? wonder if she would think he were abusing her?
who is next the dog that cant fight back or the baby that is helpless and crying cause it needs something? Doesnt matter if it doesnt hurt him physically even when a man is wailing on ya it hurts but not like ya think its emotional and she is buiding a wall around him instead of a bridge between them. They both need theropy to stop the insanity this realationship is leading to, approach her with the question see if she gets it.
2007-10-22 19:35:20 · answer #3 · answered by pinkleo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on his point of view. If he doesn't feel threatened or abused, then you as a friend should not worry too much. He may even enjoy it to some extent. You know the fine line between pain and pleasure. Anyway, unless he feels it is abuse or needs help there is very little you can do. For a lot of married couples this is normal behavour, unfortunately, as long as they have a healthy relationship otherwise, there is probably very little to worry about.
2007-10-22 19:39:45 · answer #4 · answered by Cliff R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like abuse to me. For some they might not think so because it is the female doing the abusing. But wether it is the male or female doing physical, emotional, or mental harm to their spouse is abuse. She might benifit from anger managment to find a different outlet than attacking her spouse. I can't believe she thinks that it is funny.
2007-10-22 19:56:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes that is spousal abuse, so it has serious repercussions, even if they are married and she takes it all in good fun and all doesn't mean it doesn't effect him, he is taking advantage of the fact he has never laid a hand on her...just imagine though if the tables were to turn....we'd see a huge stink about it right away...I don't see how its any different.
2007-10-22 19:25:08 · answer #6 · answered by caminolargo76 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs help in a bad way!! It doesn't matter if she is smaller, she is the agressor and he could press charges on her if he wants to--they definetly need counseling and if she want to stay in the marriage, she needs some anger management classes!! he seems like a nice guy, she's so lucky he doesn't haul off and whip her ***!!!!!!
2007-10-22 19:48:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is definitely abuse. Physical abuse, emotional abuse and mental abuse. Suggest that she gets help. There is nothing funny about abuse in any form. Do they have children, and if so are they safe from her and safe from seeing this?
2007-10-22 19:24:13 · answer #8 · answered by Len 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Either way, it's abuse. She needs anger management help.
2007-10-22 19:35:39 · answer #9 · answered by Kelly773 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, that is very serious..No one should be hitting at all. If it is that serious to hit, they should leave each other..It is a good thing that he is not hitting her because it he would she'd be hurt and ready to call the police....Your Friend Is Wrong....
2007-10-22 19:24:32 · answer #10 · answered by Alisha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋