I have been with my husband for 8 years (married for 3). Recently I reconnected with an old friend on MySpace. At first we were just sending e-mails then it went to phone calls where we realized that we only lived 4 houses away from one another. I hooked up with him one day and we went for a ride. Well, one thing led to another and we ended up at his house. He makes me feel like I've never felt before. I think I'm falling in love with him. I hate to do this to my husband but he's all I can think about.
2007-10-22 06:46:05 · 61 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I hate to say this, but the grass is greener on the other side.
The costs are phenomenal, but it is worth the jump, or at least was in my experience.
I lost my house, which was almost paid for, a successful business, my livelihood, and my sanity, however.
I was with my gf for over 15 years before marrying - only to take on a very long divorce some 2 years later.
My current partner had been married for 22 years, and jumped.
Been together now nearly six years and we couldn't be happier. We are broke, have little if any future, but I wouldn't give her up for the world.
Follow your heart, and protect your feet.
It is a painful path that you have to walk, but it is worth the walk.
2007-10-22 07:03:44 · answer #1 · answered by Mike D 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
No, the grass is not greener. See, you falling for the 80/20 rule. You are in relationship right which is about 80 percent because you are not getting what you want. Without talking to your husband about what you want in the relationship. You seeing this old flame you now have 20 percent for what he makes you feel. Would you give up 80 dollars for 20? You married your husband and have given him 8 yrs of your life and all of a sudden this old friend makes you feel like never before. What does he make you feel like? A woman? Giving yourself to some one else with out telling your spouse is a very selfish thing to do.
2007-10-22 06:58:01 · answer #2 · answered by Kaya M 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is a song by a legendary soul singer named Wilson Pickett. He sings a song called "Don't let the green grass fool you.
If your husband is taking care of family like he should , then the grass is green at home. Be happy with what you got.
That grass cross the fence looks green but its not. Its appealing because you think you are missing something . That grass will soon begin to turn brown .The other guy know what you are capable of doing .He wants what he can get from you. When he finds someone more suitable as a mate or companion , you'll be out of the picture.
You say you hate to do that to your husband , well you gonna be sorry oneday.
2007-10-22 12:54:45 · answer #3 · answered by Thunder 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well my dear, it sounds like you found yourself a "jump off" and nothing more. It doesn't appear that you are unhappy in your marriage but maybe bored. This reconnection stirred up things that your husband or you may have neglected. Accept it for what it was...good sex! Good sex will make you "feel like your falling in love" when actually you are loving the sex!Ask yourself why this hadn't happen in the past? And if it did, what were the reasons you and your friend didn't pursue it further.
Now if you are truly unhappy with your marriage then be honest with your husband. Give your marriage a second chance. If it still doesn't work then you might discuss divorce. Never leave a man for a man. It sounds exciting and some relationships last. However, most relationships don't.
Until next time, enjoy the "jump off". Good luck!
2007-10-22 06:59:03 · answer #4 · answered by beafoxx1 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, I have been there recently myself. I, however, wasn't tempted with the opportunity due to the fact that we live 400 miles apart. The everyday life of a marriage can sometimes seem mundane and predictable and what woman doesn't want to escape that sometimes? When I look at other husbands and wives and think, man I wish my husband were more like that, I also try to look at my husband and find something that the other wives are wishing their husband had...and most of the time I can. I wish my husband were more openly affectionate and loving like my sister's husband, but she wishes her husband were more sensitive and interested in her hobbies the way my husband is. So, while the grass definitely looks greener at times, I am sure there are weeds on that side of the fence too.
2007-10-22 06:57:37 · answer #5 · answered by ¤¤Je§§ica¤¤ 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
In this day of age it is really rare to see a married couple actually last simply because temptation is so much easier than it used to be. Now, most people don't give a damn if they are the other person of destroy a relationship or marriage. For those who provoke it, remember that karma is a b****. The grass might be greener when it's new, but just wait till the heat kicks in, the grass will be dead and you will be left with nothing.
2007-10-22 07:06:10 · answer #6 · answered by coby300 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You didn't tell us if your neighbor was married or attached. The grass is rarely greener. You are just bored and may be about to lose both men if your husband finds out AND the other guy is only playing around, as single men do!! You are probably flattering yourself that 2 men are interested in you. You could end up feeling like a fool. Good luck.
2007-10-22 06:56:48 · answer #7 · answered by ? 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No...the grass only appears greener until you go there permanently. Then it is just like all other grass. This guy is a new thing to you and of course he seems great and exciting. But remember... 8 years down the road... you will be looking again for that excitement that sort of fizzled over the years.
Focus on your own marriage.... make it exciting. Go on dates, surprise him with a card or a cute poem. Cook a special dinner and eat it by candlelight. Rekindle the romance! Don't go looking for it elsewhere. Believe me...the grass is greener? It's just a saying.
2007-10-22 06:56:11 · answer #8 · answered by Kim 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just by you going on My Space indicates you were bored and already looking for some excitement, bad frame of mind to make any rational decision. You just might be letting this excitement get in the way of thinking clearly. You say he makes you feel like you never have felt before, he might not look at this as much as you do. First of all, any guy who takes an already married woman seriously is not too smart of a guy. Sorry, you have to come down from that cloud and see the high risks you are taking in loseing your marriage.
2007-10-22 07:21:40 · answer #9 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Obviously you don't "hate" to do this to your husband enough or else you wouldn't be doing it - simple as that. The grass always SEEMS greener in the BEGINNING and then when the infatuation wears off you will eventually be back in the same spot you are with your husband. You are blinded by INFATUATION right now. How sad that you will constantly chase after this endless validation from other men instead of honoring the commitment you made.
2007-10-22 07:07:57 · answer #10 · answered by ♥Care♥ mommy 2 my boys 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋