What should I do about my husband not getting me anything for my birthday. Every birthday he had I've given him parties with friends, gifts,cakes and cook outs. In return he has given me nothing no cards, money, cakes, eating out, nothing. We've been married 11 years and out of the 11 he has done 2 things cake and a cookout that I had to cook.
2007-10-22 05:59:44 · 40 answers · asked by Lon-Lon 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Perhaps he forgot. Did you ask him why he couldn't even get you a card?
2007-10-22 06:02:10 · answer #1 · answered by CC 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yep, I know the feeling. I have cut way back on what I do for his birthday. I acknowledge it and wish him a happy day. Perhaps a small gift, but nothing extravagant.
I have decided that every day is more important than one special day. What each day is like is up to me. No one can make me feel one way or another - just me. I'm not completely there, hence the small token on his birthday. If I want a big do on my birthday, I arrange something with my friends and let it at that.
2007-10-22 06:08:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him about it. Tell him it hurts your feelings and you need him to care about your birthday. Some men are just insensitive about this. It doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't love you or care about you. Maybe he just doesn't realize how important this is to you. My dad is the exact same way to my mom. They have been married almost 30 years and have the best marriage I have ever seen. They will also both agree that they have a near perfect marriage. I think the birthday thing has bothered my mom a little over the years, but she sees all his good qualities and decided the birthdays don't matter that much. Also, she doesn't make a big deal about his birthdays now, either. This doesn't have to be a big deal/marriage destroyer, but if it bothers you, talk about it and work it out.
2007-10-22 06:08:25 · answer #3 · answered by Amy27 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree. Don't even acknowledge his birthday when it arrives. He has received so much from you in the past he will feel horrible when there is absolutely nothing. Sometimes that is what it takes to wake a person up. Sounds like you are a doormat that gives and he is an a.s.s. that takes. Stop doing that! Stand up and tell him you will no longer take care of him, he is able to do it on his own so step up! That is bull that he doesn't even get you a card. Don't do a thing for his birthday.....that will make him feel what you feel every year. Tell us when your birthday is and we will all send you a happy birthday message!!
2007-10-22 06:10:43 · answer #4 · answered by Paula D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah my husband did absolutely nothing for me this year either it was back in August and I still get upset when I think about it. He has always done something for the past 5 years we've been together. I said to him before I left for school in the morning, "aren't you going to wish me a happy birthday"? His reply was, "oh it's your birthday well happy birthday". And that was the end of that, I am all upset again just thinking about it.
2007-10-22 06:04:41 · answer #5 · answered by lucy diamond 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't expect nothing if he hasn't done it before, this is what you do. You buy you a birthday card, mail it to yourself. You and some friends go out and celebrate your own birthday, don't depend your husband. And you should do something big and special for your birthday every year. Maybe you treat your husband they way he treated your birthday, meanig stop the parties for him. Because he don't appreciate what you do him.
2007-10-22 06:08:14 · answer #6 · answered by Teah 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My birthday came and went a few days ago without much happening. Luckily, I get treated pretty well by my gf and family the other 364 days of the year.
Usually, birthdays are not as important to guys as they are to girls. I learned that when my mom makes a big production of b-days, and I could care less. To me its another day.
Does your boyfriend treat you well the rest of the year? That is an important question. If he does- let him know it is important to you, and if he is right by you, he will try to do better
2007-10-22 06:07:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him everything that you have said here, then ask him WHY he doesn't wish to honor your birthday. Jehovah's Witnesses don't acknowlege birthdays (or other holidays), so there are some others who don't do this. But unless he comes up with a valid response, don't acknowlege his birthday again. Question - what about your wedding anniversary?
2007-10-22 06:05:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like you need to go out with your friends on your birthday. On the night of your birthday tell him "BYE, my friends are taking me out for my birthday!" See what he says, if not a good responce then what you do is buy yourself a birthday card and make it from him tell him "oh thank you for my birthday card!" See what he does. if he says "I didn't get you a card then you say WHY NOT!!! and go from there. Oh and do nothing for him and get him nothing on his birthday and even better, go out with your friends on HIS birthday and leave him at home.
2007-10-22 06:13:50 · answer #9 · answered by FYI 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We usually go out for dinner wherever I want. But the one thing I really want he won't give. I just want him to wish me happy birthday. Dinner is not as important to me as hearing him say the words and knowing he remembered. He forgot last year.
2007-10-22 06:08:47 · answer #10 · answered by ziggy_brat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tonight, as he walks in the door, hand him the baby. As you walk out, dressed to the 9s, say "Going out to celebrate my birthday, hon." Leave. Party. Come home happy. Resume life the next day. Drop it after that.
2007-10-22 06:06:40 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋