Last night my husband wakes up to change our son becuse I was too tired I haven't slept for longer than an hour a day so when I woke up after him he calls me worthless and says I do everything half way. Plus he tried to kick me out earlier in the day and keep me away from our only child is a month old what can I do because this is making me very depressed and I can't be like that I have to take care of my child.
2007-10-22 04:17:41 · 22 answers · asked by stormieford 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Was his behavior like this prior to your pregnancy or the birth of your son, or is this new behavior? Things change dramatically with the birth of a child. Even the strongest of strong relationship undergo enormous strain. Hormonally and physically you are exhausted, and he truely will never understand that. He is a new father, and probably has anxiety and is not sure if he's doing a good job or not and is taking out his frusterations on you. Either way, his behavior is totally unacceptable. Try not to get depressed, PPD usually doesn't happen right away, sometimes it wont even start until six weeks after the baby is born. And then Bam, its there and its a horrible experience. Just surround yourself with loving supportive people, friends and family that want to be helpful and kind to you. Hopefully your husband is going through a phase, and this is not his normal day to day personality. Best wishes.
2007-10-22 04:24:47 · answer #1 · answered by Brittney 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Was he a jerk when you married him or is the stress or the baby have him acting this way? Honestly, I think the problem is a lack of communication/responsibilities between you two. I believe you are probably doing all the work with the baby and he may not be doing none or little at all. He's so use of you doing everything that maybe the one time that he has to do something, he gets upset and calls you names because he didn't want to do it. You may need to stress the point that you are tired and you need some help with the baby so you can get at least a good three hours of sleep. It's not right that he calls you names and tried to kick you out of the home. This attitude will keep going if it's not stopped. He seems to have a temper problem as well as he do not know how to deal with stress. If talking to him doesn't work, do you have family you can stay with for a month or two until things are worked out? That might be the best thing.
2007-10-22 04:37:03 · answer #2 · answered by bitterly_sweetness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seek counselling but it sounds like neither of you is very mature. Having a baby is a lot of work but why have you only gotten " an hour a day" ? I have a child and though he is ten, I remember all to well the stresses of raising a baby but it never included a one hour sleep day.
For the record (because I know some women will wonder) I was the one who raised my son, I fed him, changed him and took care of him far more than my now ex wife and have raised him alone for 6 yrs now- he is ten.
You guys both need to grow up and get help.
No man should call a woman names, but everyone says things in the heat of the moment. Why are so many taking her side while only a few of us are saying both need help? We dont know the whole story. Is she really just a lazy bum or is he a loser or is the situation even more gray? Don't just assume she is the innocent victim.
2007-10-22 04:30:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello,, the dumb *** is just a punk that has no sense of what he is going. He did not know what planting that seed in you was going to do to his life and does not care about yours either. You gotta get some sleep before you get sick and can't function as a mother. A 1 month old is very "demanding" not for the remote to watch sports or for the keys to go partying with old friends but for everything in life!! the sooner you get your husband to grow up the better, but it ain't easy to wait for the change and it might never happen,, so you must decide how much crap you can put up with and make life worth living. You sleep when the baby sleeps and not watch some TV show. This happens for a few more months until the child becomes use to sleep patterns. Don't get knocked up again too soon or the pattern will never change for hubbies crying.
2007-10-22 04:31:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have been there (without a child), but none the less I have been there. Since you are married I would suggest talking to him about it and going to counseling. I was not married, but it was a 7 year relationship of pure hell. Name calling is not acceptable! Is this the first time he has done it? Maybe the stress and lack of sleep due to the new baby is causing the tension between you. Just talk to him about it and let him know how you are feeling. Good luck!
2007-10-22 04:24:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well to be honest if he is your ex husband and the divorce is already final...you should have cut that tie a long time ago. If there are no kids involved and the two of you don't have to continue anything that had something to do with your marriage between you then I would cut off all ties. Still be friends and nice to one another I suppose but don't keep that baggage hanging around. Free yourself from this......I always like to remind myself You are not your past. If you keep stuff like this "phone plan" around you will continue to be your past and not move forward with your life.
2016-05-24 04:05:44 · answer #6 · answered by freeda 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're telling us everything, the guy is a pos and you should find suitable accomodations elsewhere. If it isn't feasible right now, make it feasible. Get a job, some day care, a new place to live, and move the heck out. Neither you, nor your little one, should be in an abusive environment.
2007-10-22 04:23:32 · answer #7 · answered by Scott K 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to stay level headed to care for your child. Your issues with him doesn't have anything to do with the child. Keep in mind all the things that make you a good mom. I was in the same situation with my husband. If you want to email me thats fine I may have other advice you need.
2007-10-22 04:37:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Having a baby is Lot's of work if your partner does not help it can become very stressful
you need to have areal talk to your partner with out accusing just talk about yourself and how you feel
seeking a professional is always a plus
Remember the power of prayer God can turn any thing around
2007-10-22 04:24:16 · answer #9 · answered by mmmkay_us 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your child should be your main concern. If he is willing to throw you out over something silly then you need a plan to put you and your baby in a safe place.
Try to get him to see a marriage counselor with you and if he won't you might want to think about leaving. Plus, make sure you get your rest. You can't be good for your baby if you are exhausted. Get some help from familoy or friends.
Good Luck
2007-10-22 04:23:11 · answer #10 · answered by mn lady 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋