have been off/on for 6 years with my boyfriend...we've never lived together, he has his own home...he has always talked of us having a baby together...well i'm pregnant...i've lost my job and have 2 kids already, have had to apply for income support...benefits agency say the law is you cant have a boyfriends sleep over and claim a benefit...and have sent me CSA papers as i dont live with the father of baby...heres where i need the help....he used to stay over about half the week when i was working....ive had to stop that....he wants to continue says 'no one will find out'....doesnt wash with me, have stuck to what the benefits agency said...he also doesnt want me to tell the CSA that i know where he lives...says he will sort me out just between the 2 of us...again doesnt wash with me...i'm not teling lies to either agency....i never even knew he had this side to him...i'm shocked,quite distressed and upset about his attitude..this isnt how babies are brought into the world..any advice?
2007-10-22 02:41:56 · 5 answers · asked by littlemisssunshine 1 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
Take the high road and be honest with the agency and follow the rules. Sounds like the boyfriend is shirking responsibility now that he is faced with being a father. You will probably be raising this baby without much help or support from him. Make sure everything is taken care of legally and above board. When immature people are faced with spending money to make things right or taking responsibility they often balk at the prospect. Better to find out now rather than later. Good luck.
2007-10-22 02:53:06 · answer #1 · answered by Diane M 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like there is only one person of concern to him....and it isnt you
By the way....Just in case you dont know....If you tell CSA/income support he gives you cash..they will deduct off your benefit
If you tell them he gives you nothing they will chase him....but CSA chasing is like watching paint dry
As for staying over....stick to your grounds because most fraud is found out by someone grassing and when it happens to you he will be no where to be found and you will be paying back all the benefit and facing a criminal prosecution
If he wants to be with you that much why cant you stay at his sometimes?
Im glad you are seeing his true colours...Good luck with your choices m8
2007-10-22 14:37:38 · answer #2 · answered by stormydays 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just stick with your high level of integrity love. I feel so sorry for you. If you cheat the authorities, someone will be pleased to report you. Good luck!
2007-10-22 02:48:24 · answer #3 · answered by resignedtolife 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Whoa slow down, these things can (past disasters)be built on.Try not to worry.
2007-10-22 03:03:52 · answer #4 · answered by godbar 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sort your and the kids life out!!!! dont think about him first. you can meet him whenever without sleepovers and that he has to pay for his children is normal too. so if he doesn like it then he is no good anyway.
2007-10-22 03:13:23 · answer #5 · answered by martyn s 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋