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Let me tell you something about me.

I am very concerned about the way my friends behave with me/treat me. I make quick decisions, so if i feel that any of my friends is doing anything wrong with me then i just break the relation right there.
No more confusion. That's the way,i am
I don't let my friends make multiple mistakes. One big mistake or two & you're gone & i usually don't take a backward step.

But now i have one girl in my life (right now the best friend) which is making mistake after mistake & i am letting it go everytime.
I don't know why. I am forgiving her everytime. Though she's good but she does lots of things that i don't like.It seems to me that i just don't want to leave her.
That's very un-like my character.

I have never shown that much patience ever in my little life so far in any form of relation especially with my friends.

What's going on with me?

2007-10-21 21:15:35 · 16 answers · asked by The Great Montitude 7 in Social Science Psychology

Mellisa - I don't feel so great ( feel good of course)when i am with her but still i don't want to lose her.

2007-10-21 21:24:16 · update #1

Hunnie - Good answer.
My problem is only with 'INTENTIONAL MISTAKES'.
Yes, i always forgive my friends when the mistake is 'UN-INTENTIONAL'

Yes,i do think about her a lot & i am also very much concerned with what she thinks about me.

2007-10-21 21:37:03 · update #2

16 answers

Not being dependent on other people routinely just means you are probably very stable emotionally. Hence when someone does something you disagree with - you can just move on with life without them. You are fine being alone.

BUT

If you have fallen in love with one person... and you aren't happy with them any longer and they keep disappointing you, and you only forgive them to keep them around: you are probably more in love with not being alone again than you are with actually being in love with her.

View it more as an addiction to her presence that has built up over time. After awhile you feel you can't live without it but it doesn't give you the same 'high' as it used to. In fact, it may even be messing with your life in a bad way. You just need to remind yourself that you are fine being alone if need be and take some time for yourself again.

That doesn't mean dump her with no chance of seeing her again. But take a vacation, get a new hobby, fill in your attachment to her with something else for awhile. If you truly do love her - you'll start to have good feelings towards her again after awhile.

And if not, move on. Don't stay if you are unhappy.

The other side of the coin is: we teach people in relationships with us what is acceptable for them to do or not do. If she is doing a lot of things that are unacceptable to you and you will never do anything to show her you don't like it - she'll learn that it is perfectly fine to keep doing those things. So take a firm stand when she does things you don't like. Obviously, don't force her to change but make it known to her you don't like it and be prepared to move on if it becomes overwhelming to you personally. Otherwise prepare for a long relationship you aren't going to be happy in - she IS going to continue doing those things you don't like in the relationship if you don't stand up for yourself. And if she truly loves you she MIGHT try to change to keep you around and both of you happy. Just remember you have to return that favor to her as well and do your own work to keep her happy.

2007-10-21 21:48:52 · answer #1 · answered by Patriotic Libertarian 3 · 1 0

I personally think you love the girl. If your constantly letting her make mistakes which is something you have never done before, then perhaps you do love her. Does your heart race every time you hear her name or her voice? Just thinking about her makes you smile, like little kid in a toy store? If you do love her, let her know, let her know that something she does you don't like, so she can work it out and maybe you guy's can be together. Best of luck hunny!

Btw; if your friends are making little mistakes, you shouldn't just disown them. We are all humans, we all make mistakes, some worse then others. You need to learn to respect them for who they are an not for their mistakes. Life is too short! Go by this quote....

"I almost always forgive people
not because I'm weak but
because I'm strong enough
to understand that ;;
People Make Mistakes...."

I say you give your friend's 3 strikes, an then their out. As I said before, we are all humans, we all make mistakes. Most of us learn from our mistakes and know not to make it happen again. If you catch yourself thinking about her all the time, then you are most certainly in love. I see some ppl saying 'you know when your in love', yes this is true, BUT some ppl don't realize it until it's too late. I hoping that doesn't happen to you. You should take her out to eat, or watch a movie, an talk to her about things. The worst that can happen is you continue to be friends with her, and that's not better, it's better then not having her in your Life at all, right? Seriously, talk things out! I wish the best of luck to you, if you want to talk or anything, just message me! Good luck!

2007-10-21 21:26:52 · answer #2 · answered by It's A Girl ? 3 · 3 0

on account that an exceedingly long term in the past, human beings have sought for the meaning of love. yet even the excellent philosophers, with their profound definitions, could no longer completely touch its actual essence. In a survey of four-8 300 and sixty 5 days olds, young ones share their perspectives on love.

2016-10-04 08:18:40 · answer #3 · answered by lutz 4 · 0 0

Well,it is not that damn easy to tell you what's going on but the fact that for the first time you are so patience shows something to me...
You know better than all of us how do you exactly feel..
However,by yourself,you must search your feelings and find out what's going on...

Probably you are in love with her and that is reason you can't let her go like the others..
If that is uncharacteristic of yours,then possibly something is going on...

No one can tell you for sure except by yourself..
Take care Mont...

2007-10-21 21:28:15 · answer #4 · answered by Koumidiator WRW VLR OS 7 · 1 0

Love, you're definitely in love with her...

MONTITUDE IS IN LOVE
MONTITUDE IS IN LOVE
MONTITUDE IS IN LOVE
MONTITUDE IS IN LOVE.

Did you propose your love to her???
First do it, before she or you leaves each other and go somewhere far away...

After you propose your love to her & also if she accepts it, then you can & try to change her day by day slowly.

Like whenever she does something which you dislike, just react at that time itslef in a calm & quite way without hurting her show yourself that you dont like it with a cute attractive smile.

So dude i wish you all the best & i wish that she changes her self & make you happy.

Any help needed just IM me, i can definitely help you on this topic than cricket.

2007-10-21 21:59:39 · answer #5 · answered by Nafeez Nash 6 · 1 0

I thought you were a champ in wrestling only.

So,you have a soft heart too. lol

Yes. There is every chance that you have fallen in love with that girl.

'To forget & to forgive' is what is called 'love'..

Haven't you seen in movies that once the hero falls in love, his behaviour changes a lot..

You are no exception dear..lol

She is the right person for you..She will be lucky to have you..

Go ahead..

Good luck..

2007-10-21 22:05:02 · answer #6 · answered by PuPPy 6 · 1 0

you have answered the question yourself,she is your best friend,may be thats why you are forgiving again and again,thats how it is best frnds are too good to let go.now,whether you love her or not thats for you to decide,all i can say is dont leave her just becoz you leave everyone else,dont let her go until and unless you really want her to get out of your life

2007-10-22 06:22:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Yes you can be in love with her but you may harm your studies because of this.I am only advcicng you.I think you may harm.This is only an advice from your elder brother.

2007-10-22 01:42:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

Yes! You are in love with her or maybe you have learnt how to forgive ppl.

2007-10-21 21:19:55 · answer #9 · answered by Mastero 4 · 1 0

It appears that you have developed a liking for her and it may gradually change into love.

2007-10-21 23:26:38 · answer #10 · answered by vakayil k 7 · 1 0

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