she turns what I say around****?

Question

I really like this girl alot we are both bi. It started out her just talking to me she had a gf then so later down the line her gf broke it off with her. We even talked afterward. So months later she asked me out I expected I have never had a gf or been with a girl. I tell her everything. But when i do she gets mad when she thinks someone is trying to make a move on me, weather it's a guy or a girl! I tell her that it's not going to happen but she comes up with these reason to say it's not me she doesn't trust it them. Well we end up fighting most of the night away about stuff like that, but she makes me think things about her too cause she thinks that way about me. Then when I make a remark like I'm not going to tell you stuff she gets upset and blames me which makes me feel bad. I don't want to lie to her but I'm not sure how to keep things good without lying. Can I please have some advice thanks!

Answer 1

You have to decide if she is doing this out of control or if she is insecure about herself. It sounds like she is insecure and probably has abandonment problems, I do, and it's very hard to trust somebody- anybody, no matter how much you love them. The best thing you can do it assure her that you would never cheat on her and she doesn't have any reason to be concerned. Don't do this when you are fighting, do this when you are alone, calm, and in a loving setting.

She shouldn't be trying to control you, however. If she tries to get you to stop talking to people or seeing people, then that crosses the line in to controliveness, which is abusive. And trying to get you to feel bad for doing nothing is also abusive.

Good luck, girly. :)

Answer 2

You have to tell her that if she loved you, she would trust that you'd stay faithful, and that if she can't trust you, maybe you shouldn't be dating. I know this seems extreme, but sometimes it takes an even stronger push to get someone to see things clearly. Don't give up on it, even if things get even bumpier.