how many women..are married..in a seeminly happy marriage..(im happy anyway, he says he is..)BUT..the sex is not nearly frequent enough and not that great..its gotten very boring...im always trying to come up with ways to spice things up...but he says when guys get older they loose there 'libito'...hes only 37..and i just turned 30...im attractive,fun and very flirty with my husband..nothing seems to spark anything...so my QUESTION is how do u keep things alive and what do u do when things get kinda ..BLAH?? (without cheating)..ofcouse ;-)
2007-10-21 15:48:44 · 11 answers · asked by lisa baby... 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If he's only 37, that's WAY too young to lose your Libido. Try more like 67 or 87. Take him to a doctor for a full physical now. He could have high blood pressure, or diabetes, or any of a number of things that is blunting his sex drive. Sex drive sometimes is the first thing to go when a real problem is developing. If he's OK, I hate to say this, But are you sure He's not cheating? Perhaps your higher sex drive has depressed him and has gotten him thinking he can't keep up with you, and he's lost the will to try. Perhaps your best move is to lay off a little, and let things settle for a while, and then slowly reintroduce your sex life to him. And be more in tune to him when he's had enough, or you're starting to depress him again.
You may just have to resign yourself to being with a man that just doesn't need a lot of activity in the bedroom, or you might even have to rethink your marriage.
I'm 49, and I haven't lost my libido yet, and my blood pressure is a little high, and I'm borderline diabetic.
My sources for spicing things up are mags like Men's Health, Cosmo, and whatever else I can find. I listen, I read, and I fantasize quite frequently. Our only boundaries in bed are it's got to be for both of us, Nothing degrading, or involving pain.
Good Luck
2007-10-21 16:54:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I must agree with oldbeatnik. Have him get checked out. And, I know what a BOB is, but what the heck does it stand for? Anyway, My other answer is try something else sexual with him. Go down on him. Take it anal. Bring over a friend for you both to enjoy. Get a toy. Role play. Tease him in a sexy teddy. If you don't have the body to pull off a teddy, try a sheet, and pretend it's a toga or whatever they're called. But, definately check him out medically too. You could be worrying about what you can do for no reason, and it's all his internal clockwork working against the situation. I've heard of libido's coming back from numerous people in my Sex Addicts group once they get their health back in check. Good luck.
2007-10-21 16:21:26 · answer #2 · answered by werbodalini 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was married for 14 years and this is all I can say .... we had our ups and downs and I think that is the same with most couples . You cant always be in high gear (lol) . If you want it and he dont ...... go get a (ermm B.O.B) . Maybe that will turn him on and if it dont then take care of your wants/needs that way . Sex isnt the most important thing in a marriage , it is high on the list though . Relationships change in many different ways and maybe this is just a stepping stone in your relationship . Good luck .
PS . rechargeable batteries (lol)
2007-10-21 15:57:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Try a Teddi or some other type of sexy garment that will spark his interest,of course blended with a little whisper in his ear and a dash of perfume and a pinch of caress topped off with a spike of wine, if that don't work "Call me"!!!
2007-10-21 16:06:19 · answer #4 · answered by handynewf 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Role play. My husband and i do that and its great fun. I have a bunch of costumes and even different wigs. Once i tied him to his desk chair with his neckties. Be spontaneous and dont over think it.
2007-10-21 16:03:28 · answer #5 · answered by natasha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Next life don't marry someone 7-years older.
2007-10-21 16:25:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First have him see his doctor. There are many conditions that can cause loss of libido... high blood pressure, diabetes, hormone imbalance, thyroid, to name a few. I know when I got my blood pressure and blood sugar in line, mine came right back.
2007-10-21 16:06:33 · answer #7 · answered by old beatnik 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow
how come i cant find anyone like you?
i get stuck with the friggen sticks in the mud that use sex as a reward system or as a gift when i 'behave'
lol
damn
2007-10-21 15:53:25 · answer #8 · answered by Effu 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am 52, and she never had to do anything other than offer it up. I want it every day. Been with her 31 years.
2007-10-21 16:35:43 · answer #9 · answered by Patrick G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I thought guys never lose their libido! I would try role playing. It should help spice it up!
2007-10-21 15:53:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋