how can i handle that some people might view me as a person to avoid, stay away from, because i go about my?

Question

business on my own...have no friends....have a stern, miserable expression.....even though i use it as my coping mechanism to say ' im ok jack ' ' im soldiering on '.....i may appear to people very aloof and cold.....because i have alot of pride....want to not admit im vunerable and hurting inside......

i call it the wounded lion syndrome......because a wounded lion wont tell you hes hurt..

im 30, have borderline personality disorder, and ptsd and aggrophobia to.. i go out only when i have to and have to force myself i live in a small place in england, and i was thinking people probablly see me coming and going on my own......this guy with an aloof, serios expression on his face..

and i was fearing how people might percieve me....as this sad loner guy, troubled...somebody to avoid.
ive suffered greatly in my life with bullying and abuse....but until i build my life up & accomplish my goals of emigrating from britain to build a new life......this is how people might view me

but i feel lifes made me this way to....

because of my life situation ive never made no friends....never been employed......and ive soldiered on in this way for some time now........
i think its to try and protect myself and vunerabilty..
but even after all this time....im concerned at how people outthere might see me.......and that theyve ostracized me because of it..

Professo... : does it make you feel good about yourself to make smart *** comments?

have you lived in my shoes? endured what ive had to endure, ?

maybe if you had, you would understand my bitterness, struggle and misery.
you no....' walk a mile in their shoes? '

so gooday to you

Answer 1

Man you make your life what you want to be and who you want to be around.

Be more friendly and you will have more friends. YOU know that by now. And WHAT's the question?

Professor

Answer 2

Your absolutely right about how people see you. Why would want to continue living a life that is void of human contact, emotion, comfort, etc? Do you want to continue this all your life? You are 30 years old...do you think that you really should be making a effort to better your quality of life? You don't know what you're missing. You say that you've suffered a lot in your life and that really is very unfortunate, but you are continuing to punish yourself more by continuing to do the same thing and achieving the same results. Can you try to make one small change that can possibly allow you to meet some people, get to a comfortable position with that, make another small step to further and encourage some friendship with someone? At certain comfort levels keep making these small steps. Look how far you've come. You do have it in you to give yourself what you want. I believe you know that if you do not try something different your life will remain the same. You need to fight for yourself to achieve something better. If you don't do it for yourself; then who will. As hard as it may be for you, can you forgive and start forgetting some of the nasty stuff that you have gone through...it will become easier the more you start to give people a chance to know you. Allow yourself that, fight for yourself, and give yourself a break. You are giving all the horrible stuff that happened to you in the past more attention than it deserves. Don't let that stuff be you main focus in life. You can do better. Good luck. I know you can do it.

Answer 3

Let me know if you get any good answers here... You pretty much described me, as well. For now, I just keep telling myself that relationships are too much bother, because I don't have the desire to help anyone else with their own issues. And remember, we ALL have our issues, even if it isn't obvious.

Answer 4

It sounds like you are conflicted. You say you want to be "alone" you worry about how people perceive you, yet you make yourself unapproachable. Tried therapy?