Before I even explain anything, please do not accuse me of being jealous. I have no reason whatsoever to be jealous of my mother inlaw. We actually get along really well, but there are some things that bug me.
1) Whenever we go to their house to visit (which is an hour away) my husband has to call her the minute we get into our house to let her know we made it. Every single time. If he doesn't she calls him and gets upset because he didn't call. But he makes it a point to keep her in the loop.
2) Whenever we go somewhere, say out to eat or we go to a movie and it's late, he will call her as soon as we get out the movie or as soon as we get home to tell her we made it and that we're in the for the night. He'll actually say "Well we made it home and we're in the for the night and we're in the bed.".
2007-10-21 05:56:46 · 9 answers · asked by Hoping he will bless me with #1 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
3) It's almost like he has withdrawals if he doesn't see his mother and she has withdrawals if she doesn't see him. A couple of months ago they were coming to our house every weekend for 5-6 weeks straight. Either that or we were going to spend the weekend with them. My husband seems to be happiest when he can be around his parents. He could care less about being around my family. As long as him and his parents are together he is fine. We will sit at their house for the entire weekend and all we'll do is go out to eat and play cards.
4) I know for a fact that he has shared my salary information with her. He also tells her about our finances and that we can't afford to do this and that, because now she almost always pays for our meals when we go out. That bothers me a lot because we make decent salaries. We just bought a new house 6 months ago so we're getting adjusted to that but we're okay.
2007-10-21 06:00:53 · update #1
5) He calls her each day while on his way to work, when he gets home and before he goes to bed. This is every single day. If she doesn't hear from him, she calls the house and acts like she's dying and says "Why didn't you call me? I didn't know if something happened to you or not.". Then he'll have to give her an excuse.
6) She'll make a reason for him to have to come visit her. For instance, my husband works for a company that makes soda. He gets a discount once a month and she will order 3 or 4 cases of soda and juice and that's a sure way she'll get to see him that weekend.
7) When we go to visit them she will do whatever she can to keep us there for as long as she can. We'll spend Saturday (all day Saturday) and most of Sunday and when it's time to go home she wants to cook dinner or go out to dinner.
She is 62 and his dad is 67 and he's an only child ... which probably explains most of this.
2007-10-21 06:04:31 · update #2
He knows how I feel to a degree but he gets annoyed because I would even feel that way. When I say this I mean it ... he's the type of man who cannot take constructive criticism and he cannot deal with any issues and he especially doesn't want you talking about his mother or niece regardless of what it is. He's not the type of guy you can talk to about everything because he takes offense to everything.
2007-10-21 06:05:46 · update #3
The sad thing is - he doesn't even communicate with his own wife like this.
2007-10-21 06:10:50 · update #4
omg you have married yourself a mamas boy and you will never be considered important to him because you are not his mom . I would say to him that he has to make a choice ,wife or mother he cannot have both because you cannot live like that . They are a little too close if you ask me and you are always going to get left out . good luck .
2007-10-21 06:48:07 · answer #1 · answered by Kate T. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is normal in many families and I wouldn't worry about it too much unless it gets to the point that it interferes with your life in some way. Look at the good side - He will probably never cheat on you because of having two woman watching him rather than just you. It may even be that she has seen a case or had it happen in the family where someone went somewhere and didn't make it home so she is worried that it might happen to you and your husband so she may be just as happy if you call rather than him just to know that you are safely home.
2007-10-21 06:09:23 · answer #2 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me as if he hasn't cut the apron strings yet. Why does she need to know that you've gotten home from a movie or dinner out? Frankly I'd be wondering what else about our private life he was telling his mother!
2007-10-21 06:16:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the guy you're married to is the two egocentric and overbearing and a administration freak who has no appreciate for you in any respect..........get some money mutually and get decrease back to the united states of a, the place you are able to divorce this 'man or woman' ........does your son have a US passport or became he born in India and is an Indian citizen? ought to he end you leaving including your son? purely a concept! i might %. your bags, watch for him to flow on one in each and every of his lacking journeys, then %. up all his issues out of your dad and mom residing house and drop them off at his dad and mom in the previous you flow away...basically get any info and copies of his company/financial money owed so which you will get toddler help from him. good success............flow and don't look decrease back
2016-10-13 10:24:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The calling her when you guys get home from visiting her is one thing. But the calling her after you two go out is just weird.
2007-10-21 06:08:34 · answer #5 · answered by Spring 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In India its like that but calling so much is not good. Just try to put yourself more to him to reach you instead of her all the time. And secondly I think they are old and just cool. If they are loving to you then enjoy their care and free dinners and pampering. Just make sure your husband forgets about his family when he is with you.
2007-10-21 06:14:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe he is just being considerate of her feelings, although they may be over the top, she may still worry about him. Something may have happened in the past to cause her to worry and he is just thinking of her. Does he know how this makes you feel...if not, you may need to tell him....or if you two do get along, ask her...tell her how this makes you feel. Communication is the best tool in any relationship.
2007-10-21 06:02:55 · answer #7 · answered by mbsb813 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
wow. that's pretty bad.
i would definetly say that is not a healthy relationship. she really needs to back off, and he needs to stop encouraging her. that would drive me completely insane!
maybe he should go talk to a therapist about his relationship with his mother. yeah, that is very strange.
2007-10-21 12:29:54 · answer #8 · answered by tinkbostwick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you get along what does it hurt
2007-10-21 06:03:16 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋