I love my boyfriend and we have been together for nearly 4 years and have 2 kids together and my family like him but they dont want me to marry him. As I said I do love him but im not sure myself if I want to marry him. He's caring and treats me lovely and is great dad but he can be sarcastic and ignorant and sometimes I feel I wont be able to put up with it for the rest of my life. All he goes on about is gettin married and I keep making up excuses like we cant afford it etc and I have told him the truth and he just says we meant to be together. I'm 19 and he's 24 and I keep telling him we have got alot of time before we have to think about getting married.
What should I do?
2007-10-21 03:32:31 · 9 answers · asked by Natz 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Do what you know is right. Don't marry him. Tell him what you need from him. Be dead honest. See if it could be different.
For heaven's sake don't have any more kids together or with anyone else. Get educated, get your life in order and stand your ground.
Don't make excuses. Spell out the issues and suggest solutions. See if you guys have any ability to solve problems effectively and can work as a team. Love doesn't get you far in marriage if one of you is an idiot.
2007-10-21 03:45:19 · answer #1 · answered by whereRyou? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The question is not whether you want to marry him, but rather whether you want to be with him. It sound like there are many things you don't like about him as a person. Just because you have kids and have been together for a long time doesn't mean you have to settle for the person you're not in love with or have a connection with.
Marriage is just a sign that you two are on the same page. If you don't want to be on the same page with him, then don't. But do be honest with yourself and him about how you feel about each other regardless of the piece of paper. That's what's important. Follow your bliss. You know if you are by asking yourself how you're feeling. If you mostly feel good, then you're on the right track. If not, ask yourself why and go from there.
2007-10-21 10:48:27 · answer #2 · answered by whatif 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your already married. You do have alot of time to get married but on the other hand you have been together for 4 years and you have children already but yet your still not sure that could be a sign your not ready
2007-10-21 10:41:14 · answer #3 · answered by Girly1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
4 years - 2 kids - and you are 19. What would you gain by getting married at this point? Unless you LIVE with your parents, I don't see what would change if you got married. I know I'm old fashioned, but what factor determines to you when it is TIME to get married??
2007-10-21 12:00:27 · answer #4 · answered by sixftrd 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him that you had plans of things you wanted to do before you got married. Its not your parents' choice its urs. but if ur not sure, make sure you wait until you're sure. Marriage is not to be taken lightly.
2007-10-21 10:48:39 · answer #5 · answered by lilmomma86 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you know for sure if you are ready to marry him...and from what you are saying.......You are definitely not ready....so I would suggest that you wait until you are 100% sure you want to marry him...
2007-10-21 10:41:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are already common law married and unless you want to make it legal by faith, whats the point? if you leave him your still going to have to go through divorce and custody, child support and alimony hearings. do as you will , you already did. why change now?
2007-10-21 10:43:11 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You intuition say stay away. Stay away.
2007-10-21 11:15:28 · answer #8 · answered by csiders30 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your not sure wait.
2007-10-21 10:45:31 · answer #9 · answered by ronnny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋