Please help me. How do i get her to stop?

Question

So when i get mad i like to be alone and just think to myself. Thats normally when i get into a fight with my mom. So i try and leave not saying anything but she follows me and yells. When i dont answer her i get in more trouble. Or even that im walking away i get in trouble. How do i get her to just leae me alone? I tried telling her this but she doesnt listen.

Answer 1

ognore and walk away thats all yoi can do xxx

Answer 2

Sounds like some anger problems here. Now, we all have anger and it had been suggested for years not to hold it in or cover it up. A short while back, I read that this isn't necessarily the best thing to do.

Your words, "So when I get mad...." seems to be the start of your trouble. Your Mom sees this and knows it will be easy to rile you (yes even Moms will do this).

So my advice would be to cover your anger, put on an act (life's just a big act mostly anyway). Chat nicely with Mom for a couple minutes, then snap your fingers and say, I just remembered Mom I gotta go clean my room". (or do home work, or write a letter whatever). Walla!, home free.

Also you might want to post your question in psychology, or other category. The polls and survey category is a light-hearted one, short silly questions and answers, more for fun and laughs really.


EDIT, Wow you got some great answers and advice here. My apologies to the P&S community. Actually better than what I've seen in the pshychology section.

Answer 3

It depends on what she is telling you. Is she saying "so your homework so you wont' flunk out of school, don't do drugs or drink or hang around people who do, clean your room because I'm not your slave, or I'm your Mom and I have a right to know where you are at all times"? These are all very reasonable things your Mom may be concerned about.
On the other hand, if she's just arguing for the sake of arguing maybe she's just stressed out. does she have other worries besides you in her life. If so pitch in and be sure to help her out as much as you can and then sh'ell be in a better mood. Good luck

Answer 4

Try not to get into situations where confrontation will occur. I know it is not easy as we are all affected by our moods of the moment. There must be something triggering these arguments and you will know what they are and basically whilst you still live with your mother you will be bound by the rules of the house. However, you could try again just saying to your Mum that when your mad you are best left to come round on your own - keep it unemotional short and to the point see how she reacts to it but chose a good moment.

Answer 5

Try sitting her down and telling her that when you get mad that you need space to calm down and that by doing that she will prevent some of the fighting. Tell her, that if you need her then you will be back when you have cooled down and will talk to her calmly. If she still does not listen tell your dad or someone who can help with the situation that she needs to give you some space and that it is not her fault at all, people sometimes just need space and time to calm down when angry or upset. I hope this helps you some.

Answer 6

Just ask her what she used to do when she was your age and argued with her mother. I bet she did the same as you.

Then if she says she never had that problem, tell her she does now!!!!

Just tell her, you need time out. Walking away from an argument is taught in anger management. This prevents the argument from escalating.

Answer 7

Until you are eighteen and living elsewhere, your mother will always get angry if you try to just be alone. I suggest that when she is angry with you and asks you questions, you should respond as much like an adult as you can. I'm sorry that she doesn't understand that you prefer to be alone when you're angry, but I hope that I helped a little bit.

Answer 8

well you must know by now what her and your patterns are in arguments...so plan for the next one...and let yourself remain calm in the midst of the chaos...if not you storm out of the room and mom feels disrespected...maybe when both of you are calm and there are a few laughs between you or maybe just a relaxed moment try the following...
Mom I want to try something
I want to try a mock argument with you being me and me being you
I want to see me as you see me and I want you to see you as I see you...then ask someone in to be an audience and who can stop things if they start to heat up...mostly though you should get some laughs out of this...use moms voice and gestures and let her do the same with you...at the moment when she walks away...do what she does when it is you storming away...you might both learn something new about each other...then again it might teach you something about yourself...

Answer 9

ok. when you are frustrated, angry, irritated, or any of that great stuff do a breathing exercise (no I am not a therapist). Breath in, almost trying to make your stomach reach your spine and hold in for 4 seconds, then breath out slowly. it works wonders to relax you. and if that doesnt work, try talking to your mom when you are both on good terms with each other and make a "plan", per say for how you will deal with each other when you are not on good terms.

Answer 10

just talk with her when u r both in a good mood about that. let her know that whenu arguin u prefer to stay alone because u may say things u dont mean cause u r angry.tell her also that u prefer to talk with her about the problem when u will both calm down and u can work it out calmly

Answer 11

tell her!
Im exactly like this with my mum and then she follows and I end up screaming at her full volume, and sometimes even wanting to hit her =[
I spoke to her last week about it and said that if I walk off, to leave me until I have calmed down and I come back downstairs then she can continue shouting
Plus it calms my mum down leaving me a while and she isnt so hard on me
Result! =]