IT is iimportant that you understand the language used online today...here are some clues as to what you are reading in the ads:
DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS
40-ish - 49
Adventurous - Slept with everyone
Athletic - No ****
Average looking - Ugly
Beautiful - Pathological liar
Contagious Smile - Does a lot of pills
Emotionally secure - On medication
Feminist - Fat
Free spirit - Junkie
Friendship first - Former very *friendly* person
Fun - Annoying
New Age - Body hair in the wrong places
Open-minded - Desperate
Outgoing - Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate - Sloppy drunk
Professional - *****
Voluptuous - Very Fat
Large frame - Hugely Fat
Wants Soul mate - Stalker
WOMEN'S ENGLISH
1. Yes = No
2. No = Yes
3. Maybe = No
4. We need = I want
5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry
6. We need to talk = you're in trouble
7. Sure, go ahead = you better not
8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later
9. I am not upset = of course I am upset, you moron!
10. You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?
MEN'S ENGLISH
1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
5. I love you = let's have sex now
6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you
8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you
9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you
11. Those shoes don't go with that outfit = I'm gay
And finally.....
A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle.
For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with rugged, masculine features.
However when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump shoved up his backside
2007-10-21 00:11:51 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Senior Citizens
That's ok...the last time I was ovulating, I was attracted to a neandratal...not one of my brigher choices in life, but i reality, my live is filled with not so bright decisions...it took a week to get rid of the hair left behind...never again.
2007-10-21 01:15:02 · update #1
GW! As Jggly Jugs says, you are a font of knowledge. WHAT would we do without you? I was just going to get my 360 up and running, actually it's up, but as usual, I can never think of what to say about me.
Now I know WHAT NOT TO SAY! Like the song says:- "Just in time, you came just in time", to save my.....
2007-10-21 00:41:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋
Nice advice (thanks) and that i agree. Many folks are too quick to jump into marriage and then surprise why it falls aside after a couple years or even less. I can feel of at the least 10 couples i know personally who are actually divorced. Vows aren't taken severely any more. There is not plenty of consideration and inspiration being put into marriage and what it particularly takes. Simply on account that two men and women are in love doesn't suggest that they will have to get married. I'm 26 and marriage remains to be a protracted ways off for me. I'd instead wait and make sure it can be proper and going to final than become an extra divorce that everyone talks about.
2016-08-05 21:50:15 · answer #2 · answered by barksdale 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
surprising advice (thank you) and that i agree. many people are too speedy to leap into marriage and then ask your self why it falls aside after a pair years or perhaps much less. i'm able to think of of a minimum of 10 couples i be attentive to in my view who're now divorced. Vows are actually not taken heavily from now on. there's no longer a large number of attention and concept being positioned into marriage and what it relatively takes. purely by way of fact 2 people are in love does no longer propose that they could desire to get married. i'm 26 and marriage remains an prolonged procedures off for me. i could relatively wait and make constructive it relatively is precise and going to final than grow to be yet another divorce that each and every person talks approximately.
2016-10-07 08:01:51 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A lot of those personal ads need taking with a large pinch of salt.ie Gorgeous attractive adventurous female? so why are you advertising surely the blokes are queueing up?
2007-10-21 04:16:24 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
You know, laughter is the best medicine.
Sure is a whole lot better than Morphine!
Thanks for sharing the love.
2007-10-21 09:26:22 · answer #5 · answered by Cranky 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ROFLMAO!!! I am single but thanks to personal ads like the ones you mention, I am no longer looking! At least not that hard! But come on be fair, are men really any more honest in thoses things than women?
2007-10-22 10:27:41 · answer #6 · answered by michelledenay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For future references, I can say that I'm a fun open-minded passionate, who wants a soul mate. You are a great help, Goldwing. THANK YOU!
2007-10-21 01:23:34 · answer #7 · answered by Wickwire 5 · 7⤊ 0⤋
I will add the one I found out about in online dating
Naturist=buck nekkid (this is opposed to naked) Southern Nekkid means the "nasty"
LOL
2007-10-21 02:19:48 · answer #8 · answered by slk29406 6 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Goldwing! it sounds like you are on medication. I Love your dry sense of humour when you are being serious but today you are absolutely, positively ,hilarious . ROFL!!!
2007-10-21 08:31:28 · answer #9 · answered by Donna 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I hope Wally sees this as it might help him decipher modern online dating habits and language.
2007-10-21 07:34:29 · answer #10 · answered by Southern Comfort 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋