Name Changing???

Question

I have been reading "The Sociologically Examined Life" by Michael Schwalbe.

Here is a quote from it followed by a question Schwalbe later asks. please answer and explain.... Thanks

"In the past, women gave up their family names upon getting married and took the last name of their new husband. This practice served to indicate that a woman as a piece of property, had been transferred from one male(the father) to another(the husband). Men did not change their names. Men were owners, not property.
Today we reject the idea of women as property, yet this name changing practice persists why"

why?*

...Who benefits from these traditions????

is it truly neccesary to replace(or add) from yours?

Answer 1

Well, this is one of the wedding traditions that I don't actually see as signifying a transfer of property. Giving away the bride and asking the father for permission to marry does signify property, regardless of what some others may say when they say "It's tradition tehe!" because obviously those traditions come from somewhere.

I think that the name changing is more to do with the patriarchal system of family we have in our society. Basically, the father's lineage is followed, not the mother's and when a woman marries she becomes part of her husband's father's lineage. Her children carry their name and in the past, certain inheritance rights.

Why is it still done? Well, I believe it's becoming less common although it's still the norm. I think mostly because everyone else is doing it. We learn our culture and our society through the actions of others and traditions, although many of us especially those who are tradtionalists have no idea where these traditions come from. Many people are not 'boat rockers' so to speak and will not go against certain traditions or even bother to think about them. They are blind carriers of culture. Having the same name signifies being part of your husband's family and your children are part of his family.

I do think it would be great if men were to start taking their wive's names or if couples kept the same name and children could have some combination of the two or either parents name or if couples when they get married were to create their own new last name from a combination of both their family names to signify family unity.

Answer 2

I've never seen it as a "property transfer" thing. I always saw it as a woman being proud of being associated with the name of the man she loves. I think of it as a sign of committment that a woman shows to the man she wants to be with. I think it shows a sense of strong family that all the people in that family, husband, wife and children, have the same name. I don't like the new tradition of partners keeping their names and saddling the kids with long hyphenated surnames. It seems like a divisive thing, like each is separate, not part of a solid unit.
I was never more proud than the day I changed my name to that of my husband. I think it showed that I intended to be with him forever. Even when the marriage went bust, I've kept my married name because it's the name my kids have and I want us to be a family.
Maybe the tradition persists because there are others like me who see it as an honour to be given the name of someone you love, not something that shows you've been traded like a cow.

Answer 3

My mother got remarried after she and my father divorced (25 years married to my father). It's been 20 years, but she kept her first married name, (my maiden name) because she had developed a national professional reputation, and felt that keeping the name she had borne the most years and the name most of her colleagues knew her was best. My step-father was unaware that she didn't legally go by his surname until recently. He was unconcerned because she actually goes by both surnames now. Not hyphenated, just two last names.

Answer 4

Tradition, and the fact that it makes it easier to have one family name.

Answer 5

that is a hard question. i took my husbands name because it is tradition, not because he owns me. and a man should carry on the family name, not the woman.

Answer 6

When I got married I kept my last name and just added his

Answer 7

Yeah, why? I probaby won't be changing my last name when I get married.