My husband is in the Millitary in another state working, he threatens me over the phone, in a sexual way, for when he returns, not caring about what I don't want, or any pain, he said he is a sexual deviant, I am home taking care of the children, but these threats scare me, what should I do, legally? for myself and my children.
2007-10-20
09:45:42
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17 answers
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asked by
l
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Family & Relationships
➔ Marriage & Divorce
Can I get a protective or restraining oder even if he is in another state?
2007-10-22
05:00:20 ·
update #1
go to his superior person in the military. He can get in some serious trouble... they will take the action neccessary. It's hard to do things legally with the military but i do know personally that things will happen if you go talk to his commander in charge of him.
2007-10-20 09:50:03
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answer #1
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answered by heartbreaker6713 3
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nicely, this guy has you by potential of the balls so which you may communicate, as he's doing this on the telephone, and not in emails, or letters, which might provide you the info. So, as others have stated you should checklist greater effective than between the conversations, it is #a million. you like the info. in case you will get him to place it into written form this may well be the info. you are able to notify HIS protection tension upline (for a loss of greater useful phraseology) and make a criticism of abuse. the protection tension take this heavily. you will could desire to additionally, flow the course with the community police. And document rates if achieveable, with a restraining order. basically getting the restraining order will probable particularly set him off, so which you like a backup plan. which includes, kinfolk risk-free practices, shifting to a distinctive city, abuse shelters etc. Take an afternoon or 2 to shelter despite funds you are able to from financial institution money owed, decrease value rates etc as you'll want it. And proceed with the plan to flow away him. shop issues as secret as you are able to, and purely have confidence those that wont permit him be attentive to the place you and the babies are.
2016-10-13 08:38:06
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answer #2
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answered by ? 3
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When did he turn deviant? You had kids by him and now all of a sudden he's scaring you. If he has picked up bad sexual habits from else where, then the next time he began to tell you what he want to do to you ask him to let you record this so you can have his sex talk with you while you are alone. Take it to the chain of command and tell them you want protection from him, child support, alimony and an apology from the little sex demon. Don't be scared. You need your strength for your kids. God bless.
2007-10-20 09:56:05
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answer #3
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answered by Go GO Ressa 5
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Check with the law in your state regarding taping your own phone calls. In some states it is permissable for one person to tape a phone call without warning the other person he/she is being taped.
Tape several conversations between you and your husband. End every call after asking him to stop being abusive and threatening and warning him that his conduct is abusive and you will press charges agaisnt him.
Take your evidence to get a Temporary Restraining Order from your local Disctrict Attorney.
Take you evidence and the TRO to the Base Commander who oversees your husband. The military code of justice is much harsher about how its soldiers act, and can be used against a disrespectful soldier much more quickly than either a civilian police order or a civil court.
IF YOU ARE EVER IN IMMEDIATE HARM FROM YOUR HUBAND, YOU ARE ALLOWED TO DEFEND YOURSELF IN A MANNER WHICH WILL STOP THE POTENTIAL HARM! If you fear for your life or the life of another, you may take action to stop the possibility of that life-threatening action.
DO NOT NOW OR EVER PLAN TO KILL SOMEONE. PLAN ONLY TO STOP THEIR ASSAULT.
2007-10-20 09:55:16
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answer #4
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answered by Anonymous
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first, get an answering machine and record these conversations so that he can not deny them. Find an attorney and file for divorce and a personal protection order - the tapes will show that you have a reason for that, and also child support.. You can report that to a superior officer of his but they may kick him out of the service and you may not know where he is and you do know now. Also, it may be harder for him to get away from there to get to you if he can be charged with desertion if he leaves there.
contact a local domestic violence shelter in your area and they can help you deal with this emotionally and possibly with other needs as well. Do all of this as soon as you can before he gets a chance to return for your sake and the sake of your children
2007-10-20 10:02:44
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answer #5
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answered by Al B 7
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You have legal recourse with the military. Contact his command immediately and let them know NOW (call the Officer of the Day if need be). Do NOT let him know you are calling them! Call the Legal office at his base. Call a local attorney in your area also, that even though you are married, this is considered harrassment. If there's a way to 'tape' these conservations, do so, and let him know you are taping him! Military wives have been hurt and murdered in the past.
2007-10-20 09:52:28
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answer #6
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answered by Empress Jan 5
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if you do not want him to come home, you need to file for divorce while he is gone, that will make it much easier you don't have to deal with him when he comes home, the process will have already have started. also you can record the phone calls. and you can contact his first shirt. the military doesn't like anything embearassing to happen to their boys. if you inform his first shirt of he situation, he will make him cool down. but i would get in to the lawyers office immediatly. if he is just telling you he wants to get sexual when he gets home from TDY, and that scares you, yall proabably should be together anyway. take care. good luck
2007-10-20 09:58:00
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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If you want to do something legal then get a restraining order...Is he serious when he says these things or blowing off steam...make sure you tell him you are afraid and you don't want the same things...be very careful and tell someone close to you about this..don't worry on your own all alone...I wonder if he was like this before he left and how you handled it....please talk to someone close get their opinion..someone that knows you both to see if you are in danger...once again please be careful
2007-10-20 09:51:14
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answer #8
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answered by cinderellas_match 2
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Record the calls, as many as you can. Then take them to a lawyer for YOURSELF. If you give them to his commander, more than likely the whole thing will be dismissed or covered up, because the military doesn't care about you, it cares about itself and its own survival, first.
So go and hire a lawyer, bring him the tapes to listen to, and let him decide what to do from there.
2007-10-20 09:55:42
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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a couple questions.... what rank is he and what branch of service. i am in the service myself and know if he has any kind of rank such as an nco or officer it will be hard for you to get someone to listen. His commander is the way to start, voice your concerns and what he has said to you. You can also go to the base chaplain, as well to get advice and any further people you might need to talk to you. I was in the Air Force so I know the agencies better for them. I am still learning the Army agencies to talk to. But definatly talk to his commander.
2007-10-20 09:53:11
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answer #10
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answered by laziewon2 2
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