Don't know if it is a problem,but if i bring up a subject about gay stuff then my mum has 'that tone',very dismissive and such.
i don't know...it feels like 'yes i accept you're gay but i don't want to talk about it'.
2007-10-20 08:29:46 · 12 answers · asked by Wolborg 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
is it possible to just accept it but not talk about it?i am confused and i don't know...right now i am thinking that if she accepts me then she should know i would want to talk about it from time to time,maybe i am selfish.
2007-10-20 08:37:24 · update #1
i just feel lonely and rejected sometimes,and then i start to wonder if my family is just 'humoring' me and they think it is a phase i am going through.but i'm really not.
2007-10-20 08:50:15 · update #2
That's probably exactly it. She probably hasn't completely adjusted to the idea one of her children is gay. Give her time.
2007-10-20 09:19:35 · answer #1 · answered by Clint 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, we MUST be twins because my Mom's the same way. Well, she WOULD be the same way if we ever TALKED about it. But no, she's so threatened by the thought that we don't discuss the big frickin' pink elephant standing in the middle of the living room that just took a massive dump on the sofa. Nope. Recognizing the big, pink elephant would mean that we're admitting to the fact that it exists and we can't have THAT, Lord knows...
I sympathize with you. Yes, she KNOWS you're gay but doesn't like it and doesn't approve of it. Remember that the society in which your Mum grew up perhaps was not as accepting of homosexuality as it is now. On top of that, she may believe, contrary to popular belief, that you actually CHOSE your orientation; many people still hold that being gay is a conscious choice, not a pre-wired aspect of your being.
Considering my own Mom's behavior, I believe she thinks my gayness was a choice and she's of the mind that I will ultimately pay the price for choosing as such. So I've come to the conclusion that within my lifetime, my mother will never be comfortable talking about it and will harbor a grudge for the rest of her life that I didn't become the wealthy, terribly attractive brain surgeon married to Christy Brinkley with whom we've had 3 adorable and perfectly mannered children. But at the same time, I'm sort of harboring the grudge that she isn't the supportive and open-minded mother that I think she should be. SO NYAH!
2007-10-20 09:15:43 · answer #2 · answered by HMFan 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Parents do not like to talk about their kids' personal life. Accept the fact that you are on your own. You are a grown up now that you are sexually active or at least have declared your intentions.
2007-10-20 08:35:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You basically said it. That's what she means. She accepts it but doesn't want to talk about it. Is it a problem? Only if it's a problem for YOU.
2007-10-20 08:32:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It could be exactly what she's thinking... but keep up talking about whatever you want to talk to her about... maybe even ask her exactly what you asked us... she'll come around eventually... it might take a little time...:P
good luck!
2007-10-20 08:33:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like she accepts it, but is a little uncomfortable about it.
2007-10-20 08:31:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think u got it right on... My mom is the same way...they know but we don't go out of our way to talk about it...
2007-10-20 08:44:34 · answer #7 · answered by ♫christy♫ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe she just does not understand the subject matter so she tryes to help ypu the best she can but really can not tell you much.
2007-10-20 08:33:12 · answer #8 · answered by shalirha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't disagree with your assessment, just let it rest and she may bring it up when she's ready.
2007-10-20 08:34:16 · answer #9 · answered by Pirate AM™ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you have a great mom. it seems that she doesnt really agree with your lifestyle but she knows that it is your choice. you should respect her opinion as much as she respects your choice
2007-10-20 08:40:44 · answer #10 · answered by joshtheG 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋