I really dislike my parents. What do I do to not turn out like them?

Question

my dad does all he can to put me down and my mother hates her life and makes it known in the way she constantly whines.

I don't want to be like this when I grow up, and don't want to have kids or maybe even get married. I don't want to transfer my bitterness and frustrations onto my kids.

What do I do? if you've been in this situation and come out happy and fulfilled, please let me know how!

Answer 1

i moved out . i had the same situation , when i was 13 i spoke to my grandma about moving out. Then i lived with my best friend . you could also go into foster care. The only thing keeping me at my house was my dog , and i had to make a decision to live with my nuts house and my dog or live happily and get a new one . they said i couldn't take her because she is my "parents" property and they payed for her.

Answer 2

watch them an ddecide to not do th esame things. I am very much unlike my parents..okay the vast majority of the time..occasionally "they" will slip in. As you get older watch what other people do and learn. Since you know what your parents do is wrong, then you will need to stop yourself from doing that.
You will transfer some of the frustrations on to your kids. The goal is to minimize it. Every good parent does that.
Good luck oh yeah when you do make mistakes with your kids and you will....learn from it forgive yourself and move on....

Answer 3

You already are like them.

You're putting your father down and whining about your mother.

In my own experience, I discovered that I was more like my relatives than I wanted to admit. I wanted to make sure I didn't repeat their mistakes. In particular, I hated my older brother's temper and his inability to get himself up in the morning. I saw those same tendencies in myself and vowed not to be that way. Because I obsessed over it-- I am now unable to stand up for myself when people take advantage of me, and I wake up at 5:30 every morning, even when I have no reason to.

ANYONE could be described the way you describe your parents. Try to look for their good qualities and remember that they're doing their best. When you have kids you might be more forgiving of your own parents.

Answer 4

You can't let your parents' ways dictate how you expect to be when you grow up. You have to set your own standards and arise to your own expectations. If you think they are doing things wrong, learn from their mistakes, don't duplicate them or think you'll be heading down the same path.

Answer 5

My parents were a lot like that. You have to choose to be different. For me I had to wait until I was old enough to be out of the house to work on being a better person.
It can and will happen for you if you work on it enough.
Good Luck!

Answer 6

what bitterness ,urs or ur dads or ur moms? go to chirch and learn what it takes to not hold judgement on someone like ur parents dont stop going until u can look at ur parents in a different light. u need to look at ur self and improve every thing that u can in ur life u are not ur parents but u will learn from them . its up to u to change the things u dont like about ur parents in ur life. remember that they were once kids also and were taught just like u to be they way they are . thee help u seek must come from within u because it has to be unconditional love that is givien and taught by both parents , but like i said they had to learn it also so good luck and go to church

Answer 7

nothing is stopping you from being different than your dad or mom. you have a choice to be different from them. you won't put people down and make them feel zero. you won't complain when things are bad, you'll doing something to resolve it. you already know that you don't want to be like them, then don't be!