How could the woman you have been married to for over a decade, started a family with and truly adore; say the most hurtful words to you? Based on the way she "feels". I have never laid a hand on her, or cursed her. I have addressed previous concerns that she has presented to me (Friends, spending time, etc.). All to no avail. The only thing that I can come up with is that she wants to split up, however she denies that, but I'm told that I must want to. Then, after a couple of days, no sort of apology, except for, "I wasn't trying to hurt you". No retraction on the vile words that she said. As a matter of fact, tells me that she meant them. I am truly stunned and confused about how to proceed forward with this marriage. She says she does not want to split up. Give me a break, if I were to say the things that she said to me to her; there would be a major shakeup in my home. Please give me the skinny. How do I proceed forward with this 'Sybil' situation?
2007-10-20 02:56:49 · 12 answers · asked by 2blessed2bdissed 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I know what you are going through, except I am the one guilty of treating my husband that way. I say very mean and hurtful things to him when we are fighting or when I am very upset with him. The only answer that I can give you is sometimes women when they feel like they are not being listened to or heard, will resort to the name calling and insults because they think that is the only way to get their point across. Now I am not saying that you don't listen, but when we feel that we are not getting our point across (because we are not getting the answers we want) we feel like you are not listening. So my advice is to listen intently and try to understand that it may just be the only way we have of letting out our frustrations, we say we mean the things we say, but inside we don't want you to leave we just want to feel that you care enough to listen. Good luck! I wish you the best!
2007-10-20 03:50:37 · answer #1 · answered by Kikikins 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to get marriage counseling and learn to communicate because there may be issues she has you are not aware be because she doesn't tell you, to mention just one of many issues that may be involved, and perhaps get her a physical examination - perhaps you should both get one - for any physical condition she may have that cause her to feel this way - anemia, sugar imbalance causing hypoglycemia perhaps or a dozen other things as well. Between the counseling and the physical exam, it may make you both much happier, hopefully. Good Luck!
2007-10-20 03:17:39 · answer #2 · answered by Al B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She said relationship shattering words to you but she doesn't want to break up? She says she wasn't trying to hurt you; but she says terrible things about you to you.
She sounds a bit unbalanced.
I agree w/ the other posters. If you are interested in getting to the bottom of this problem, you're going to need an outside arbitrator to help. Go for a counsellor.
2007-10-20 03:10:12 · answer #3 · answered by krinkn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well the big question is what were the hurtful things said to you? I am sorry for your situation and pray for the best.
2007-10-20 03:02:30 · answer #4 · answered by prodigychild_21 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage counseling. She needs to learn to communicate differently.
2007-10-20 03:00:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
try to find out why she is so hurt if you have done nothing then she could be having mood swings wich is normal in a marriage try to be there for her although you may not want to be try your hardest to love her in these hardt imes
2007-10-20 03:03:28 · answer #6 · answered by oh_jo123 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Marriage counselor.
2.She needs to see a shrink.
Take your pick this is not normal behavior.....She definitely sounds like she has some serious issues and it may or may not be about you are the relationship....Good luck.....
2007-10-20 03:08:49 · answer #7 · answered by Precious 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
when she cools down a little,try talking to her,try listening to her point of view,try spending as much time with her as you can,the best thing you can do,tell her you love her with all the love u can shower upon her,try finding out what has gone wrong,or what is the thing that is troubling her,instead of going to a counselor sit and talk it out with a cuppa coffee
all the best
2007-10-20 03:14:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I do not know her age, but some women begans to be furious at certain point of her life. Not against you, but against everbody, against the world.
2007-10-20 03:18:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find a marriage counselor...fast!
2007-10-20 03:01:43 · answer #10 · answered by Lou L 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋