Do people believe in lifetime marriages these days? Marriage is the minority these days at 49% Im doing it?

Question

And if you think about it howmay of those 49% of married couples cheat on eachother or have open affairs? I'm engaged to get married to a wonderful man. He treats me perfect and is so much in love with me. He always takes my insucurities and feelings in consideration before doing things. And he is at home every night and works hard to provide for me and my child. But he has a past of being a womanizer and sleeping around before we were together. I know he has done me right cause he is at home every night and never does things I don't feel comfortable with him doing. I'm just worried cause people change people fall in and out of love through out relationships. There's temptation and down the road I'm scared of him cheating when were 30, 40, or 50. I don't beleive in affairs and I don't think I could be in a marriage with someone who cheated on me. Doe's it always happen at least once in everyones marriage? Is it something you accept with marriage. People change I'm scared!

Answer 1

Character does not change - so help each other, grow with each other, love each other - you can do it - it does happen!

Answer 2

If you have a lot of things in common and have left the wild life behind there is no reason to think that his past will necessarily be part of his future. You say you have a child already so I guess that you were not totally committed to the first relationship either. If you have known eachother for a few years and you feel strongly about being together and making a lifelong bond through marriage I see no reason you can't make it work. See a marriage counselor or pastor for counciling to be sure your goals fpr the future are the same before you take the plunge. I know plenty of people who have made long term and solid committments to eachother that have lasted over 30 years. I do have to say though that they have always made church a priority and have pulled together when the inevitable hard times come. You just have to agree that you will honor those vows and that divorce is not in your vocabulary.

Answer 3

No, it doesn't happen at least once in all marriages. There are some people that care about that person too much & the thought of cheating is terrible enough for them. I don't understand the point of cheating. If there comes a time in a marriage when someone doesn't feel right being with that person, divorce is better than sitting there & coming home every night, knowing you've been unfaithful.

People change, so your fiance could be completely trustworthy. However, a lot of things don't change 100%. You just have to keep your eye open.

Answer 4

Lisa, being in a relationship with someone is scary. Married or not, it still is scary. There's nothing or no one in this world, that doesn't change. What I believe is that, having been given a chance to be with the man you love most is something that you have to cherish everyday. There's no guarantee that he will not cheat on you. But to be happy with him and your child everyday, is something you should try to accomplish and think about.
Don't worry too much. He looked like he is trying his very best to make your marriage work. So, help him. Act as if he will never be the womanizer everybody thought of him. Make him feel you believe in him and he is your superman.
You are the most important person now in his life. So make him feel you love him and will always be there for him.

Answer 5

Marriages can work, they just take a total commitment from both parties to making it work. Be sure he is as commited to making it work as you are. Cheating doesn't always happen in every marriage, but every marriage takes hard work. Your fiance needs to know that is something that you cannot accept and that you will not tolerate. As long as you both go into it with the attitude that divorce is not an option unless there has been infidelity or abuse, that you can work through anything (and you can) even if it means counseling. People that "fall out of love" can "fall back in" with work. It helps if you are of the same religion and go to church, mass or whatever together. It helps to have a higher power to help when things get tough...and they will...but you can get through it.

Answer 6

No it does not happen in every marriage. It's hard for a leopard to change his spots...not that it can't happen..but you are having doubts for a reason. Maybe you know in your heart it's going to happen to you? Just be wise and careful, yes I do believe marriage is supposed to last forever and I know mine will because we are very happy with each other and knew it was 100% right before we married each other. If you are having any doubts, you need to wait. It's much easier to take your time and think about things then to go through a painful divorce or painful marriage later. good luck

Answer 7

Where did you get the statistic about marriages that last being 49% ? research it a bit more my dear.

If he has a past of being a womaniser his thirst wont stay quenched for long unless you work your tail off keeping him amused so just keep the loving coming physically , emotionally , mentally and food wise , keep communication's open and be honest with him he'll stay this way , close him out , cut him off , start thinking about your own needs 1st and the womaniser will return out of sheer insecurity within himself.

With all the doubt's your showing through your words here though I am guessing your a pessimist and being that in a marriage is security risk at the starting line .Go see a councilor singularly and deal with your issues so that your husband gets the wife he deserves.Good luck.

Answer 8

well i think that the guys that have a history of sleeping around (and girls for that matter) only do it til they find the right person. i've known a lot of ppl like this who have had many partners until they find the 1 they click with then they settle down so if u & ur guy r meant 2 b together then neither u or him will ever cheat. i like to believe it's a soulmate thing. kinda like kissin a lot of frogs to find the prince.
i'm engaged too, neither me nor him thought about it before until we met each other & thing that marriage should still be a lifelong commitment only to be taken when u r 100% sure.
have faith, things dont always go wrong.
congratulations on your forthcoming wedding!

Answer 9

Lisa do not allow yourself to be so fearful prior to marrying this man. If you say that he has changed his way he indeed has. Family values, faithfulness etc. are once again returning to married life I like to believe anyway. Cheating certainly does not happen in all relationship, although it may appear that way as you hear of it but not the relationships that have remained honest with each other. As long as you and your partner keep an open line of communication with one and other and are able to speak your mind whenever you need things will be fantastic for you both. Best of luck and I wish you many happy years of marital bliss with this man you have chose to walk down the aisle with.

Answer 10

A rather long-winded diatribe and preamble to such a short question, don't you think? If your question was "Do affairs happen in all marriages?", then the answer has to be no, because "all" is rather hard to achieve. It MAY happen in a signifigant number of marriages, and how YOU react to it IF it happens in yours is completely your decision. You are right, people DO change, YOU will change, HE will change. How those changes manifest themselves, and how you adjust to the changes in each other (Or don't) will be the determining factors in your marriage. You can go through life scared, or you can go through life boldly. Your choice.

Answer 11

I wouldn't stay in a marriage if I found of my spouse has cheated on me. I believe there are some marriages out there that can last a lifetime with no infidelity involved, a small percentage but it is possible. I believe my marriage will be one of them and I have no reasons to believe it not to be. Going on strong for 8 years....