I've been married for 4yrs and my husband and i have sex MAYBE one time per month. Also, when we do have it, he has premature ejaculation.So, it is hell for me.I've given up always looking for him sexually, he always denies me and it hurts me so much and tells me "no"because he's stressed out or tired (which is always). So I don't look for him anymore, i just wait when he wants (which is almost never). We had many fights over this,i asked him in many ways how and why is like this. He hates the topic so we haven't spoken about it since. I'm sexually frustated.Also, i'm starting to pay more attention to men interested in me. Since for my husband, i am invisible or made of wood. I want my marriage to work, but i'm also considering divorcing him because of this. I am not happy. It is not only sex, but i feel whatever i do,i am invisible for him. He is cold, he doesn't talk to me. We can be in the same room and say nothing. I try talking to him but he either nods or yes/no answer. (Sigh)
2007-10-19 09:55:04 · 24 answers · asked by Magia 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'll give the usual dumb answers i see here,, Remember your vows for better or worse, sex don't mean anything in a marriage it's just a luxury if you get any that is, and what ever you do run far away from the men who show you attention and last but not least get a divorce etc etc etc... Honey do what feels right for you if you want to have a fling by all means do it if you want out get a divorce i will be the last person to judge you in what ever you choose to do it's your life live it
2007-10-19 10:11:06 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
He is insecure about his performance. Guys put a lot of pressure on themselves to be good performers. If he know he has issues with premature ejaculation, it could very well scare him away from the idea of having sex. It's a very self destructive behavior but it is easy for some guys to fall into.
I suffered from premature ejaculation when I was a teenager. I combatted this by having more and more sex. I eventually developed the control I desired. It takes practice.
Maybe if he thought he was really wowing you in bed, he might be more motivated to have more fun in bed. I'm not suggesting that you fake orgasms or lie to him saying that lousy sex was good. How about giving him oral pleasure? Maybe after he shoots a load, he will be able to last a little longer if he tries again after a 20-30 minute break.
If he is unwilling to work with you on this, he eventually will drive you into the arms of another man. It is good that you are questioning this now. Try to get this issue resolved soon. Because if you don't, you will grow to resent him for neglecting you. That's exactly what type of behavior he's displaying, you realize: neglect. It is damaging to your mind and emotions to endure neglect for long periods of time.
2007-10-19 10:10:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Maybe he doesn't like to have sex with you because he knows he has premature ejaculation problems. Have you ever looked at it that way? Do you know how stressful this problem can be for a man? Try to help him instead. If this is a big issue for a woman, imagine what it's like for a man.
Don't pay attention to other men. You have your man and he needs your help. Or divorce him if you want to. but don't cheat.
2007-10-19 10:21:14 · answer #3 · answered by Mandibulin 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Honey, I feel for you. There is nothing more frustrating than a whopping minute of sex - gets you going and then leaves you hanging. I am wondering if maybe has has a medical problem causing this lack of interest. If he takes medication already, that could be causing it. Some anti-depressants do that, as well as high blood pressure meds. If he goes to the doctor and they find nothing, perhaps a counseling session. The one thing I recommend is sitting him down and talking openly about how you feel. If he knew how badly you feel about your relationship because of this, then perhaps he would work on it with you. I would make sure and tell him that you love him very much and make sure you are not attacking or accusing him. Somehow I think you believe he is doing this on purpose,but I don't think he is. There is an underlying cause and you need to get to the bottom of it or else be prepared for a divorce. I wish you luck. And, there are tools that can help you out in the interim...just a suggestion. Take care
2007-10-19 10:13:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Premature ejaculation is caused by specific things that you do before and during sex. Most of the time without even realizing it. Read here https://tr.im/zoTpI
Premature ejaculation is not some gene you're born with, the result of your penis size or a part of your personality that you can never change.
2016-02-13 19:53:25 · answer #5 · answered by Drew 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried suggesting you and him should see a marriage counselor? Just because he has shinned away from sex doesn't mean he should treat you like that.. Do you think there is someone else? Alot of men get to a certain point where they aren't interested you never said his age so it depends, maybe suggest you and and him both go see a doctor there is Viagra///..
Second, if he won't talk to about it then tell him there are something you want to say to him and tell him exactly how you feel and maybe bring up separating for awhile and that there are needs you have and you have bee patient with him but if there is something wrong it needs fixing..Or last resort divorce..
I feel for you and I know the feeling..
Good luck.
2007-10-19 10:08:44 · answer #6 · answered by Denise T 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I use the Vydox product referred to by that Edward LeBlanc doctor guy on here, and it works like a Charm. For some time I was unable to achieve a decent hard-on.. and if I did, it was ever rarely fully erect. On top of that, I would always ejaculate after only a few minutes of stimulation. It was embarrassing as fvck. One day I remember seeing a commercial on TV talking about Vydox, which sparked my interest. They only charge S&H for the first Month's supply to test it out. So I did. I haven't had much of any problem since. I hear doing these things called "Kegal" exercises can also help a great deal.
2015-02-05 06:36:30 · answer #7 · answered by calista 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Permanently Stop Premature Ejaculation Tonight - http://EjaculationTrainerGuide.com/?zKhb
2016-03-31 18:16:00 · answer #8 · answered by Armida 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like you know what you need to do just by admitting your not happy. Things are only going continue this way till you decide to confront him with how you feel. But if he is as cold as you say, he may not care. You have to decide what's best for you. It sure looks like there is more here going on here then lack of his sex drive and premature ejaculation.
2007-10-19 10:08:52 · answer #9 · answered by jbolt5491 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Greetings. My name's Edward LeBlanc, an M.D in the field of Sexual Health. (Both Men and Women's) .. I find that in most cases, these issues can be remedied with Therapy. Generally, most ED conditions result not from blood circulation problems, but rather we often find a deeper root cause. Most cases of ED tend to be caused by performance anxiety, trust, or some other intimacy deficit occurring between you are your partner. That being said, if we do recommend anything, we only recommend natural solutions. We advise against using any narcotics for this purpose.
When using narcotics, you risk developing addiction and dependency. We always point our patients in the direction of Vydox - https://vydox.im .. Their mixture of ingredients is particularly potent where L-Argenine is concerned. L-Argenine is an amino acid, often revered as nature's most potent remedy for ED. Our office has received consistently positive feedback on it's effects. I believe they still send out a 30 Day trial supply, only asking that you cover the cost of shipping.
Regards
2015-02-09 14:15:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋