Back in feb I decided I needed to end a friendship of over 10 years. The circumstances surrounding that event are very complicated and would take too long to explain. But basically I felt like I was being used and that a friendship that brings so much drama and turmoil to your life just isn't worth it. The problem is that she has some rather expensive items that belong to me and my husband. These are things we loaned her or didn't have room for at our place and shared with her. For months my husband has been in touch with her and her husband and they have been giving excuse after excuse as to why we can't have these items back. It's really ridiculous that they are trying to keep things that never belonged to them out of spite. Is there any way we can get them back? Or do we just hope that what goes around comes around? By the way, we're neighbors. Add insult to injury!
2007-10-19 05:52:38 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Great answers to all! I think I may just have to send a detailed certified letter and see what happens. Then either I'll just let it go or try small claims court. I don't have reciepts for these items . 2 were gifts from other people and I guess I could have them write a letter stating that is the case. Just a lesson learned I suppose.
2007-10-19 06:06:52 · update #1
Since your husband has been actively talking with them and they have refused to give the items back, your only option may be court. Depending on the value of these items, it may be as simple as Reconciliation Court (where you just go before a judge and plead your case; think Judge Judy without all the yelling).
I am sorry the friendship went sour, but I commend you for your ability to walk away from a relationship that was hurting you.
Good luck!
2007-10-19 05:57:42 · answer #1 · answered by Gauffsa 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been in a similar spot. Problem here is weather or not you can prove they have your stuff, do you have papers they signed saying they borrowed this stuff or receipt's proving it's your stuff?
I would keep at them, send them a letter by registered mail listing all the items (keep a copy of this letter for yourself) that you want back and a deadline date to return them by or you will be forced to seek legal recourse to obtain these items. Then while your waiting for that date to come or the stuff to come seek a lawyers advice, chances are without proof you can't have a police officer just stand there as you collect the stuff yourself (easiest situation) but you can take them to small claims court which usually doesn't cost too much (make sure if you do you stipulate they pay the fees for this if the judge finds in your favour.)
Good luck!!
>>FYI; do the registered letter, you can't prove squat with a phone call, the letter will not only show the court, lawyer and cops (if they end up involved) what you lent to these people BUT if they don't bother responding to it then the couple is in effect agreeing they have these items in their possession (admission via silence). I would also make sure you list prices beside each item, estimate if your not sure. Eg: TV - $300, BBQ - $130 you get the idea...
2007-10-19 06:00:17 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I went through the exact same situation with my best friend of 13 years. She had lots of my very expensive clothes and other things so I asked her to leave it on her porch and I'd be there in 5 minutes to pick it up but she left and didn't leave them out. So then I called her back and said if she didn't give me my belongings than I will be forced to press charges and then she can just pay me the $5,000 (the amount all of the clothes were worth). I know it sounds ridiculous, but it worked because she didn't want to deal with the thought of me taking her to court and she let me in the house to get all of my things.
Since they are making excuses, just call them and say I'll be over in 5 minutes to get my things and it will not take me long at all. And go over there immediately since you know they are home. They can't make up that many excuses when you are standing on their doorstep to get your things. If they still refuse, tell them you will settle it in a civil suit and call the police- they will most likely hand everything over then to avoid court fees and what not.
2007-10-19 06:00:06 · answer #3 · answered by Madison 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you can try small claims court, but you need to be able to prove the items are yours. Otherwise take it as a hard lesson learned.
I like jmillers idea. If you have to just say the items were stolen and that you suspect your neighbors did it and give good discriptions of the items. Its worth a shot if you have the nerve.
2007-10-19 05:57:27 · answer #4 · answered by Jacob's Mommy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either you, or your husband, be honest and calm; tell them you're getting tired of the excuses, and that you don't want to, but if they don't give them back very soon, you'll request police assistance. I think that's the most gentle way, which still actually works in most cases, and surely better then waiting for what is not likely to come.
2007-10-19 06:10:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok well if you really dont like them i have a horrible idea. if you still have the reciepts from buying the items then you should call the police and tell them that your neighbors stole your stuff. im not saying to do this but its always and option. you should go to their house brage the door down and take your stuff. or have a friend go over there for a visit and have them take it while they are there, you friend can tell your ex friend that you said she can borrow them. hope this helps.
2007-10-19 05:58:51 · answer #6 · answered by Boston 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well since you're neighbors...go over there, walk in and proceed to take your stuff. It's yours have at it...LOL, just kidding. On a more serious note, call your local police and tell them what's going on. Chances are, the police will call them and instruct them to give the stuff back or they will be in a civil suit. If they don't return the stuff, proceed to court.
2007-10-19 05:58:50 · answer #7 · answered by ~*~Stephanie Dianne~*~ 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok.... An insult... Well......... Shes really using her. I never curse!
1. Maybe your neighbors, just wanna know you better... and all they have are your loaned items, to get to know you.. Or tell you'll call the police. If this gets beyond the circemstances.
2007-10-19 06:01:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow...sounds like you defo did the right thing letting her friendship go...both of you just go round and be firm...say im sorry we couldnt be friends but i want my stuff back thanx...face to face they will struggle with an excuse...be nice about it too...
if you dont get them back then i would call the police and get them back that way...really tough being neighbours..how awkward will that be..you cant let them do this to you tho...really out of order.x
2007-10-19 05:59:02 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Time to go to small claims court.
2007-10-19 06:01:06 · answer #10 · answered by missstaceymartin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋