Here's the situation...My boyfriend and I have been together for about 9 months now. We live together. We love eachother very much. I know I've never felt like this toward anyone ever before. I feel like I need him and I would die without him, and he says he feels the same way. The problem is that we are both VERY hard-headed and we both always have to be right. And neither of us like to be told what to do. This causes many fights. Almost daily!! I am usually the one to give in, and apologize even when I didn't do anything wrong...just to get him to pull the stick out. Every fight ends up being huge...like we are ready to end our relationship. The hard part is that when we aren't fighting, it's pure bliss. I've never been happier with anyone. And he is a great dad to my daughter, who lost her biological father years ago. Does anyone have any advice on how to make getting along easier? I absolutely want to make this work with him, because I love him more than life itself.
2007-10-19 04:33:52 · 7 answers · asked by Nicole G 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Get counseling. You really shouldn't have moved in with him after such a short time, now your daughter has to go through your getting to know each other process. That is hard on you, can you imagine how she feels???
2007-10-19 04:41:42 · answer #1 · answered by kitkat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You could ask him (before the next argument) to sit down because you would like to talk. Let him know you realize you are both hard-headed.... and instead of arguing you would like to stop the fighting... and DO tell him you love him more than anything, and that you have never been happier.
you could suggest sitting down when there is a disagreement, taking a deep breath, and then trying to come to some agreement. COMPROMISE is sometimes what you have to do, if you can't come to a mutual agreement.
Say one of you wants to go to the beach, but the other wants a picnic in the park. Well, instead of fighting, maybe you can do both things, just on separate days.. that way, both of you will be happy. It's just a small example of compromise, but you probably see what i mean.
Please, don't be the fall guy and apologize when you have not done anything wrong. It's insane to take blame when you don't have to... and it's not healthy.... if no apology is necessary, then do not do it!! Instead, you can say "it's unfortunate we had to argue"... or "i feel arguing isn't healthy" -- express the way you feel, instead of apologizing.
take care and i hope you two can have a good talk about this issue. it will be a step toward mending the issue. and don't forget to let him know you really want to work on this... and i hope he agrees!
2007-10-19 05:25:34 · answer #2 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You guys need to see a counselor. Whit out that i don't see you guys making it. The fighting will only get worse until you seek some type of help. Good luck
2007-10-19 04:39:05 · answer #3 · answered by ranger33 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well if you love him that much, don't fight with him any more & even if he's wrong just ignore it, see both of you are very stubborn & one has to give in I mean give-up being stubborn & be responsible usually its a man job to grow-up & all but in your case you have to ignore the fights
2007-10-19 04:43:56 · answer #4 · answered by MAYA k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a control issue.
2007-10-19 04:40:18 · answer #5 · answered by cooter726 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
yep, and i say this form expirience, " you have to learn to pick your battles!!!!"
if you want this relationship to last, you have to be submissive. dont argue just to get the last word in the matter.
this will prevent you from alot of arguments.
good luck
luv.•Â´ ¸.•*´¨) â.(¯`•.•Â´Â¯)
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2007-10-19 05:02:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
why in the world are you telling each other what to do? give and take baby
2007-10-19 04:45:09 · answer #7 · answered by love2dance 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋