2007-10-18 18:09:04 · 39 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
Why didn't Osama Bin Laden have sex with his wife?
Because everytime she opened her legs he saw Bush!
2007-10-18 18:11:14 · answer #1 · answered by ? 6 · 12⤊ 2⤋
You know if you are depressed, anyone can make you laugh but relieving the pain inside you can't be taken by just laughter alone. You need to face whatever makes you low and accept whatever the result of that action because this laughter is only temporary in which will become a part of our lives that makes us what we will be in the future. haha... so dramatic isn't it?!? Just laugh and be with your friends or family...
2007-10-18 18:21:07 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you're legitimately depressed, you don't want to deny those feelings because they'll just come back later. So how about sad humor:
Veal: the other sad meat.
Suicide Hotline Please hold... (please stay on the ledge for the next available operator...)
Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding a half eaten worm in your apple.
A man finds a lamp and rubs it. A genie comes out and says: "I can grant you one wish and ONLY one wish."
The man wishes for infinite wisdom.
"It is granted" says the Genie.
At that moment the man realizes he should have wished for money.
2007-10-19 18:31:19 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry I wasn't here when you asked this question last night but I am here now!! I'm not good at remembering jokes but I can remember this!! I am here and I'm throwing a whole bunch of hugs and smiles your way, catch, don't miss em cause they are just for you!! Smile, I'm sure you've got a beautiful smile!! I also topped those off with a Star just for you!!
2007-10-19 06:28:54 · answer #4 · answered by Ginny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes....
First of all.... Life is wonderful! Campfires, movies with friends, the smell of roses......
People like me that never met you, care, because you sound real!!
Ok, I'll try to make you smile...
A woman finished golfing and went to the course bar afterwards to celebrate a decent golf score.
She told the men sitting at the bar that she's considering quitting the sport. She said that she got stung by a bee between the first and second hole, and didn't want that to happen ever again.
One man said, "Oh, I know what the problem is, your stance is too wide."
Sorry.....But you smiled!!
Guy G
.
2007-10-18 18:23:38 · answer #5 · answered by appsptspcl 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It’s from my heart to my fingers, to your eyes and your mind.
Simple words from a friend are what you may find.
A good night wish, sweet dreams, from me to you.
This you should know, my wish is true.
If you look closer you'll see that I care.
I send you this message because I can't be there.
Smile!
It's a lovely message to a lovely person;
from a lovely friend on a lovely reason,
at lovely time from a lovely mind,
in a lovely style to say have a lovely time
with Lovely Jesus around you all the time.
Can you appear for dinner in Kampala Uganda East Africa?
Let me know.
Tel. +256 751 597 374
Jackson Muyonga
2007-10-19 08:12:55 · answer #6 · answered by Jaykson M 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
One time I ordered a Cold Cut Combo from Subway, and on the way out I dropped the sandwich and slipped on the plastic bag. As I went down I grabbed the chip rack and pulled it down with me. I sat on my Cold Cut Combo and popped open a bag of Cheetos with my big behind. No worries though, I bought the Cheetos, scooped them up into my bag with the Cold Cut Combo, and had a nice lunch after all.
2007-10-18 18:15:50 · answer #7 · answered by zipzeronada 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Go to bluemountain.com Go to the "talking ecards" you can write in your own text and watch a hamster, dogs, etc. say crazy stuff. I just got through having a good laugh at it myself
2007-10-18 18:12:36 · answer #8 · answered by zetty 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
:)
Q: When is a farmer like a magician?
A: When he turns his cow to pasture.
Q: Why did the farmer call his pig "Ink"?
A: Because it was always running out of the pen.
=) We are here to put a smile in your face. Cheer up, dear!!:)
Have a great week end!:))))
2007-10-18 18:37:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok im standing on my head trying to eat a cup cake my face is a mess my dogs trying to lick the chocolate and my dog just cut gas lol just kidding cheer up were all your friends oh one more thing im pregnant lol im a man dont know how to cheer you up but if i bake you a cake will you be happy
2007-10-18 18:35:58 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I guy walks into a pyschiatrists office wearing nothing but a pair of shorts made out of cling film.
THe pyschiatrist takes one look at him and says
"I can clearly see your nuts!" Boom-tish!!
Haha sorry.. I tried!
Maybe you can picture me yesterday when I was talking to my boss and sneezed suddenly without covering my mouth properly and spat chewing gum accross the room...! :os
2007-10-18 18:13:51 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋