A struggle in marriage?

Question

In my marriage I had to struggle and work hard and so has my husband. There was a time were were working all together 3 jobs just to make ends meet. We followed God we waited until we were married and followed Gods principles yet for a long time life was hard.

Yet I have known couples who were very cavalier about marraige and casually living together and treating God as an option not as a priority yet they materially and fiancially propser.

My question is growing up I was fairytaled to death that if I waited to have relations until I was married I would be blessed.
I have had a lot of hardhsips in the last 7 years? What to make sense of what I feel and how can I go forward and stop leaning on my own understanding? Have you ever felt that the wicked prosper and have you felt this was unfair?

Answer 1

i know what you're saying but you cant compare what you have to some one else.
they may not work hard for what they have and they may seem to have it easy but you dont know what happens behind closed doors.
all of the hardships you have experienced may not be fair for one person to have to go through so much but almost everyone has had to go through hell and back at one point or another.
i know that my family has had its fair share of struggle and even though it seems infair at the time, it makes us who we are.
we come out on top, stronger than before.
you are blessed. you have a wonderful husband who could have easily walked out when times got tough but he stuck by you.
god is testing you every day and each struggle means that he is there watching which path you take and how much faith you truely have.
be thankful that you are ok and stop comparing yourself to others.... the grass isnt always greener on the other side.
my hubby and i are pretty well off. by that i mean we have a roof over our heads, we both have jobs earning what we can, we have our health and have been blessed with a child (im 13weeks pregnant!!!!).
i would love to have more money so we could relax abit more but we have been given plenty and im so grateful for everything i have.
just keep praying and god will make it easier.
i have also heard that god never gives us more than we can bare.... you will get through whatever you are forced to face if you have faith.
if you need to talk to someone about anything, feel free to email me.

Answer 2

This shou8ld probably belong in the Religion and Spirituality board, and there are a few comments here that seem to focus more on your failing religion than on marriage.

Being an atheist, and in a rather successful marriage with very few problems, why would you label me as "wicked"? I thought you were not supposed to judge, lest you be judged yourself or some such? This is the point where many atheists would start making fun of your religion, but I don't think one wrong deserves another.

Having said that, you appear to be at a point where you can either rely on your religion and deal with the unfairness in whatever way God is willing to help you, or you can take responsibility for your marriage and situation and do something about it.

Fortunately the two options are not mutually exclusive. I think you were fooled into believing that God will do everything for you. Even with a strong faith I doubt anyone would believe that. You're supposed to work at life, work to achieve, and don't expect God to give you handouts. You're there to do His work, not the other way around, right?

Answer 3

Do you remember that part where Jesus was at the tax collectors home having a good time and his follower thought he was doing wrong by being there . Just love God and live and let live . You don't have to be a saint your only human . God loves them just as much as he loves you no more no less . Try being happy that's what god wants from you . Smile and the world smiles with you.

Answer 4

Yes, I feel that way a lot. But the Bible says the the first will be last and the last will be first. One day, you will be first. Don't give up on the promises of God. Look up Dave Ramsey on line. He is a Christan debt counselor and he can teach you how to get out of debt and enjoy being a prosperous Christian.

Answer 5

Honey, you are totally hitting the nail on the head. Here is the thing that we all must remember. heavenly father wants all of us to return to him and if you keep on that straight and narrow then someday it will come around. My wife and I struggle everyday and we have seen the near end of the whole thing. But we love oneanother and that is what is right and what will some day make me rich and prosper better than anyone else. good luck and hope that you stick with the hard, because it is the hard that makes it great!

Answer 6

oh yes,i sure have .this very question pops up in me to.but I always here that scripture saying they will have there reward.we have to remember yes we want some blessings here but the blessings that we work for are eternal .wordly goods and possessions are temporal.God will reward those who has deligently seeked him you will have your reward.sometimes we just have to look at the long term reward.I also believe God will let us exprience prosperity and goods here on earth so we can compare,in which the bible saids that it will not be able to but we have to have something to compare.be not weary in well doing you will reap if you faint not.so hold on ,don't faint.maybe your wealth is spiritual,maybe the fruits of the spirit.these are better to have than any wealth:love,joy,peace,long suffering.you might have those instead of wealth in the natural.think on those things and what you have in christ,because those people with the wealth and without God will have arude awaking one day.be blessed and realize that it is you who has the wealth in christ Jesus who is more precious than gold and who is the author and finisher of our faith.

Answer 7

Maybe you each should get one decent job? I mean it is not hard to have a decent living, when two people work, unless you have a lot of kids.

What was your life like before a marriage? Marriage in general should change your financial situation. You should have definitely waited with the kids.

It also sounds that you got married being way too young. You should have read less of fairy tales. You don't get blessed because you get married. By the way, are you a mormon?

Answer 8

Unfortunately, your being true to yourself and what you believe in does not guarantee an easier life. Now I am not one to preach about living a morally perfect life; I only wish I had waited until marriage, and I commend you for that. However, I believe strong people like you are actually given a more difficult lot to deal with...because you are better equipped to handle it than those of us that are weaker.

Perhaps the blessings you have hoped for are not for this world?

Answer 9

Of course! You have remember that sometimes struggle is the will of God. He's sees you through the struggle because he is walking with you as you go through it. Great sex is not based upon the fact that you waited until you were married, it's based upon the relationship between the two people. Don't judge yourself by others. Remember "his thought are higher than our thoughts", and he knows the plans he has for you. Be blest.

Answer 10

Without a doubt it's irksome to see the undeserving waltz through life, but there's a lot to be said for struggling. For one, you'll have far better memories and greater understanding, not just for material things, but for the value of life itself. People who have things handed to them are generally cheated out of the fundamental aspects of growing. In other words, they're clueless. As for financial success, it's necessary to understand that "it's not how much money you make that's important. It's how wisely you spend it."