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My friend & her husband got married & it lasted 3 months. HE wanted a big wedding (??) so HER family dished out $8,000. Before that, SHE paid $600 in cash (unfortunately) on HIS DUI. She has a 3-year old son from a previous marriage. Mind you, they are only 21 years old...but that is besides the point.

Present...
He left her one day while she was at work because he said "she nags too much." All he wanted to do was drink all night & not call home and check in like a responsible significant other. She cooked supper and catered to him on the couch on a daily basis; he had it made. He disrespected her and he has an anger problem. He claims he doesn't love her, he never did, and he didn't even have enough respect to call her and tell her why he left. NOW she is stuck with all the bills (rent and utilities) even though his name is on the lease. He says he will "stay married for 30 years" if he has too to avoid lawyers and legal fees. Is my friend entitled to justice or should she give up?

2007-10-18 08:07:26 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

The thing with the lease is...he moved home 2 hours away and she is left living there with her son. So if she defaulted on the lease, she would have nowhere to live?

2007-10-18 08:27:34 · update #1

They are also over a $1000 in debt TOGETHER.

2007-10-18 08:29:34 · update #2

25 answers

Your friend can get a divorce if he wants to or not. If he decides not to sign divorce papers, (it sounds like he won't) She will have to get a contested divorce, (they cost a bit more than an uncontested divorce) After she begins that process it is up to him-if he decides not to respond or get an attorney -she gets whatever she wants (within the law) If he decides to fight it as well, she will still be able to get a divorce (and she will have the satisfaction of knowing he had to shell out $$ for an attorney)

Anyway, tell her to start the divorce and forget about him !

2007-10-18 08:15:24 · answer #1 · answered by ashley g 4 · 0 0

She should count every lucky star in heaven that she only had to deal with him for 3 months and is getting rid of him before he really destroys her life.

She should do whatever she has to do to get out ASAP - especially since there is a child involved (thank God it's not his).

She's not going to get anything out of him anyway so why waste more money and time trying. While I'm sure she wants a reason from him, she got her reason before they married - he's a loser looking for a meal ticket.

She deserves way better and needs to take this opportunity to figure out why she is attracted to this type of guy so that she doesn't make the mistake again.

She will be happier in the long run.

2007-10-18 08:17:26 · answer #2 · answered by teel2624 4 · 0 0

bummer.

too bad she was so desperate to get married that she married this looser. sounds like a good woman if she treats him well in the bedroom too.

If his name is on the lease and hers isn't then it would be his problem if the rent isn't paid. if both names are on the lease she had better keep the rent paid or her credit will suffer.

call the Credit cards and have his name removed or hers and give them his address to send the bills to if she removes herself from the cards. They may freeze the acounts when she does this which is a good thing.

she needs to divorce him. pay the 1000 in debt and pay the lawyer, it will be cheaper than what it is going to cost when he decides to run up the bills and dump them on her.

2007-10-18 08:46:07 · answer #3 · answered by oldsoftee2001 6 · 0 0

She needs to check online (search Divorce and the state she lives in) State laws vary but if he has abandoned her she can get a divorce due to this. She can then take him to court and garnish his wages and even if the kid isnt his may be able to get child support from him. If nothing else she needs the marriage annuled and have her keep an eye open for any adultry he is no doubt commiting. The more proof of adultry and abandonement will get her more money.

2007-10-18 08:16:26 · answer #4 · answered by fortyninertu 5 · 0 0

He can try and stay married all he wants. She needs to go down and file for a divorce. Keep track of all he says to her and, what not. Even if he doesn't sign the papers the judge will only give him so much time before he says it is over and she can move on.

2007-10-18 08:13:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

In some states if he moves out it is called abandonment and she can fill for divorce on those grounds. And he can't stop her from doing it. Her and her Attorney can decide how much they want him to pay. I would not ask for alimony or child support. Just for the bills they jointly created. And her Attorney fees and Court cost. Which will be plenty.

2007-10-18 08:40:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

If his name is on the lease and on the bills, he will have to pay half of evreything while they were together. She needs to file for divorce right away, if she can't afford an attorney, she needs to contact a free legal-aid office. He will have to pay.

2007-10-18 08:14:08 · answer #7 · answered by Jayne Savage 7 · 2 0

What "justice"? Sounds to me like this guy has no money, and if your friend supported him HE may qualify for alimony from her. The only real thing she can do is break the lease and move out, if it is under his name they will go after him first. If she has records for the $600 she paid to get him off she could pursue that in small claims court. Other than that, she has no real action against him.

2007-10-18 08:13:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 2

No, she can file for divorce without him. She can also leave him to pay the bills etc. Especially if they are in his name. Tell her to hang in there. She probably won't get everything she wants. But he should have to split the bills and at least pay for half of the wedding since he split on her.

2007-10-18 08:20:45 · answer #9 · answered by Daybreak 5 · 0 0

She'll be able to get a divorce but it's imperative for her to get a good, attorney. She needs to cancel all their mutual credit cards and put a hold on their bank account.
He sounds like a weeney. Sometimes things we perceive as sad and hurtful turn out to be blessing in disguise. I'm betting this is one of those times.

2007-10-18 08:12:20 · answer #10 · answered by katydid 7 · 2 0

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