Do you forgive people from high school?

Question

When I was younger I pretty much went through 13 years of hell during my school years (K-12). 95% of the kids in school treated me like crap or just wouldn't even talk to me. Now that I've been graduated for a while I sometimes run into people that I went to school with. When they find out who I am they act like we're good friends or something. My general motto is "If you wouldn't talk to me then, I won't talk to you now." How many of you forgive the little kids and think that they grew out of it?
(I think that people don't change, they just learn to hide their more undesirable traits, but they're still there.)

Yeah, that's what I figured. The bullies that don't understand say to forgive. And the people that know what I'm talking about say not to.

Answer 1

I was reasonably popular, but still had people who didn't like me and those I didn't like, I have moved on and they seem to have too. That was kid stuff now were adults. As a Minister of some years and Psych major I can tell you people do change over time.

Move on with your life and forgive those childhood actions, you'll feel better. My mother never could do that and is quite miserable even in her eighties.

Answer 2

Well sorry you had to go through that. Honestly, I think it's all up to you and how you feel. Most teens make fun of other kids only because they are influenced by other friends. But when they graduate high school people tend to change and grow up to become a better person. So maybe they were evil back in the day but they've changed... so it's up to you weather you can forgive them or not.

Answer 3

It is best to forgive. It makes you feel better. I am not saying to hang out with these people and invite them over for a BBQ. Just take the high road and forgive them. Obviously there is something wrong with them to have treated you badly in school and now have the audacity to come up to you know like you are great friends. Do you see what I mean?

Answer 4

forgive yes...forget no, and if I were to run into someone I would not let the moment pass to talk about it and ask them why they were such idiots.

lmao..well guess what buster, you are dead wrong, I was the one being bullied...and badly. Why have it make you miserable til the day you die? It made me the strong don't eff with me person that I am today...and that I thank them for. But like I said...I don't forget, and would enjoy hearing their side of the story and seeing if they are still the effheads they were then. People do mature over time, some don't...most do.

Answer 5

I didn't go through hell in High School, but if there were people that I've encountered that I've never really spoken to before act like we're great friends then that would be odd to me. The most I would say to them is Hi, have a good day and be off my way, why start a conversation when you didn't know them before and expect that to change.

Answer 6

yeah that is so true.. all through my life.. everyone has made fun of me because i wasnt cool or i didnt have a boyfriend at that time.. i was the person they could make fun of and betray when they wanted..
in the end at graduation i studied so hard and got on distinction list leaving those stupid wankers shocked! since one of them got honors which is an 80 and i took a 90 plus..
as for forgiveness.. never!
yeah the saying is so true.. and yeah even though they now have me on facebook i still dunt give a damn about them..
they are not worth my time.. i am so happy that i have gone to college changed and become a woman with confidence and i have no shadows that i did in the past at high school. university is so much better than high school! :D

Answer 7

Being nice or civil to them doesn't mean they've changed - it means you have and that you are confident and secure enough to be the better person. Just because they treated you like crap doesn't mean you have to lower yourself to their level and treat them like crap now. Let it go, chances are they have realized what jerks they were and that's why they talk to you now. If they didn't change at all they wouldn't even bother talking to you - so give them the benefit and get over your past hurts somehow. Its not healthy to hold in anger or aggression. I'm sorry it was so bad then, but look how far you've made it now.

Answer 8

I been out of High school 22 years, last reunion I went to was the ten year, and I felt sorry for them, I remember our class trip was the first time most of them have ever gotten out of the state, and it still the same now for them, Sad part is I graduated from a class of 67 people and 9 are already dead.

Answer 9

I think that I am one of the people who would like to be forgiven. I was awful in high school...I was picked on in my first year there and realised that it was dog eat dog...so I became a bit of a mean girl. Now I have actually shed tears over the things I did and said....I made one girl so unhappy that she left the school....there were no repercussions for me as this was the late 80s and no one did anything about bullying then.

I feel so sad when I think of how cruel I was...those kids were probably tortured by me....all I can do is hope that they are having good lives now....the girl who left school because of me is....she's happily married and lives in France...so if you think about it, maybe the bullies who ruined school for you have regrets now. Sorry from me to all the kids I picked on...and sorry for you on behalf of those who made your life hell.

Answer 10

I think that when we are in high school people do and say dumb things, and if they are smart they grow up and realize the things they did way back when weren't right. They try to become better people as adults and teach their children that it isn't right to treat people that way. If not and they just turn into creepy adults then, I say it is there loss. I think everyone has some speacial quality they can offer someone. You were probably better off without them. Carma is a u know what.