i need to help my elderly mom get her finances in order?

Question

what steps to take and how to procede she has asked for my help i just dont know where to begin

Answer 1

I did this for my Uncle, and later, my Aunt. My Uncle was put into a Conservatorship and all finances had to be accounted to the Court on a regular basis.

The first thing that needs to be done is the checkbook needs to be in balance. I'm sure you know how to do this. Make sure that all checks have been deposited that should have been. If you don't have the time to do this yourself, a Bookkeeping Service will do this, for a charge.

Sit down and go through all immediate expenses such as utility bills, mortgage payments, etc., and make sure they are current. Make sure there is a sufficient food supply and current personal needs, such as soaps, toothpaste, and things of this type. Also, include medication expenses, this is imperative for her health. This is a part of making sure that your Mom is taken care of. This will also be a part of her ongoing expenses and must be taken into consideration and
must be included in future planning. A budget can be formulated.

Any outside insurances? Such as those from a former employer or husband. Some insurances are continued when a spouse retires and can really come in handy when reducing medical costs, some are in addition to Medicare. You'll need to check out the coverage, if this is the case. I would also review her Medicare coverage, just for your peace of mind.

Be aware of any investments. Up to date information should be obtained, if it is not currently available. If there are investments, you're going to want to check to see that all applicable taxes have been paid on dividends, etc. You probably will want to contact a Tax Specialist or Attorney if you suspect that there are delinquent taxes. You know that if there are, there will be penalties.

These are basics. A lot is going to depend on your Mom's health and fragility. It will depend on her mental capacity and whether or not she is able to physically conduct day to day business, such as trips to the bank, grocery, doctor appointments, etc.

You may want a General Power Of Attorney. And, for sure, you're going to want a Durable Power of Attorney for Medical Care and this can be found on the Internet for your particular State.

I don't know her particular situation, or age, therefore, it's difficult to predict whether this is just a case of not keeping up her records or inability to do so. Many Seniors get to the point where they don't balance checkbooks every month, believe me, I know this for a fact.

Should you need a Conservatorship for your Mom, see a Probate Attorney and have yourself appointed her Conservator. It won't make all of this easier. The Court will have specifics that must be done including all of the financial information listed above, plus a complete inventory of what she owns. You will be required to keep track of everything expended and have a Court Appointed right to do what is necessary for her well-being. There will be periodic financial audits for the Court. This is something your Attorney will explain to you, in full. Hopefully, you will not need to take this step, but I wanted you to know that it's there, just in case it's needed.

This will take some time and patience. It may be that your Mom just wants to get everything in order so that it will be easier for her to take care of, and I hope that's the situation.
Independence and self-sufficiency are important factors for most Seniors and sometimes it just gets overwhelming for them.

Thanks for your caring attitude for your Mom. I'm sure she appreciates it, and I know I do.

Answer 2

It's hard to answer a question like this not knowing more specifically what all is involved in her personal finances.

With that said, I would suggest as a good starting point to draw up a Financial Power of Attorney so the one appointed can make decisions and sign documents on her behalf. Needless to say whoever is appointed as PoA needs to be someone trustworthy, honest, and intimately knowledgable about your mom's wishes and desires, and generally what types of financial decisions she would normally make.

I'd be glad to discuss further if more detail is provided, or at least more specific questions were asked.

Answer 3

My parents got an Estate Planner. It was offered free through the senior citizen group. Usually they are retired lawyers etc. doing this for them.

My parents were not rich....so don't let the word "Estate" fool you. They were a literal God Send. You would not beleive how much easier and better they made things work.....no emotion....they ask basic questions...set up a budget...help with all the legal work and legal papers....resolve alot of issues if there's other siblings or family members in the picture. Open you to options....step in when you need help. It's a protection for you and for your mom. Literally.....I am not kidding......I absolutly LOVED the guy my parents were with. In fact I kept him and continued on with myself. I do have a fee since I am not retired......but you would not beleive the help they offer. As hopeless as things feel....these guys make it so easy. As confusing as it can get.....they help. There's very few things I support or stand behind.......but this is one thing I am 100% sold on. To me they were a tiny guardian angel over my shoulder....support like you wouldn't beleive. That is where I would start without a second thought. They have a way of talking to you and her about things that most people won't or don't. A perfect impartial party because they gain or loose nothing. They found "freezes" for things for my parents they didn't know about....then used that extra money to invest in burial planning.....all sorts of things. Check it out.

Answer 4

Are you male or female and
how old are you? Can you
keep your own finances in
order--easily?
If you don't know exactly what you are doing, I would suggest to go to the nearest Senior Center and ask. They will refer you to someone who
can get it all in order and
for a minimal cost.
If your mom truly can't handle her finances, she may
need a legal conservator.
Be careful tho as even
County conservators find a
way of gleaning the funds
into their own pockets.

Answer 5

It depends on what kind of financial assets your mother has, the best way to start is by getting all the paperwork sorted into piles. Cost-liabilities, investments- assets, active accounts, then go talk to the baker and get some help and advise. And while you are at it, dont forget all insurance policies that may help your mother pay for long term care. Good Luck.

Answer 6

This depends on what situation she now finds herself. If she does not want to give you power of attorney she should at least make you able to deposit into her bank account.
Power of Attorney would be the preferred method as you have permission to speak with all creditors and Dr.'s on her behalf.
Having done this for my father in law and in the process of helping my mother the first thing is to get all the mail. Sit down and sort it. Take the check book and after some figuring you should be able to stand where she stands financially. With my father in law by the time I got him sorted out we paid a bit over $8,000 to keep his home and pay off creditors. His $345 SS was left for utilities. I bought his groceries after that and fed him 2 meals a day. As he was not ready to live with us but did want the company. I bought his clothing, a television and a stereo as he loved to play his albums. Plus took his cat and two dogs to the vet and fed them.
My own Mother is not good with money and never has been one to watch her expenses.
She only wants me to be able to deposit into her bank account which is fine by me. After going through a tidy sum after my step Dad passed she then sold stocks and now 3 yrs. later I have put $1,000 in her account twice. After explaining I cannot continue to do this as my 30 yr. old neice, a 21 yr. old nephew and a 60 yr. old sister in law all live with her I have deposited $100 twice recently.
I'm trying to get across that the adults need to pay their own way.
If your mother lives alone your job should be easier. but I take it she is in difficulty or would not be asking for your help.
I hope Gold Wing answers this because he is most astute in money matters.
Good luck!

Answer 7

oh, I pity you, I took care of a elderly lady once , and she had 3 different bank accounts , she had the wrong checks in the wrong check book and was over drawn at the bank ,had shut off notice on all her utility's. So hopefully your mom has gotten to you on time ( of course our daughter thinks she should mind ours )ha ha