How do I tell someone I don't want to be there childs god parent?

Question

I am not trying to be callous or mean but I am 38 weeks pregnant and having my labor induced this sunday so I will be a mom on monday...this is my first child and I feel like I have my own baby to worry about...and then the person that asked me is my guys best friend I don't really know him all that well I do know that he has 2 chicks pregnant that don't know about one another and he has a child with a chick he lied to his ex wife about up until they seperated....I just don't want to get mixed up in all that how can I let him down gently?

Answer 1

I would try to tell them that you would take that honor very seriously and that you don't think you're up to doing it the way it ought to be done. You'll be too preoccupied looking after your own child to be the kind of god parent that your friend's child deserves.

Answer 2

This is a real tough one....
I would gently break it to them like this...
It is an honor for you to even consider me, but I personally believe that a God Parent's role is a very serious and life long commitment to the Godchild. I would love to say yes, but because I believe in how important this position is, I must, in good conscience, tell you that I do not feel comfortable that I would be able to perform the duties of that role properly, with everything going on in my life...
If that answer doesn't satisfy them, then be even more forth-right and tell them that God-parenting is a religious role, and that the Father's life choices are such that contradict your own beliefs religiously...
I Once told a very dear friend that I would not stand up in her wedding because I felt that her Fiance was to abusive, (they had lived together and he had been beating her), and that I felt that in order for my to stand up in the wedding I would be making a public statement that I support and approve of the marriage...and I did not...She was hurt, but she respected my honesty. We are still friends to this day, I didn't compromise my convictions, and she respects my opinions even more now.
Best Of Luck...And have a star....It's a good question.

Answer 3

Obviously his lifestyle is not the kids fault so I wouldn't refuse on those grounds ...this child could probably really use a straight headed adult in its life.

You have to turn him down based on your issues ...Tell him you'd like to have said yes but you're feeling really overwhelmed with the commitments of being a first time mum and your head is just too full right now

I think it's kind of weird he asked someone this pregnant to be Godmother ...its kind of like asking someone who's crossing Niagara Falls on a tight rope, to hold your backpack while you take a photo of the carpark.

You stick to your guns and say no thanks
Good Luck (c;

Answer 4

If you aren't the same religion, you could just tell him that you wouldn't be comfortable taking on the responsibility of potentially having to raise a child in a religion other than the one you belong to. One major part of being a God parent is making the agreement to do so if necessary.

Either way, you could just tell him that with the pending arrival of your own child, you're not ready to make such a commitment. Explain that you're not sure you could take on the responsibility of another child when you haven't gotten used to being a mommy to your own.

Answer 5

In my opinion I would tell him the exact reason why you don't want to do this. It is the plain old truth and maybe he'll see that what he does is wrong. I don't blame you for not wanting to be mixed up in somebody elses' drama. Whats next, will he be asking you to lie for him? Tell him you are not fond of the idea, since he is not settled down. Focus on your pregnancy and your child. hopefully these chicks will figure out this guy is scum.

Answer 6

Just tell him that you are not comfortable with the situation that he is in and you really dont want to be put in the middle of it seeing that you will have your own child to care for and dont need the drama that will come along with being the god parent to his child....

Answer 7

well first being a god parent dosnt mean you have responsiblity for the child. its something that is there for extreem reasons, for example, if something happened to the babies parents and there was no other living relative to care for the child, instead of the child going into the system, a god parent could take custody if they wished.
second, if you dont want to be, just tell her that you think that should be a position for someone a little closer to her to take and you dont feel comfortable doing it

Answer 8

Be cordial-just say thank you-you feel honored that he would ask you-but you have your own child to care for and are not sure that if something happened to him RIGHT NOW that you would be able to care for it. Or point out some flaw that you guys have-even if you have to make one up like-are you sure you want to leave it with us? we can't even stay up on our electricity bill. Good luck.

Answer 9

I would just tell him with your own baby you have alot on your plate and you aren't confident in becoming a godparent at this time. Since this is your first the motherly dutires are more overwhelming and new to you.

Answer 10

be honest and if you dont have the time to be a godmother its not right to if you know that you cant take care of that mans child them dont take that step now just let him know that it will be a good idea that he should find someone else because you dont think you are the right person for that job but thank you for thinking of me