Threesome?

Question

Ok, I've heard all of the "jealousy, it'll ruin your marriage" stuff, but I still want one! My husband has a friend that is just adorable & I fantisize about him and my husband in bed with me. My husbands up for it & his friend is single. I wouldnt mind having a threesome with a girl either. What do you think?

Answer 1

As long as it is both you and your husband's fantasy, and you are both secure in yourself, each other, your value to each other and thus your relationship in general than it not only won't ruin relationship, it could and probably will bring you closer together.

See, jealousy is neurotic insecurity. It is the fear that someone else will be preferred over you. If you know deep down that you are "it" for each other, and nobody else, much less any other sex organ can or will replace you in your spouse's heart, then you will not feel jealousy. A truly confidant person does not feel jealousy. In insecure person does.

Also, many will say things like "what if you prefer the other guy more?" or "what if your husband prefers the other woman more?" Well, I guess if a relationship is just sex, or sex is all your relationship is based on, then yah, better sex could cause someone to leave. If your relationship goes beyond sex and sex is just a part of it that, then sex has been given it's appropriate place in your life and no sex with someone else, not matter how good, would replace all the other things between you and your husband.

Think about it, unless you were both virgins when you met and you've never had sex with anyone else in your life, chances are you had some great sex with someone before. But, that great sex wasn't enough to make you want to continue the relationship. They didn't have all the qualities your spouse does as well as the great sex. Only your spouse is the whole package.

Too many people think sex is the be-all-end-all of a relationship, like it's the reason they are together, so they put sex up on an alter and worship it. This is also why after a few years when the lust starts to wear-off and the sex becomes less frequent or a passionate, people start having issues in their relationship and eventually cheat on each other to get that "lust" feeling back or they just end-up getting divorced.

So in short, if you know your marriage is based on more than just sex, that you could have good sex with an of millions of other people on this planet, but you're married to each other, and you are secure enough that the idea of your spouse having a good time sexually with someone else is a turn-on not something that makes you recoil in fear and disgust, you're cut-out for exploring your sex life and including others to help you do it. If that's not you then its best left a fantasy.

Answer 2

If you want to but that's up to you and your husband and you need to know that you guys are strong enough to make it through something like that.

Now the questions are what if your husband this girl sexin too much and now he wants to hit it without you around. Well he won't see nothing wrong with hittin it later because you did it with him so what's the difference. On top of that you won't convince a man that it's wrong since you gave him the go ahead. Next thing you know you are apart of your ex's threesome with his new wife which is your old friend. Do you really want that?

Do what you want but remember there are reprocushions.

Answer 3

Well, I think you might be thinking a little bit like we guys do.

We guys usually are able to separate love from sex, so we don’t really get jealous of just plain sex.

But you girls are usually different and have a big connection in your mind between love and sex, so if your guy gets busy with another woman, even when is just sex for pleasure and fun, you think he is cheating in your love relation.

But be careful, we guys also have actual feelings, and even when your husband thinks that he is up to it, after it happens, he might get jealous too. It just takes a little thing, like maybe his friend is bigger than him down there, and maybe you can get off better with his friend (and you probably will as you will be very excited with the whole thing). Then he will think about it and become jealous.

And could happen to you if you do it with another girl, you might end up mad because he kissed her very passionately and you think he might end up liking her better.

I won’t tell you not to do it because is obvious you want to and he wants to also. But before you do, sit down and have a serious honest talk with your man, and put reality over the table. Make sure you both understand all this little things that can become big issues later.

If you two understand for sure that it will be a night of crazy sex for fun and that everything is possible, and still, you two love each other no matter what, then go ahead whenever you two are ready.

One last thing, if you two decide to do it, then you have to choose who to do it with. Friends can be exiting as you said if you have fantasies about it, but don’t forget, fantasy is one thing, and reality is another.

Introducing a third partner in your sex life have the same effects on him or her as much as it could have with you two. Inviting some estranger is usually the option for people who does this because they know there will be no ties, like a one night stand.

And then comes STDs. If you do this with a friend, all of you could go and get tested to provide a safe environment, but would you all be willing to talk about all this and do the tests before getting busy? I doubt it.

And doing it with strangers is worse as you have no clue about that person. An option is the swingers clubs as usually they need to be tested before going in and also keep on providing proof. Of course those clubs are expensive to join, but if is your lifestyle, then it might be worth it.

Hopefully you two will find the solution together, and whatever you decide to do, make sure to be safe and have lots of fun!
Good luck.

Answer 4

Me and my husband have discussed it also and he wanted us to do it with one of his friends. But I'd prefer a stranger just because I wouldn't want my husband and his very close friend to have any issues down the road. Plus I would look at him way different after that! Maybe find a couple that you can both enjoy spending a little time with!

Answer 5

My husband and I have toyed with the possibility of a FFM, but I've not yet chosen to embark on it. I don't think we are mature enough to handle someone else coming into our bed. There will be severe jealousy issues, even if they are not readily apparent. He will probably wonder afterward if you thought his friend was better than he was. It will probably destroy his relationship with his friend. You may find yourself wanting this other man more than your husband after you have had a taste of him (you already have a crush on him).

Do what you want, but it's more likely to destroy your relationship than not. Good luck and I hope it works out.

Answer 6

It can be fun but things will change in your marriage after you guys do this, might be for the better might be for the worse you won't know until after.. I have did it in the past with two men be sure to try double penetration it's totally awesome been several years since the last time now i go FMF..

Answer 7

i think in the long run it causes more problems in your relationship than it's really worth. there was a lady on here the other day that wanted a threesome with another lady and her hubby agreed. well, when it came down to it, the lady wasn't into her as much as she was into her hubby and now she's all bent out of shape about it. sometimes fantasies are best left as fantasies.

Answer 8

You just have to be honest and mature. It is not for everyone. Just make sure that your husband is truly comfortable with it. If you are going to have 2 guys for you then 2 girls for your hubby is only fair as well. Have fun

Answer 9

I liken planning on having a threesome to playing with a pitbull.....

He might be nice and friendly, or he might bite your face right off.

Who would be willing to take a chance??!

Answer 10

It can work with another woman. But, with the other guy, you are going to destroy your marriage.

If you decide to take my advice, do not make it a "regular" thing. Have it once, and move on to someone else.

Reason: women are jealous and devious... if the other woman gets more than a little taste of your husband, she will ruin your marraife out of jealousy, or just to mess with you.