he was quiet and he listened to the whole story...then after like 15 mins he said he didnt know what to say or do cuz he has never come across an arranged marriage and doesnt know how they work...he did say that he wants to meet my dad and talk with him...but it bothered me that he wasnt more supportive.
could he be this way really cuz he doesnt know how arr marriages work or could it be lack of interest?
2007-10-18 03:27:03 · 23 answers · asked by kera 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You sound like you are living in lala land. Seriously. WHICH ONE DO YOU LOVE? Your question doesn't even make sense, because if you are definitely going to follow through with this arranged marriage then you should be smart enough to understand that your boyfriend isn't going to support it. And if you love your boyfriend, then you should SUPPORT HIM and understand more about the way he feels about this. Nope you make no sense at all. And your relationship must not be that great anyways for you to drop this bomb and expect it to not be a big deal. Hopefully your boyfriend will dump you immediately.
2007-10-18 05:23:03 · answer #1 · answered by nawailohiloi 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Persuade ure parents tht u love ure boyfriend, and tht if u end up with the guy who u are having an arranged marriage with, it may not work out. My cousin had the same problem, but she married her boyfriend in the end. At the time, she was 24 and the man she was having an arranged marriage was 32, but her boyfriend knew her since she was 15, both the same age, then they were friends and then boyfriend and girlfriend. 5 Years on now, theyre both 29, and expecting their 2nd child!!
Persuade ure parents, marry ure boyfriend!!!
2007-10-19 17:10:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry for saying this, but are your parents brother and sister?
Isn't it kind of obvious that he's not gonna be supportive of this? His girlfriend is being married off to someone else! My boyfriend would be furious, and get his dad to drive him two hours to come get me.
The whole idea of arranged marriage is just cruel to me, I really think so. I mean, unless the two like eachother, but did you say, "Yes, I will marry this person?"
I suggest you think really hard about this. Tell your parents if you do or do not want to marry the person they found, and if you do, tell your boyfriend. He'll be upset, yes, but in the end, he should be happy if you are happy.
2007-10-18 11:36:38 · answer #3 · answered by Regna . 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
By supportive I hope that you mean he wasn't supportive on taking you away from an arranged marriage so you two can still be together. If you are planning on following through with this arranged marriage then you don't have "support" coming to you. You said he wants to talk to your dad, so be supportive and tell your dad no way.
2007-10-18 10:41:08 · answer #4 · answered by Fergy 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You've just told your bf that it might be over between you two. Perhaps your bf's waiting for you to say the words "I don't want to marry the man my parents have arranged for me, I want to be with you". Or maybe he's waiting for: "Well it was nice, but now I'm going to follow my parent's wishes. There's no future for you and me". So which is it? If you're happy to accept the arr marriage, he won't stay in your way.
2007-10-19 05:24:57 · answer #5 · answered by blackhole 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well, at an early age.. I already encountered that problem... And with your boyfriend... I guess he really needs a further explanation... But I appreciate the thing that he wants to talk to your father... I think it's his one way of showing his concern to you even though its not that obvious... As of my part, I really didn't care about it considering that the guy that my parents arranged for me is a band member and girls are over him...And I also have my boyfriend... I told him about it, at first it was also like your boyfriend's answer... but we try to talk about this matter seriously and fixed everything up... As for you.. You don't need to worry because... You will just recover this thing... It's not that he doesn't show concern but I think he needs a time to think things and to understand what is really the real deal... Just remember this; everyhting happens for a reason and if you're really destined for each other then no matter what problems you encounter... You can overcome with this...
2007-10-18 10:50:31 · answer #6 · answered by SHEENA D 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
what do you expect from him exactly?? the idea of an arranged marriage is abhorrent to most western people. not only that, but you have just told him that he's girlfriend is going to marry some one els. if I were him i would just walk away from you. i have no idea why you people come here to live if you dont want to be part of a civilised world.
2007-10-18 10:55:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
he's obviously disapointed cuz he probably doesn't even feel like he's your boyfriend anymore if you're already talking about your future marriage with another guy your dad picked out. i mean he probably feels like he shouldn't even bother and is pretty upset. i think hes the one who needs supporting honey.
2007-10-19 23:35:46 · answer #8 · answered by ELizabeth J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's probably that he cares for you, but realizes if you go through with what your parents are insisting upon, you guys can't possibly ever work out.
If you are in the states, you legally do not have to marry anyone just because your parents tell you to. I wouldn't if I were you.
He probably wants to talk to your dad because he wants to explain his situation to your father that he cares for you and has feelings for you and hates to see you married off to some other guy that you care nothing for.
2007-10-18 10:31:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
Frankly if my girlfriend told me she was marrying somebody else the last thing on my mind would be encouragement of her forthcoming nuptial aggreements. I would walk away before i got further attatched to her, the fact that your guy is even still talking to you shows remarkable self restraint.
I don't see how you could have expected him to support you.
2007-10-18 13:08:20 · answer #10 · answered by Very happily married. 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋