I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years and he endup up getting one of his best friends pregnant, right before we met. They have known each other since 1994, they went to highschool together in Maryland, he now lives in Philadelphia. Do you think its normal for them to love each other. She sometimes sends him text messages saying "I luv u", "I miss u" or "we love u" (meaning her and their son). I don't know what to think. He tells me that, of course he loves her, they are best friends. What do i do?
2007-10-18 03:24:55 · 14 answers · asked by Gi952 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You either accept it or not....He's telling you that he very much has a good bond with her that in that way but, he's with you.....You have been together for two years so its not something I would read too much into....If that was the case they would be together and you wouldn't have been together this long....I know that it bothers you and I know it would bother me if this was me but its something you got into when you started a relationship with him...So its like your in the middle kinda of....Hopefully, that bond he has will level out where he doesn't have to express it because it does bother you but that is something you may have to sit down and talk to him about....I know that I care about my "ex" but I don't tell him when I speak to him....Especiallly out of respect for my husband...I hope things get better for you....
2007-10-18 03:56:07 · answer #1 · answered by Yvette D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well one let him know that you don't like that and it's not appropriate (which it is not). Hell he might at well tell his ex wife I want to be with you still but I have a girlfriend. You can love the child and love the idea that the woman that is my friend had my baby but you don't send stuff like that to another woman if you are in a relationship. You find a friend and you start doing it and see how he reacts.
See that's called holding on and I got you syndrome. His best friend made it a point that no matter what I'm going to always be the person in your life. I'm your friend, I have your baby so that means he's not going anywhere and I mean more to him than any other woman. She likes that control and he's ok with it and nobody can tell him different.
I would just as well find someone else and a call it a day. It's wrong and I wouldn't stand for it.
2007-10-18 10:36:48 · answer #2 · answered by level_9yo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, there are several different kids of love in this world. And they may honestly love each other as friends. My question to you is, why are you question his trust? What has he done that you don't trust him?
But, there isn't much you can do... You never want to come in between a father and his child. If that means the baby momma drama, then you have to put up with it. Besides, this all started all before he met you, so if you can't deal with it now, what makes 2 years later different?
2007-10-18 10:31:00 · answer #3 · answered by Beatngu 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have a child with my ex and i am married now and i would never tell him that i love him. there are different kinds of love of course if he is in love with her then you have a problem and if he loves her because she is a good friend and she was his first love and they have a child together then i wouldn't worry about it to much. did they have a relationship or just a baby? that depends to if they were in a relationship and it didn't work out then they already know that they aren't good together and if they weren't they then probably would never be more than friends because if that were the case they would still be together right. i love my sons dad but i'm not in love with him. he was my first love and we were together for 5 years, and he is the father of my son, i know i could never be with him again because i don't have feelings like that for him. and even though she says i love you to him it doesn't mean he has to say it back to her. if he loves and respects you he wouldn't say it back to her. and the other girl should respect your relationship enough not to say that to him. maybe you should talk to her because you aren't getting anywhere with him cause to him theres nothing wrong with it, but how would he feel if you were telling your male ex boyfriends that you love them he would be pissed. or not even an ex just a male friend in general. i would talk to them before i made any big decisions. but in my own opinion i don't think its right and its very disrespectful to you.
2007-10-18 10:49:54 · answer #4 · answered by Dan D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is the way me and my baby daddy :) are with one another. Just be thankful that you've met someone who can handle this maturely. Its ok to love others, in fact the world needs more of it!
I have plenty of female and guy friends whom I love and/or miss. Some I've slept with some I haven't. Doesn't mean I want to marry them or spend the rest of my life with them in any way other than friends.
This is your problem and/or insecurity...if you can't understand or handle it maturely then maybe you should move on.
2007-10-18 10:33:06 · answer #5 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because he loves her doesn't mean he's in love with her, and he should love her she is the mother of his son. Get to know the girl and become friends with her too, they are going to be in each others lives for the rest of their lives because of their son, if you want to be with him you have to accept that and just get to know her.
2007-10-18 10:32:52 · answer #6 · answered by mhireangel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is not telling you something. It sounds like he's trying to be a player. Does she know about you? Best friends with benefits? Come on now...you need to find someone else. It's gonna get worse once you two get really serious..it's not going to get better.
2007-10-18 10:32:27 · answer #7 · answered by Miss H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guarantee if he was my man.... he wouldnt be after that. You need to spell it out to him that this isnt working for you, It doesnt matter whether they are best friends or not.... he has made a commitment to you and you should be his best friends. Put your foot down and get a back bone..... Hes walking all over you
2007-10-18 10:31:28 · answer #8 · answered by crazyworld 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with above.............run for your life! I think that he will soon realize that he wants to be more a part of his son's life. and certainly if he says that he loves her now.
2007-10-18 10:35:15 · answer #9 · answered by notsaying 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like they will end up being together, and you will be left out in the cold
2007-10-18 10:44:28 · answer #10 · answered by poodle mom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋