How do you keep your relationship special? My husband & I seem to be drifting apart!!! When we go out together (which is very rare) we can still have a good time (sort of) but if any of his friends happen to show up, off w/ them he goes & I'm out of the picture.
2007-10-17 19:00:47 · 12 answers · asked by ♥bigmamma♥ 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm not that big, I just like the name! Duh!
2007-10-17 19:08:23 · update #1
I've told him this for the past 3 years, but either he doesn't care, doesn't understand, is too busy?? I don't know--I guess he's happy this way?! I know after so many years people get in a rut, but I just don't like it!
2007-10-17 19:10:13 · update #2
We've been together for 25 years & yes, he makes me feel special. And I try to do the same for him. But sometimes life is just very hectic, things must get done and there's always this nuisance thingy called WORK that keeps interferring. Just take some time out for a long Saturday night, gf! Leave the house by 4:30, have an early supper, have him take you to a store that sell adult toys and other items of interest (wink, wink) and go back home with a nice bottle of wine & a groovy R&B CD. Have fun playing together with your new toys and don't forget to share!
2007-10-17 19:20:05 · answer #1 · answered by Chiksita 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had an ex who was like this sometimes and it made me feel much like I was "second best" (to the booze and the buds, that is).
It's not necessarily a malicious thing, he may just be thoughtless at times. Perhaps when you go out, you need to do things that interest both of you so that he doesn't feel the need to wander off?
My current partner and I have been together for a year and living together for half that time (so it's still a fresh relationship), but when we go out it's not the same old dinner and movies stuff... this is what becomes boring in a relationship!
We both love hotrods and old cars so we go to car show and nostalgia drag races... we also go to the drive-in cinemas (for something different) and on weekends we just make a MASSIVE breakfast together and eat it at the table in the backyard.
Hope some of that helps.. good luck! x
2007-10-17 19:12:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband and i are married for 5 years now. We are happy together and he still makes me feel special. Since we got married, we agreed that we can't sleep if anyone is upset from the other, so far we kept that promise. We also never bring up old situations that happened before. We try to create excitement in our marriage. I suggest that you talk to your husband again in a romantic situation you create for him. Make a deal with him, that you give him some time with his friends but when you are with him, it is your time only. Let him know that you really enjoy spending time with him alone. Make nice surprises for him from time to time, things that he likes. Also, try to go out more often. Once a week or something. That's what my husband and i do and we have a 2 1/2 years old daughter. I hope i helped you.
Good Luck ;)
2007-10-17 19:26:21 · answer #3 · answered by NSTardie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have been with my hubby for nearly 30 yrs.
We seem to have the same prob at times but we do know that we love each other and have each other to lean on.
We took a cruise last year and it was the best time we have had in our lives.
He was just so relaxed and I just love having something to do all the time or just sit and watch the waves, it was just great.
Everything was planned out for us during the day and nite, all great.
We are planning #2 cruise and even #3 cruise, maybe you should try one?
Good luck
2007-10-17 19:08:47 · answer #4 · answered by kitty 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
After 16 years, 3 kids.......I am the least important person on his list. Not a consideration......he might as well have been cheating on me (one thing he'd never do, I'd be more likely) for the last 5+ years, for putting me last, degrading me to my face and behind my back feels the same or worse. I'm still here because I "think he'll change".......he can only change himself I know.
We're only cheating ourselves,......they probably know we are too good for them, are threatened by it, and want us to feel the opposite so they can blame us when we leave.
If you don't have kids.......run!!!! If you do, be strong! There is a fine line between love and hate which is irrational but strong.
Good luck and God Bless.......
2007-10-18 01:56:56 · answer #5 · answered by Jenispent 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A man who loves, respects, and trust u.. will treat u like he did when he first met u..
romance leaves the relationship when the two of you begin to stray..
men are not good with feelings..
and rather than talking/discussing what they are feeling.. they just ingore it and act out..
which only leads to a bigger division..
cuz then they really don't want to talk ~~~afraid they will say something they shouldn't..
My abusive painter.. never cheated on me.. he really loved me.. he was very insecure and was afraid I would leave him for someone better..
and he thought beating me into submission.. would make me stay..
boy, was his mind screwed up..!!!!
I finally ran like hell.. and after 37 years.. he can now tell me,, he was sorry... , and I knew all a long he loved me, and he tells our son,,, he still does.
My mentally abusive..partner..loved me.. and I knew he did.. cuz he was such a gentleman... in many ways..
He still stays in contact w/ me and we take the g'kids to 6 flags, buys like he is the daddy for Christmas.. but we are only friends and nothing more..
MY point in telling u this, is
Men as a rule don't want to talk for 2 reasons.. a)They don't want to disappoint u..
they don't no how to express,
they feel it is sissy to do such..
b) They are scared they will say someting to make matters worse by the things they have done,,
and the partner will not forgive them and leave..
Think back when u meet him..
does he do any of the things he did back then? or does it just take ur love for granted??
I have lived by this saying
It is better love and lossed ~~~~~
than to never of been loved at all...
I no what love feels like.. to give and to receive..
That comes with pain, worries, fears, tears,, al the things good and bad..
I just hoped afterwards we would still be together..
NOT...
I refuse to allow anyone to abuse me, or my love, in any way ..... form... or fashion.. any more..
even if I stay single forever.. !!!!
I am worth more than that.. !!!! and u are tooo...
2007-10-17 19:54:52 · answer #6 · answered by ♥ Blondie ♥ 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
me and my b/f have been together for 2 years and he is still the same as when i met him. He is always rubbing my feet and back, he cooks for me and helps me clean, he will bring me coffee in bed. I like to keep our relationship new by dropping hints in weird places that he will see them. like in his lunchbox, or in his pocket of the pants i know he will wear the next day. He has written me love notes on the bathroom mirrow. Little things that add up to be big things. You should def. sit down and have a talk with him about the feelings you are having though. Always talk about you feelings with your significant other!!!
2007-10-17 19:07:01 · answer #7 · answered by ~So much FUN~ 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes he does. We will have been married 1 year October 19th 2007. My husband bought me roses after our wedding and we'll sometimes go out to eat.
2007-10-17 19:07:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not go to an intimate dinner instead of just partying? Anytime you go partying, you take the risk of running into friends. It is natural that he would want to talk to them because he sees you all of the time.
2007-10-17 19:08:08 · answer #9 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, he does still make me feel special, and weve been together for 13 years, you should confront your husband about this, after all communication in marriage is important
good luck
2007-10-17 19:07:47 · answer #10 · answered by Amy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋