My wife is getting upset because I dont do anything around the house.?

Question

I am unemployed, so i need to do alot around the house. but how to i get motivated to clean. its really freakin hard for me.

Answer 1

Come on man... your at home and you wont atleast clean up any body would be mad at that... Stop being spoiled and help your wife because if the shoe was on the other foot youd expect her to... I dont blame her for being angry.

Answer 2

Just remember you're not the only one. EVERYone finds it tough to get motivated to clean, do chores, work, etc. It's not something anyone likes to do. However remember that if you workout, stay active, and do these things then it becomes easier to stay active and do this type of thing. If you lounge around and watch TV or feel depressed then this makes it more difficult to do something productive and you start to lay around more etc. So you need to motivate yourself. You need to get up and just do it one day at a time. Then before you know it everything will be easier. This is why when you're working out you can keep working out but if you take a break it's so hard to get started again.

Answer 3

If it makes you feel better, most women have a hard time getting motivated to clean too. It's not that fun, but it's necessary, and a clean house is worth it. Having so much extra time makes it even harder to get motivated.

My suggestion is that you set the timer on the stove for 10 minutes and do as many chores as you can in that 10 minutes. I bet once you get going you'll feel good about it, and you won't quit until you're done.

Your marriage is going to have a lot of tension and unhappiness in it if you don't start helping out. The ultimate solution is for you to get another job, but in the meantime, unless you want to be utterly miserable and maybe even divorced, pull out that vacuum! Women everywhere understand what you're going through, and we know you can do it!

Answer 4

Have you ever been evaluated to see if you might be clinically depressed? That sounds so much like what I have suffered from...it feels impossible at times to clean...and it becomes very overwhelming.

I am not saying that makes it "okay", but it might give you some insight as to why it is so hard for you to get motivated.

Sometimes when I need help getting motivated, I go to flylady.net. This is a place where they offer free points on how to get the house cleaned. It is for people like you and me who simply are having a hard time getting motivated. Every day, you start with making beds...shining the sink, etc. Each day you get an email( if you choose to allow emails) and it will tell you which area to tackle that day.

Good luck to you...might want to look at one of those online depression quizzes to see if you might be clinically depressed. Here is one link to one if you would like to try. http://depression.about.com/cs/diagnosis/l/bldepscreenquiz.htm

Answer 5

You just have to realize that your wife can't do it all, I would suggest that you maybe try listing to music while you clean then it won't be so boring to you. Another suggestion is even when you do find a job still help your wife around the house because it is not fair for her to have to work and take care of the house and you get away with just working.

Answer 6

Are you depressed? Most of the time when a person suffers from depression they lack motivation to do anything. Or sometimes it looks as if there is so much to do they don't know where to start so they just don't.
See a doctor. Try and make yourself do things even when you don't feel like it. Usually a person is glad that they did. Also, set small goals for yourself. Don't try and do everything in one day. Just small jobs until you are acclimated to it.

Answer 7

Mike,
I began helping around the house after my wife got pregnant and have never quit. My children have seen me doing dishes, laundry, and cleaning for many years. They are ages 16 through 22 now and we have been married for over 32 years. I expect if you begin by just picking up and sweeping the house she will see that you are beginning to help. You need to begin and expend your horizons to do a number of time-consuming things that she is now unable to do. GOD expects us to work together in a marriage and I try to do my part to help. It will make her happy and in the long-run you will be happier too. Have a great week!
Thanks,
Eds


.

Answer 8

find something that you enjoy, like chocolate or cigarettes. I always turn on some music, and clean one room at a time. When i have completed one room, i get to sit down and smoke. Do that with all the rooms. And if you don't want to clean, then you don't get cigarettes or whatever until you do. Make an incintive.

Answer 9

why is it hard. what makes it hard? is it cause its boring.
Even if you start doing something it will make you feel better.
Maybe ur depressed? That is hard...u should go talk to the doc about it...
Otherwise.buckle up and get er done. Housework is not fun thats why its called work. IF YOU have a plan do it in the morning.....then u have the rest of the day to do whatever.

Answer 10

You are probably depressed.
You also need to focus on getting another job.
You also need to help out because it isn't fair to leave the whole darn load on your wife.

You can pick a task to do during breaks, and even break it up by the day... clean the bathroom on Monday, pick up and vacuum on Tuesday... you get the idea. Create a schedule.