Prenup question !?

Question

I have been with my boyfriend for several years (before he had anything) and now he has asked me for a prenup. I am pretty well off myself, but I feel that a prenup is a sign of mistrust. I feel that marriage is a give and take (compromising) relationship. If you are going to say "I do for enternity" then you should have no problem putting it all on the line as I am willing to do. What do you think ?

Answer 1

I would never sign one, but I would also never marry someone who I thought there was even the slightest chance of getting divorced from. A prenup is setting up your future post-marriage. Isn't that sad? Although, as already pointed out, over 50% of marriages fail, and I believe it's somewhere around during the first 7 years.
Here's your question: are you marrying someone that you want to grow old with, are willing to make things work, even through the hard times, with, no matter what will always love? There is a common misconception, I think, that marriage is not a permanent thing but more of a fling, a convenience, a marriage-will-fix-us sickness.
If you have reservations about it, listen to yourself. You know him and the dynamics of your relationship better than anyone else.

Answer 2

If I was pretty well off and someone asked for a prenup agreement, I might sign that but I would never marry this person until he had as much as I did so that it wouldn't matter anyhow and because of the way people are or can be, I would be very cautious. I answered a question a moment ago by a woman who trusted someone - and it could well happen to a man also -who was being used by a person who thought loved her when he loved her money more!!
try going to handwritingwizard.com, look at the samples there and use that to help you think about this. That has been shown to be some 85% accurate in finding out more about people from their handwriting.
He may be a great guy but remember that because you say I do and put it all on the line doesn't mean that he will or that he will not be over controlling in the marriage. Just take it slow, step by step, and I hope this works out for you.

Answer 3

Everything you said is true -- now, back to the real world. Most marriages end in horrible divorce. That's just the way it is. If you two are lucky and work at it you will be together until you both croak, so the prenup means nothing afterall. If not, then I guess he was right all along, so what harm is a prenup other than your feelings are hurt. If you love each other then get over it, sign the damn prenup and get on with life.
Sheeze....

Answer 4

If you are an established adult, you really should consider a prenup. What it does is protect the assets you have amassed prior to the marriage, then anything else that comes during the marriage is usually considered "community property".

I hope you have a good lawyer ready.
Have the lawyer read over his prenup carefully so you don't wind up with a mass of debt if the marriage dissolves, and you want first dibs on the kids.

Look at it this way... it is a really good TEST of the person you are considering marrying.

Answer 5

This is a good thing...right now, as you should, you figure your love is worth the chance that later things could go to crap and one of you lose everything...which is sadly the case for alot of people nowadays, especially men. They get horribly used and spend a good deal of their life PAYING ($$) for it...however, you need to be aware that there's always a chance that it can go to crap. You may be like me, and want nothing more than what you had to begin with. Another woman may look to get even with him and take what he does have. Like wise, he may be the kind that would only want what he had to begin with, but another guy may not. You need to be protected too. God forbid that something bad should happen in the future, I really hope it does not, but if does, you're both protected and it will make a potentially messy breakup alot smoother, at least when its time to go to court. This may see like a selfish thing on his part, but he's protecting you both. Most of us girls are very emotional and we don't address the factual side of things during this time in our lives. Truth is, we could lose everything just as easy as a man can, and you won't want that to deal with on top of the emotional trauma in a divorce.

Answer 6

In this day and age you can use a pre-nup to your advantage. Don't get an attitude about it. Make it work for you and for him. Cover both of you and make sure all your i's are dotted and all your t's are crossed. Nothing is written in stone as far as a relationship and growing old together. That's just not realistic. So, sit down together and figure out what is important for each of you individually, and to both of you together and get on it.

Answer 7

Ask him to sign a prenup for you first, and see how he reacts. What's good for the gander is also good for the goose.

Answer 8

Yes, it's true, it is a sign of mistrust due to society and statistiscs (50% of all married end). So, there is a 50% chance that you and he will get divorced. That's pretty high stakes, even for a dummy who doesn't know any better. I'm assuming you're not marrying a stupid person!

Answer 9

well if you 2 have bought and built things taking both your money to do so i wouldn't want one.. but if one or the other has lots of assets before they got together they might want to protect there interest so if it didnt work out they wouldnt lose what they had before you got together.. you would want to know what it all says before you did it and let a lawyer see it.. dont sign nothing without understanding it.. good luck

Answer 10

Another gold digger crying for her feelings. If you are well off then what's the proble.