ok my bf of 2years has been saying he wants to marry me. I finaly say yes to find out he means a COMMENT ceremony. his moms been married 5times he 37 has never been married. her ideal so what the hell is that. I'm not worth his last name cuz moms relationships were doomed/////????????????? HELP
2007-10-17 16:29:46 · 9 answers · asked by ladywolf 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Do you mean a commitment ceremony? If that is indeed what you're talking about, you basically go through the motions of marriage but nothing is legally binding. I think he's basically slapping you in the face by saying, "I want to marry you, but I don't think this is going to work out so lets not make it legal." Marriage is marriage...everything else is just...NOT. If I were you I would tell him that it's either all or nothing.
2007-10-17 16:35:02 · answer #1 · answered by Melissa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, I believe you mean 'commitment' ceremony. This is a ceremony in which you are not legally married, but you express commitment to one another. Frankly, you'd be as good as married. He probably is gun shy about marriage. He watched his mother go through 5 travesties. That's enough to turn anyone off. Plus, there are horrible marriages all over the place. Friends, coworkers, this site... That said, men also wouldn't get married unless they had a pretty damn compelling reason to do so. Men view marriage as what it does while women view it as what it means. He's following his mother's advice. Tell him this: If you had only one or five experiences with a hammer; and all 5 times you picked up the hammer and hit yourself over the head, you would say, "Ouch! That hurts. Hammers are bad. I don't like hammers. I don't ever want another hammer in my life, again. And I'm going to advise my son that he shouldn't get a hammer, either." It's not the hammer's fault; you'd be using it wrong. His mother was married to 5 horrible people. It isn't marriage's fault; she was just using it wrong. Tell your boyfriend (and his mother) that you are going to get married. It's as simple as that. Just because she had horrible experiences doesn't mean that you will. Or anyone else for that matter. It's as simple as that.
2007-10-17 17:06:01 · answer #2 · answered by MWestbrook 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to make sure that YOU get what YOU want and need out of life. And that includes having a man who loves you so much that he's begging you to marry him. This guy
is an idiot!
2007-10-17 18:14:52 · answer #3 · answered by Sondra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to find out what the real word is before trying to get married because the word is NOT "comment."
2007-10-17 16:46:15 · answer #4 · answered by Truth Hurts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marry him fast... like right now or tomorrow. This is a great idea.
Divorce attorneys like myself love people like you because you pay for my house, cars, boat, motorcycle, and children's education!
2007-10-17 16:35:36 · answer #5 · answered by box of rain 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You want marriage and obviously he doesn't. That's life. You have to decide what is more important to you, your relationship with this man or marriage.
2007-10-17 17:10:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mother's boy. Run, don't walk, to the nearest exit. You will never be able to compete with her. No woman will be able to. Don't make yourself miserable trying to.
2007-10-17 16:39:34 · answer #7 · answered by ♪♫♪The♪♫♪ Duchess 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds pretty wishy washy to me....... have your cake and eat it too, but without a true committment.
2007-10-17 23:12:43 · answer #8 · answered by Jeffrey P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you mean commitment?
2007-10-17 16:35:27 · answer #9 · answered by mergirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋